I can't explain it, but I really feel close to her, and I know she isn't to blame, he was ill. I just feel like we both loved a very troubled man and that we might find comfort in each other.

It might work but at the sametime it might not and cause way more pain. She might blame you for his wanting to leave and then being torn. And you might resent her for having his children, so its a very touchy issue.

no offense, it must have been horrible to lose someone you thought was your soulmate but why in the world would you want to be friends with the person who drove him to suicide?!

I don't belive that anyone can really be responsible for someone else's suicide entirely. People endure all sorts of adverse circumstances without killing themselves. Depression, a real physical disease, is responsible for most suicides. Neither you nor she could have seen it coming. Neither of you could most likely have prevented it. I am so sorry for your loss. It must be devastating. If you wish to be friends with this woman, that is up to you. However, you need to understand that there may be baggage between you including unresolved resentments and lingering questions. Some of these things may come up. She may very well have been difficult, but that is not what made your fiance suicidal. He must have already been at high risk. Nevertheless, somewhere inside of you, you are not so sure about that. Do what you can handle and grace be with you.

Don't take it the wrong way, but you should seek a psychiatric consultation before attempting this. Talk it out with a professional. They may provoke thoughts that simply didn't come to mind for you. Even if you're a spirit that feels at one with your feelings, there are things you may not quite understand. You may discover that it might not be the best thing to do. Then again, you may discover that if it is, a new way of doing so will be presented. I didn't mean a psychologist either. Psychology is about emotions. Psychiatry is about the mind, which controls emotions. There's a big difference there. The mind and emotions are fascinating. Just trying to help out. Good fortunes.

Unless you held the gun or what ever and assisted him you are NOT to blame. It was something out of your control, something you can not change. I'm sorry for your loss and I understand the grief, confusion, guilt and all of the other crap that comes when someone kills themselves - the questions left unanswered can drive a person around the bend if they do not figure out early on that it WAS NOT THEIR FAULT. Healing is only possible when we let go and let God (whatever you understand God to be - be it the biblical God or be it the happenstance of the universe and the continuance of life). Karma most likely has little to do with this. Again it is NOT YOUR FAULT not the exes nor the judges, nor the serving officer who produced the papers that the case was going to court. This is on the BF. I would strongly urge grief counseling. Survivors of suicides are hit much harder by the death that other folk who have a death to live through. A professional therapist should be consulted in this case to give guidance and a solid shoulder to cry on and to ask the unanswerable questions like 'Why?'. No you will not get a 'real' answer, but you will have someone trained to answer in a way that you can find the peace you need to move on.