ANSWERS: 12
  • What exactly do they claim you don't care about Freedom? Just be yourself and if you think you need to change then by all means do that. Don't change because they think you need to.
  • I agree with Zack. Be yourself, if it doesn't work out, it's their problem, not yours.
  • There really is nothing you can do and still be yourself. Love is not about who can change to fit another's needs it is about accepting people for who they are as a whole. a compromise is only for entering in new waters as a couple. Please don't assume that it is you that needs to change. sounds like they are having an issue (usually brought on by guilt). When someone complains in a relationship it is sometimes brought on by what they are doing and trying to shift the blame so they do not feel so bad. True love is not blind, as it shows the parts of people they often do not see in themselves.
  • Oh, in guy talk that means they want BJs
  • If you are being a genuine person and treating them and yourself with respect I don't see why you'd need to change.
  • Tell them you care so much that you're willing to sleep with their friends-which would they like to go first?
  • Perhaps the kind of guy that needs affirmation is not exactly your type. You don't need to change yourself, just find guys who speak your "love language" or, if you really do like the guy, learn how to speak his language so that he will know how you feel. This site has some good info: http://www.fivelovelanguages.com/learn.html It may be a religious site, but it's not the focal point. The five love languages are distinct ways we perceive expressions of love and affection. Learn your own language as well as that of your partner and you can better communicate your feelings to them and vice versa. The information really helped me in my marriage.
  • Do you express an interest in the things they like? Do you appear pleased when they call, email, or visit? Men like to feel appreciated, especially if they are doing things they may not necessarily enjoy or want to in order to please you. Being yourself is good, but taking the opportunity to appreciate your guy will do a lot to make him feel like you "care".
  • I read the other answers here and I have to disagree. Not on the sentiment that it's important to be yourself, but saying there is never a cause to change in a relationship is just wrong. You must grow together. Now, that said. You don't need to change who you are, in this case they are asking that you show it a little more. Not a terrible thing. A kiss goodbye, rather than a wave. A call goodnight if you're not together (even just now and then). A hand rubbed on his leg while at dinner. Any sort of recognition that other people aren't going to show him, that will come across as adoration from a guy. Now you don't want to be constantly hanging on him in public. Most guys will consider that needy and clingy. Many of the things I mentioned are small and personal things no one else will ever notice. Anything like that is perfect for when you want him to feel noticed, but don't want everyone in the room to get uncomfortable (including the two of you). Remember, to care about someone often requires some changes to be with them. Love who you are. Love it more when you realize your partner is happier. This goes for both sexes.
  • Try oral sex. That always works with me.
  • When a woman (nb: when I was single, of course) tells me how she feels about me, that shows me she is willing to vulnerable and trusting. When she elicits my feelings, it shows me she cares about how I feel, not always an easy topic for some men to discuss. That is a really good place to start. I also like fun surprises, like inviting me to be a guest for dinner (i.e. her cooking) or an idea for a night out that pleases her. Stuff like that J! I hope this helps. PS here is an SGI Buddhist quote that is the signature on my e-mail, I love it so much! (note: "Joy means that both oneself and others have wisdom and compassion"...omg...this is so true J!!!!) "Joy is not simply your personal, egoistic happiness. Nor is it making others happy at the expense of your own happiness. You and others delighting together, you and others becoming happy together-this is the Mystic Law and the wondrous thing about our realm of kosen-rufu (world peace). The Daishonin (13th century Buddhist reformer) states, 'Joy means that both oneself and others have wisdom and compassion'. -Daisaku Ikeda
  • this is catch 22. If you show you care, then they will complain about you being clingy! Just be yourself, the right guy will like you the way you are.

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