ANSWERS: 4
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Stick to the truth. The reason his father isn't around any more is because he hurt you and you are worried about him hurting your son too. Tell your son that it will be OK. For your son's sake you need to have some sort of stability. You can't have him hearing one thing from you, and another thing from his father - that will be confusing and painful. Contact must end with his father until such a time when his father is not abusive and not going to act in a way that will harm your child (including saying that you will be together again).
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Its best if you dont insult your ex. because as much as he hurt you, it is HER father, and you can explain to her fully why you left him later on. For now, just tell him that you and him dont agree on some big things and that its important that you and him both take time to work out your own life, etc. If he asks if you are getting back together, say no. And let your ex know that it isnt okay for him to get his hopes up like that. Not really a good situtuation to be in. Good luck! ~+~
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I wouldn't tell an 8 year old the exact truth. That's too much to put on such a youngster. Also, you don't want to give him any complexes or make him have such horrible thoughts of the other parent, no matter how wrong & awful that parent is. I would just say something like 'Some times things just don't work out, & that's o.k. , Mommy & Daddy still love you very much & that will never change. When you're older you'll understand this more.' That's what worked for me.
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See a counsellor and read parenting books revolving around divorce. Honestly, they both help SO much.
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