Actually hers is the only opinion that matters on this issue, sorry.

Its simple if you would not normally get a lap dance at a strip club when accompanied by your wife then yes it is cheating, because its the state of mind that is at issue here. Your in the clear if you would take your wife to a strip club and get a lap dance and she has no beef, but it sounds like there is plenty of beef here if you are asking

Yes, your girlfriend is the boss- or at least trying to be. What she says is law- you have to prove her wrong- that is the way you are acting.

If you were at a strip cub and your wife/gf know you were there they she as to except some sort of touching goin on at least i would. Have you told her maybe if you told her what went on then you could relax more about what happened. I would only think of it as cheating if you went looking for the stripper or it starts interfearing with your home life.

What a crock of poo!!!... as long as your zipper stays up ...NO FOUL... the ONLY/only real look out is if she manages to pass you a dose of crabs which you then take to your honeymoon bed, in most bach party lapdances, someone else PAYS the girl to perform ... not the groom... ...therefor the Bride MIGHT have a few words for the bestman who plans the bach-party . Save the word "Cheating" for the real thing... coitus, BJ's, and the attempt to engage in such. PLZ get real!!

Intent. what were your actual intentions, with the lap dance? what did you want to do? if you felt guilty, and are asking this question, apparently your conscience is bother you. Its all a matter of how you believe your wife or girfriend would feel, if she walked into this situation, while it was in progress. Think about it.........

yep - it's definitely cheating. doesn't matter that it's a bachelor party. strip clubs are for seeing women strip. lap dancing clubs are where you get a lap dance. if you get a lap dance at a strip club - that's cheating. it's like rolling a 5, a 5, and a 6, attacking Kazackstan, and collecting £200 for passing GO or accusing Proffesor Plum, in the Lounge with the Revolver, and getting a double letter score on the v and 50 extra points for using all your letters.

I would say "yes" ... I just got married to a guy who had a lap dance a few hours before we were married... this is something I never thought he would do and now I am thinking I made a huge mistake. I am very hurt...He said it was no different than going to see "Zumanity".. now that is a good one!!!

I just don't understand how it is ever okay for a man about to get married or in a committed relationship of any kind to have a naked woman rubbing her body all over him and sticking her boobs and ass right in his face. If he were at a bar and met a girl and took her home and stayed fully clothed, but she got naked and rubbed her body all over him would that be okay? Just because he or someone else is paying someone to do it makes it okay? I don't get it. If a man walks in on his wife and a naked man is rubbing all over her, does that make it okay if she is clothed and not actively having sex with him? I think any man would freak out about that.

Have any of you gals out there ever been to a place where the guys dance? A friend of mine bartended at a club like that and he said the women were 10 times more crazy than guys at a strip club. Is that chesting gals?

It is emotionally cheating. It is fantasizing about another woman just not having intercourse. Intercourse is the technical form of cheating... but robbing your wife (or partner) of her respect and dignity and giving the attention that belongs to her to another woman is cheating in my book.

If its a bachelor party, I think its a little more acceptable. However, this also depends on the kind of "lapdance" you're getting. Some people get lapdances for their bachelor party during which they practically have sex with the stripper in the VIP area, those are NOT acceptable and yes they are cheating. If its an innocent little lap dance then I suppose there is nothing wrong with it.

If the guy feels guilty for doing it, yeah, it's cheating. If he wouldn't do it in front of her, it's probably cheating.

Isn't it like having sex with clothes on.. well the man would have the clothes on? I don't know why a man who has a girlfriend or a wife would want to get a lap dance when they can go all the way with their female lover.

I don't even go to those places when I'm single, I certainly wouldn't go there while spoken for, so yes, I would say it is. And my friends can call me a pu**y all they want, if any of them ever grows the balls to say that and mean it in front of me;)

No,it is just innocent fun,and accepted by all.

Any type of sexual interaction with anyone other than your girlfriend/boyfriend/wife/husband is wrong, and the exchange of money can make it even worse. You're actually PAYING to cheat?! O, well that makes it ok then?! Ridiculous! Yes it IS cheating if you are in any kind of committed relationship and i dont c how its considered acceptable at a bachelor party. If the need is that great, to have "one last fling" or sexual interaction with another woman before you get married, maybe you shouldn't be getting married at all because if you truly loved your fiance enough to marry her, you wouldn't even WANT anyone else in that way. Do you really need a "free pass" before you get "tied down"? If thats the way you view married life then why are you even bothering with it at all? I don't understand it at all.

My lord there are alot of uptight people! I think a BP lap dance is a right of passage. I had no worries that my hubby went to a strip club nor did I care that he was going to have lap dances. There are going to be temptation everyday and you have to trust the person you are marrying to make good choices. A lap dance that is just a lap dance should be fine as long as your clothes stayed on. Let me tell you that male dancers are far more physical than most of their female counterparts. If she is upset ask her to go to a club with you and get her one.

It's obvious that there is no black and white answer when it comes to this topic. I belive both men and women have a wide range of definitions of cheating. Ultmately it comes down to the individual relationship. If your significant other has an issue with it than you should too. Communication is key though. Find out before rather than after whether your bf/gf/wife or husband has any issues with you getting a lap dance. Everyone is different but ultimately it only matters what the person you are in a relationship with thinks. I found this out the hard way. I assumed she would be okay with it and she wasn't. I should have asked.

Anything you wouldn't do in front of your partner is cheating. IS a lap dance really worth ruining your relationship? In most cases it's a bunch of guys who feel the need to impress each other, be a man, take the high road and respect your wife or gf by not going to the strip club in the first place. They should be out-lawed all together.

i wouldnt be mad at you

Anything that you wouldn't do infront of your partner is cheating. Or anything that you wouldn't want your partner to do. At least that's how I see it.

Would it build trust in your relationship? Would you want your wife going out and giving lap dances?

Anybody who answered this question by saying that lapdances are not cheating are akin to the kids in high school who do drugs and try to get their friends to do them too. It is not ok. It IS cheating. Anybody who says differently just wants some company down in the moral gutter in which they themselves live. Take the high road - don't cheat - and don't listen to the low-lives of the world who try to convice you that it is normal and not wrong.

yes

While it's not necessarily FAIR to receive one, it's pretty much tradition nowadays, and should not be looked at as cheating. It also depends. If the girl came up to you, or your friends basically forced the lap dance on you, it shouldn't be something to be worried about, however if it was something where the guy was at the bachelor party, and was like, ohh well I got an excuse so I'ma get this lap dance... that would be wrong, and the soon to be wife would have a reason to be upset.

If your partner thinks it is, then yes. If not, then no.

I dont really thihk it is cheating but I wouldnt want my man doing it. The thought of another female in his lap......

In my opinion, yes. I recently found out my bf of several years has been getting them "frequently" throughout our relationship. I had no idea. I WILL NEVER TRULY TRUST HIM AGAIN.

hell yeah!

Of course not. I am sure your gf or wife won't mind at all. Just ask her..........

I would not like if my boyfriend did that. I don't know if I would consider it cheating, but I would not be comfortable knowing my boyfriend had a choice of getting a lap dance and chose to knowing that I would not like it. I mean if I let him go to the strip club you would think that would be good enough, and he should respect me.

It is cheating if the fiance tells you no ahead of time. This recently terminated my wedding 5 days before hand Guys be careful

No but I would consider it a fight between you and your s/o!!!

No, my fiance quite liked the fact that I was getting one. (oh, were you asking if he got one?).

I cannot tell you whether this is cheating or not, but as a wife who just found out that her husband has been doing this periodically for several years, I can tell you that it's ripping me apart inside. I never thought I'd feel this way. It seems innocent at first, but a lap dance is a form of sexual contact. My husband and another woman's gentitals rubbed each other, she touched his crotch and he touched her bare breasts. I have no guarantee that he won't do it again either.

depends if he likes it or not... all i know is.. i'd be SO MAD! like SadWife said... genital to genital contact (even with clothes on) ... makes me upset thinking about it.

Yes, if you lie about it to your loved one, and feel embarrased about it, or guilty then you cheated.

I always thought it was cheating, but I have a question for you.. My husband has a single friend who is having 2 bachelor parties. . One in Amsterdam and one n Vegas.. Each bachelor party is going to be 4 days long.. He says his friends will give him a very hard time, even those who did not go to his, (and I begged him not to go to a strip club at his own party in New Orleans and I believe him when he says he did not go into one.. But his friends did pressure him when out of my ear shot to still go and they would cover for him)..So if his friends give him a hard time here or if he goes to Vegas and does not set foot inside a club, I feel guilty.. He thinks it is because I don't trust him to go into one. He will be 40 in a few months.. If a girl is 18 she could pass as his daughter. I'm not content with thinking about another womans crotch or breasts inmy husbands face for four days.. I'm being pressured as he is apparently the only one not going and he says the other wives don't have a problem with this.. I have lost sleep.. Am I wrong??

I always thought it was cheating, but I have a question for you.. My husband has a single friend who is having 2 bachelor parties. . One in Amsterdam and one n Vegas.. Each bachelor party is going to be 4 days long.. He says his friends will give him a very hard time, even those who did not go to his, (and I begged him not to go to a strip club at his own party in New Orleans and I believe him when he says he did not go into one.. But his friends did pressure him when out of my ear shot to still go and they would cover for him)..So if his friends give him a hard time here or if he goes to Vegas and does not set foot inside a club, I feel guilty.. He thinks it is because I don't trust him to go into one. He will be 40 in a few months.. If a girl is 18 she could pass as his daughter. I'm not content with thinking about another womans crotch or breasts inmy husbands face for four days.. I'm being pressured as he is apparently the only one not going and he says the other wives don't have a problem with this.. I have lost sleep.. Am I wrong?? 0 Pts Rate Answer Flag this answer Nonsense Spam/Offensive Comments (be the first to comment)

IF YOU HAVE TO SAY THE DANCE WAS FORCED ON YOU LEAVE YOUR BALLS AT THE DOOR.

ACTUALLY IF YOU CLAIM YOU WERE FORCED TO ACCEPT THE LAP DANCE YOU ALREADY HAVE LEFT YOUR BALLS AT THE DOOR. FRIGGIN WIMPS

Probably.

No, why should it be? I never get why other girls get bothered by strip clubs. Getting a lap dance is hardly a big deal - enjoy yourself.

You ask as if there is a right answer. It's not something I'd do (i mean have done for me), but my opinion doesn't count. You'd better ask your partner (I assume you have one or cheating is meaningless) what she thinks.

I wouldn't waste my money, but no, that is not cheating

Nah. But, really, the question here is....Do you? Does your partner?