What happens if the woman that your boyfriend cheated on you with is having his kid? even if he seems like he's really changed since the situation occured is there any way to actually ever forgive them?
by 
oomtoall
ANSWERS: 13
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If that were my sitiation and i were able to accept him even after this mistake.... Of course he's forgiven. But I wouldnt forget it... I NEVER forget it. I doubt id stay with him though.. cheating is sooo not cool! BUT if I did, id forgive
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I don't know if it was the best decision to forgive a cheater in the first place; but I see situations where people do and it is acceptable at times. I believe if you have already accepted him for cheating, then it would be hard not to accept him for having a child with the woman. It's very unfortunate, but the child is a result of the cheating that you already accepted and forgave him for. The child should still be looked at as a gift in my mind and treated equally, as the child is a result from cheating but at the same time had nothing to do with the cheating man. If it were me though, I wouldn't accept him cheating on you and it may be your chance to get out of the situation.
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I could not forgive him.
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Yeah, this is a toughie. Honestly, I don't think I can take him back. I mean you have the next (at least) 18 years of reminder and it would be difficult for me to deal with. I wouldn't want to ever risk the child's emotional growth because I am subconsciously showing any resentment. What happens if you two go through a financial hardship (for an example) and he HAS TO pay child support? Can you get through without ever bringing up "if you didn't cheat on me...". I can't do it.
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Of course you must forgive. And your BF must be the father to his child and you must be cheerful, understanding, and compassionate about the situation. Don't steal the child's father from him or her.
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The question is, are you willing to put up with "baby mama drama"? Pick your relationships wisely, because you may find yourself stuck with unnecessary baggage that could last a lifetime.
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My husband cheated on me, and the girl had a baby. Even if he's changed, even if you might find a way to forgive him - this girl and this child are NOT going away. Are you ready to live with it being in your face, day in and day out? P.S. - even tho you didn't ask: no, he hasn't really changed; no, he isn't EVER going to change; and you are a fool if you take him back.
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Forgive him you must but forget it? Hell no. You can forgive the action but keep in mind that this woman and the evidence of his infidelity (the child) will be in your life for years and years and years to come. Are you willing to deal with that?
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I just went through this unfortunate experience myself...my BF has a baby on the way with someone that he cheated on me with. Let me just say that it is a humiliating experience. Like all of the answers before,.,that child is going to be a constant reminder of his indescretion and it's not fair to yourself to stay and deal with the blatant disrespect that he had for you. the only reason he seems to have changed is because he's been exposed, otherwise he would have kept cheating...I let go of my situation and moved on to someone that appreciates me. the ex is drowning in his own drama... be true to yourself and move on
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Yeah.. Been through the same situation recently.. Only difference is I just found out about the child after 7 months! We separated for a few months, but the baby was definitely conceived while we were together. The whole situation is unfair to you and in my case I don't have any children yet so it was really a smack in the face. In my mind, I can't ever get over it. The only way I would feel "even" is to have a baby by someone else (which I would never do) but at least he would know how it feels.
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I would never be able to stay with him, but if you feel like you have a chance of making it, good luck. You have a hard future ahead of you though.
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Once a cheater, always a cheater. Leave him and find a real man. If there is no trust, there is no relationship left.
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Time for you to move on as he will always be tied up with the baby from the woman he cheated with and she will always be in your life. time to move on and find a man that loves you and no other.
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