Depends on the man.
And how close he was to ejaculation when he lost his erection.
I would wager that nothing happened, and lying may be due to far much more than making you upset.
He is failing to be a man - That is what it is and that is EXACTLY how he must be viewing his inability to 'finish the job'. The irony here is that his lying is going to make it worse since the next time he has sex he will stress even more, losing erection, failing to do his bit, it can become a vicious circle.
I take it that you want a kid. That alone is going to lead to some performance issues - the extra stress of not being able to maintain an erection is going to heap on a whole lotta bad ju-ju in the sex department.
I'm not saying let it all slide, but do, for the sake of your relationship and the sake of his sexual health accept that he felt something come out as truth - do not question it, do not second guess it and do not approach the subject with him until you all are around 90 years old or have been married for 65 years - which ever comes first.
Why I say this is that he is already having problems and any more stress or questions or debates or accusations are going to make matters worse. Instead of losing an erection he may end up not getting one at all... with you... I think you can finish that thought and see clearly down what road that goes. It happens in relationships that a man can't function with his spouse but can function with a prostitute, a mistress, the hand, etcetera.
Of course now days we have the treatment option of the Viagra or Cialais pill so not much emphasis is placed on the emotional/mental causes of erectile dysfunction(s).
Since he can get an erection we can assume he does not have a physical cause for erectile dysfunction, since he lost the erection I bet he is not as sure about having a kid as he may have said, or what you may think he may have said or meant - and I do not think he is fully aware that he does have an issue with being a daddy.
If he says he wants kids he may be telling the truth - however the mind is a crazy place to play in at times and we can delude ourselves into saying yes when our heart or our guts are screaming NO!.
Just the thought of bringing another screaming hungry mouth into the world plays havoc with the guts and heart. The mind may be able to sort through the logistics part, financial, space, time, energy - but the heart and guts part of it "Am I ready?" "Will I make a good parent?" "what if I really F___ up this kid?" Etcetera and so forth... Will have a will of their own and will have an effect on the body, especially in men who can be stressed out of performing.
His mind may be saying yes, but I think that there may very well be emotional stumbling blocks that has lead to the dysfunction and may even lead to the more complex half-truth/lying to himself and you about what happened to save face and still come out of it being a 'man'.
This is not a simple problem of 'he lied to me' and the reason he lied is not a simple 'to appease me'. You are looking at a very complex sexual related issue which ties his penis into his being a man. Sorry but men are connected to their manhood and view their ability to be 'A Man' based upon the functionality and even the size of their, um, endowments.
I would suggest letting it slide for a while, help him to relax, take his mind off of other problems and stressors (Stressor = Stress and Pressure) If the job or finances or other family members are a source of woe for him, then helping him to forget or even work through those may lead to a more successful outcome in bed.
Most of sex takes place in the brain, meaning that the thrill and pleasure are going on in the head - no where else - if other things are intruding during sex, then sex will not take place - deal with other things, try meditation, throw in a 'movie' prior - get him 'hot and bothered' and his mind off of other potential stressors and he may be able to perform better.
If this is over the potential problems of being a 'daddy' then you need to fish around and figure out for him if his feelings about fatherhood could be a stress point. Without knowing the man I can't tell you where to start. Most likely you need to voice your concerns about the potential problems you see for yourself being a mommy - things like 'What if I drop the baby on its head?', 'What if I fail to breast feed?' 'What if we can't afford to put the kid through college?' - I think you can think of enough.
Communicate some of your worries and ask him if he has any. The attempt here is not to focus on your issues, but to get him to talk about his by attempting to 'reassure' you that he too has these kinds of thoughts.
If you feel you can't do this, or you try and get nothing then you need to consider therapy for both of you.
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