Changing your thoughts and reactions is one of the hardest things to do, but it's the way to accept and love yourself. . If you've had a rough past, know that that's not YOU, and let go of thinking of that story. If the memories arise, know that the people who were unkind to you were insensitive to the pain they were causing you. They were either doing the best they could with what they had, or they were repeating what they'd learned, or were projecting their self-hatred outwards as a way of making themselves feel superior and better. See good for them, send good thoughts and blessings their way, see them happy, and let them go, and let their effects on you go. . If you don't like things about the way you're behaving, stop them. If you're into booze or drugs, get help (AA is great). Stop hanging around with people who keep you in that lifestyle. Find new, positive friends. Join organizations or volunteer somewhere to meet good-quality people. Don't just read that and think "Sounds good, but..."; write down positive concrete steps you can take to break away from negative influences and get into positive new things. . It sounds hokey, but repeat "affirmations" to yourself. Bookstores have books on this subject - how to think positive thoughts about yourself, with examples. Post them where you'll see them, and, every day, repeat the truth about yourself until it seeps into your consciousness and subconscious. . Every day, sit quietly for a while. Start with 5 minutes, and add 2 or 3 minutes a week. Read a little of something that inspires you - the Psalms or a book from the library or bookstore ("Quiet Talks with the Master" by Eva Werber from DeVorss Press, wwww.devorss.com, is a wonderful, warm, reassuring book that evokes love and peace). Then sit quietly for a while and absorb it. If negative thoughts intrude, turn your mind away from them - this is hard at first, but gets easier with time. When your 10 minutes is up, you'll realize that you've spent time in a different mindset, a different consciousness, and that it felt SOOOOOO much better than what you're used to. . This sounds hokey, too, but take a piece of paper, and write down things you don't like about your life. Next to each, write down concrete steps you can take to release or overcome these things. Then write down a list of the things you do like and love, and why. Next to each, write down "Thank you!", and notes on how to increase them in your life. Finally, write down things that aren't currently in your life that you'd love to see. Next to each, write "Thank you in advance!", and steps you'll take to achieve them. . Post the above sheet on your fridge and read it every day. Please. . I'm sure there are lots of good churches out there, but Unity (which isn't Unitarianism, although they're cool too) and Religious Science (which isn't Christian Science or Scientology) (and which can also go by the name "Science of Mind"; I'm not sure of the distinction) are non-dogmatic, loving, and accepting of anyone. They teach positive ways to change your life by changing your thoughts, and how to increase love and good in your life. If you don't like the first one you try after a few services, try another. . You might need medical help - see your primary care doctor first. It might be "depression", which is the medical term that covers even things like major stress affecting your mood. They can prescribe "anti-depressants", which is a semi-scary and stigmatized term, but which can really really help. I was overwhelmed with major stress from my job a few years ago, probably coupled with natural effects from getting older, and started taking a low dose of an SSRI (selective serotonin re-uptake inhibitor), which keeps the brain from reabsorbing too much naturally-produced serotonin, which is a natural mood-enhancer. Or you might need counseling of some sort - I don't have any experience here, but talk to your doctor. . Good luck, Broody - I'll keep you in my prayers and see the absolute greatest best for you.

The answer above is so great and I dont have much to add to these good things mentioned above. The thing I can add is to tell you that everything is possible if you really want it. It's never too late to start a fresh beginning. we can always start all over! we are human beings and may have mistakes, maybe horrible ones, but this never means that we dont deserve a fresh beginning. And remember, if you dont love yourself, you cannot love anyone else. I recommend you to read the book by Robin Sharma - The Greatness Guide and the book by Rhonda Byrne- The Secret. These books are really helpful and may be yor friends in your journey to loving yourself.

Start by appreciating the good things in you, there is always something. I did it, you can too. If you start doing things in a loving way (you may ask yourself= what would be the loving thing to do?). Then you must acknowledge the good feeling that you experience from this positive actions. You wont see yourself as a bad person. That other person is not your true self, only love is true.

You must first understand that whatever you did, it might have had the consequence of hurting people. You must accept that as a mistake that anyone could have made. You must accept the fact. That is the hardest part in the process. I know people who choose to not accept the fact that they did something wrong. They must accept that and move on with their lives. You did something wrong, but you are ABLE TO CHANGE IT BACK. You can't turn time, but you can change yourself, make a good impression in others, and help them to get over what the consequences were. By helping them, you help yourself, and help others. Good luck. I wish you the best in life. Make the rest of your life kickass, and have fun.