How could you motivate and tell your boyfriend he REALLY needs to start looking for a job without stating thee obvious of how he needs to work?
by 
Disko Fari
ANSWERS: 7
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Look...I dont know the situation..but I helped my husband to get a job...He was so frustrated as he wasnt getting one....I gave him constant mental support and suggested him options and asked to decide....
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Honestly, I would be very straightforward about it.
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Does he want a job? You obviously want him to have a job. So ask him if he want to work. If he says "yes", ask if you can help him find work. If he says "no", then drop the subject...and consider dropping the guy (unless you're happy supporting him). Please recognize you are telling us what you want, not what he wants. Until he decides he wants to work, he won't do it. It is, after all, his decision. It then becomes your decision if you want to be in a relationship with someone who is not motivated to work.
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Start looking? You mean he`s unemployed and he hasn`t even started looking yet? It`s one thing to be unemployed but another to not even be looking. Doesn`t sound like he`s trying hard enough. Tell him you only make enough for yourself and he needs to pay his way.
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Tell him, indirectly, by denying him sex. And disable the internet so he can't look at porn (sorry dude). He will work, and soon. Maybe reward him when he goes through a few interviews if finding one proves tough and your resolve to withhold affection is weak.
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When you cook just serve yourself a nice plate and put on his a plate just a hot dog with some mustard on it. My point is, dear Smile, that you need to "state the obvious". Having a job gives me a sense of pride, then that entitled me to hold my head up and my opinion and/or input in that house is just as good and equally important as hers. It doesn't look good when a woman need to "motivate" her man to do what he should be doing on his own.
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Chances are, he already knows he needs to work and he either: A) Has no desire to be responsible at this point in time or B) He wants to work but isn't able to pin something down due to lack of work available or C) He's waiting for "the perfect job" All you can do as his lady, is support him in trying to look for work and/or help by going through classifieds, searching internet sites for job listings and share options with him that you think he'd be good for. You can only help and assist but NEVER shove. He's only going to work when HE wants it, and having been with my share of "laid back" slackers, I am more than aware of this fact. Good luck : )
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