ANSWERS: 33
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"So, who's hungry?"
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"This funeral sucks"
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Throw em in the hole already. He/She wasn't THAT great of a person.
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"I'm horney"
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I am so not sorry for your loss, if you saw the way this guy drank he had it coming.
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I'd still do her.
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Nice box
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"Who's dead?" To wife of dead friend: "So I guess you'll be looking for someone else then" I told you he was ill (thanks Milligan)
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how much for his car
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The joke, "What's the difference between a wedding and a funeral? Nothing, either way a stiff gets buried." My Papa (grandfather) used to love that joke. I cracked that one and a few others at his funeral. People were giving me dirty looks. One lady leered at me so long, that my Nonny (grandmother) looked at her and said, "if you think Chuck would be upset about that, then you didn't know him very well."
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Thank GOD they finally kicked the bucket!
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Never knew her/him, I'm her to pick up chicks?
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this is a few months ago and I was at the funeral for a guy named George with my brother's girlfriend and she lacked brains big time. We are standing in line to say our grief to the family, people are crying, right before it is my turn to say the grief, she says loudly: "Where is George himself? I haven't seen him anywhere." lol. i cracked up so hard, i had to make an obvious escape from the line.
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Are the pubs open yet?
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My, they look better now than when they were alive!
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can i have her jewellery - she never wore it anyway?
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What's that burning smell?
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I FARTED! NO-BODY MOVE AND NO BODY SMOKE!
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Oh my God, who's that? That's not my mother in that casket!
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"Ding, dong, the witch is dead!" for best effect, hire a chorus of midgets, and dance on the casket
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walk up to the deceased' spouse,"Don't cry, its not so bad. nobody liked him/her anyway."
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He/She is still an a-hole so who cares
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"omg he looks ugly!, look at his skin!" or "soo when are we getting our inheritance[money/share]??"
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if it is a young hot girl it would be "yeah i hit that" and to make it worse say "it was good"
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HE JUST MOVED. I saw it with my own eyes!!!!!
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"At least, I thought she was a hooker but I don't remember paying her."
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"Oh screw this, everyone knows what a hateful woman she was and the world is better off" :) (I'll probably go to hell for that eulogy) LMAO
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woop woop
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Wow he/she really looks good in the coffin, I could just about do him/her right now.
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"I never liked him anyway! "
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Come back when you grow up girl.
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"right! that's all done, now where's the free booze?"
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probably to say youre glad the person died
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