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by redb_ball is away on December 30th, 2006

redb_ball is away

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What can you say to someone who just lost someone special?

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Answers. 10 helpful answers below.

  • by Mr. McClister on December 30th, 2006

    Mr. McClister

    I can't pretend to understand what you're going thru; however, I am genuinely sorry.

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  • by Anonymous on December 30th, 2006

    Anonymous

    Be consoling and passionate. tell this person that you are here for them and to let you know if there is anything you can help them with.

    Just being there shows you care and this person will sense this from you.

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  • by sara on February 7th, 2009

    sara

    just say "im just really sorry for your loss... I don't know why these things happen. but for chritians, death is bitter sweet, I mean yes we're glad that our loved ones are in heaven and we will see them soon, But the truth is that we would much rather have our loved one here right now with us. and it might be a selffish wish because god probably needs them more than we do, but just cherish the memories. I can't say that I know how you feel, but im here for you if you want to talk"

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  • by tomsims on December 30th, 2006

    tomsims

    I would say, "I am so very sorry," or something like that, and then, I would shut up and sit or stand in silence until the person said something or not. By being silent with them, I give them permission to speak and I inidcate a willingness to listen or just to be there.

    I will take my cues from them. If they seem to want to talk, I might ask some questions.

    I might even ask them to tell me about that person.

    Here are some openers (beyond the initial). Just be natural and real.

    "Tell me about John."

    "How long did you know him?"

    "He must have been very special."

    "you must feel devastated."

    "I can't imagine how you are feeling now and what you are going through."

    "I'm here."

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  • by EL1 2 on December 30th, 2006

    EL1 2

    Sometimes just being there is more important than saying anything. A hug and silent compassion, to me, is more meaningful than words.

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  • by HEYTHERE on February 7th, 2009

    HEYTHERE

    Not much. But you can bring them dinner, or watch their dog, or clean their house, or....

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  • by Firebrand on December 30th, 2006

    Firebrand

    There is no need to feel enbarrassment or not talk about the person. What Mr Mc. said is as close as you can come. Just 'I am sorry ' that is fine.

    I speak from 48 hours experience.

    PLEASE DO NOT RATE THIS

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  • by Volt on January 2nd, 2007

    Volt

    You say nothing to them, you must silently ply them with lots of vodka and patiently sit and listen to them and hug them in a semi comforting way.

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  • by HappyJeans on January 2nd, 2007

    HappyJeans

    I wouldn't, saying things like "i'm so sorry" etc makes it about you, and really doesn't help.

    Just being there is the most important thing.

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  • by TheAnswerer on December 30th, 2006

    TheAnswerer

    "Everything is going to be all right. Just relax and try to keep your mind off the event. We could go to a movie or something like that?"

    I would say just try to get the person to take his/her mind off what happened and attempt to just have fun. It always feels good to have someone cheer you up.

    [EDIT]
    And as WendoraUSNY said (Thanks!) just leave them alone for a few days and then you should ask. You don't want to overwhelm them.

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