Try love and acceptance.

i think a mother already knows. mothers love thyre sons no matter what

You're in the Armed Forces? Anyways back with my answer, Support him, show him you love him no matter what, accept him for what he is. Doing positive things with your son shows you're a good father.

Thank you for your service in Iraq -- it must be hard to be concerned about family when you're far from home. I'm unclear from your post about what sort of help you might need -- is it that you're not sure how his mother should be informed or is it your own discomfort with his being gay? Or both?

First of all, thank you for your service to us, and to those that can't thank you for putting yourself in the fight to protect a future they will never see. weather I believe the war is just or not in neither here or there, the fact that we appreciate those in it is an absolute, gods speed, and may safe journey's bring you back home to us. Now, as to the dilemma, well I have not had any experience with having a gay relative, nor in being gay myself, but, just as there are support groups in any challenge of life, I am more than positive there is here for you too. I just went to Google and typed in "parents of gays support group" and got plenty for one to investigate, and or contact for help. This is an age-old situation, and weather one likes it or not, there it is before one, and because we love them so much, we always want to do the right things for them as well. at the bottom is the URL for the search I made, so if you click on it, you will be taken there directly. I can only hope that this will help, and I wish you and yours the very best, and that they find you home safely soon and able to be there in not just these circumstances, but for all those to come. Bless you, and PEACE! http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&lr=&newwindow=1&safe=off&q=parents+of+gays+support+group&btnG=Search

What if you never saw him again?

If you have internet access, I would suggest Googling PFLAG, which is Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays. This may be useful. Really, there isn't anything for you to "do", you have about as much control over his being gay as he does over your heterosexuality. I would suggest being a good listener, being loving, be accepting. Finally, although I vehemently disagree with the occupation of Iraq and am disgusted by the greed and avarice of the present Administration, I wish you the very best and it is my fervent wish that you return safely to your loved ones.

Thank you for your service in Iraq. You might find the organization Parents Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays helpful: http://www.pflag.org/

Thank you, man. Don't worry about him now, you have a much more serious situation around you right now. If he is, you can't stop it, only you will drive him away. It just may be an experiment for him right now or he may just be trying to get attention. Pretend you don't know about it for now and keep the eyes in the back of your head open and keep em' downwind. God bless you, Man! Keep cool in that damned place!

First, let me add my voice to those thanking you for your service over there. It's guys like you who are keeping the enemy from coming here. Ultimately, your stepson hasn't changed. He's still the same great kid you knew before you left, except that instead of checking out the pretty girls, he's checking out the other guys. I'm with those who suggest joining PFLAG. They'll help you through it.

THANK U FOR UR SERVICE...i have many friends and few relatives over in Iraq with u. what i want to say is this, ur his step dad. he trusted u with important information. DO NOT TELL HIS MOM. instead tell him to tell his mom. u do not want to ruin that trust (from one step kid to another i know what he must be feeling as the step kid) he told u maybe to tell his mom or to see if he could trust u. what u should do is email him and tell him u not only support his decision but respect him enough not to tell his mom and if he wants his mom to know he should be the one to tell him.

Love and support him as you always have. He's still your son, and there's not a thing wrong with his being gay. I would suspect mom may already have a suspicion. May God watch over you and bring you home safely!

I agree with Jeff the Go Go's fan, but I also want to give you a thank you for all you and your family have given me by going to Iraq. Such a sacrifice cannot easily be repaid. I will find ways to pay it forward. That is my promise to you. Thank you.

I don't understand- is being gay a bad thing? what is there to handle? if anything, there might be something to handle if he was 17, and got some girl pregnant. but you don't need to worry about that, do you?

Man of Steel and Velvet by Aubrey Andelin http://www.fascinatingwomanhood.net/books/bookshlf.php