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by The Chief on July 10th, 2008
I agree that it takes two to tango, BUT...
The cheater bears ultimate responsibility for his/her actions, with respect to their given word.
For example, if I were to cheat on my wife, then the violation of the vows I swore on my honor is MY fault and the dishonor would be MINE.
It makes NO DIFFERENCE whether or not the other person knew if I was married or not. Ultimately I am the ONLY one who can cheat on my wife. And as the owner of my penis, I have the ultimate say in where it goes.
In the end, your word is your bond and the only thing that really has any meaning. If you will not keep that trust, then you are without honor. You cannot share the blame for that with others.
by Mentalmum is back on April 10th, 2008
Both are to blame, unless one didnt know the other was married.
by Sweet T on April 10th, 2008
I believe that the cheater, is the one in a relationship, so he/she is to blame. The one they are cheating with, most times are lied to, about them being married.
by Wide Awake @ has closing date woo hoo on April 10th, 2008
Both the cheater and the other adulterer are equally bad. It takes two to cheat, you know.
by Jade on April 10th, 2008
They are both responsible, unless the person they are cheating with does not know about the marriage.
by Smart2 is back! Did you miss me? on April 10th, 2008
I agree with most answers here in that the married person is more to blame, as the other party is usually lied to about the circumstances. Now if both parties in the affair are married, I would place blame equally.
by Sheriff Raff -Answerhag on April 10th, 2008
i think the should both be taken outside the city and stoned
by Gideon on April 10th, 2008
Assuming the single person knows their lover is married, they are equally responsible.
by spalpeen20 on September 12th, 2008
Both since they are both accessories of the crime..one cannot do it without the other. Whether the other one doesn't know that the person he/she is having an affair with is married or already committed to someone else. It's his/her responsibility to know very well the person he/she is getting involved with. Ignorance is not excuse.
by Arisztid on April 10th, 2008
Assuming that the person they are cheating with knows that the partner is cheating, BOTH are equally responsible.
However, sometimes the person who is married does not tell the partner that they are married and makes excuses for not being available all the time, such as being out of town frequently on business.
by Rince on April 10th, 2008
It takes two, both are to blame :-)
by TAPriceCTR s son is wearing his COAT on October 26th, 2008
I will never understand why people assign blame to the person the cheater is cheating with. unless they are a friend they have NO loyalty to the cheaters SO and as such have betrayed noone (they are not a nice person, but most people aren't) they cheater is the only person who has betrayed.
by Anonymous on October 23rd, 2008
In my case I cheated 15yrs ago and I recently found out my husband had an online affair for about 4yrs. I blame myself for both. I think he may not have done it if I had not ruined the trust between us to begin with. I cheated because I had convinced myself he no longer wanted me around. His cheating came about because he didnt feel he could ask me to sex talk with him. I made him feel the need to look elsewhere for comfort and I take full responsability for that. Ultimately I set the tone for how our lives would be because I was selfish 15yrs ago. Now I will own up to my part in it all and hope someday to be forgiven and someday to forgive myself.
by purplepickleater on April 10th, 2008
lmao! This answer is going to make me a lot of friends!
while not the most at fault let's reserve a smidgen of the blame for the person who is being cheated on.
by R U Sirius on April 10th, 2008
I'd have to go with the Hotel clerk who gave them the key to the room.......What was he THINKING!!
by SoulFire on November 15th, 2009
Well in terms of the marriage and relationship it would be the cheating partner because the third/other person may not know the cheater is married. Also it is the cheater that chose to violate the agreement of marriage. The third/other person made no promise to the couple that they would not sleep with one of them.
That being said if the third person knew about the marriage it is cruel of them to cause a rift in the marriage.
So it is the cheater who is most responsible, in my opinion.
by Little Miss Sunshine on November 15th, 2008
The morality of the situation lies with the cheater not the one they are having an affair with.
by moobaa - feel like a duck on November 15th, 2008
the cheater as they have the commitment.
by Rinky Dinky Do on November 15th, 2008
The cheating person without a doubt. It's not the other person's problem
by Sunshine on October 26th, 2008
The cheating partner!! Unless the "other person" is your friend. But I hate people (especially) girls that always blame the "other person" and let there bf off the hook. What's up with that? I put my trust in my husband.
by ings123 on October 26th, 2008
defenatly the cheating partner is to blame coz he's breaking his promise and vows to his/her partner.
The person he/she is cheating with doesnt have anything to lose, whereas the cheating partner could lose everything.
by Carpediem COAT ab imo pectore on August 2nd, 2008
Both are responsible if they both had knowledge of each others situation. If the one they are cheating with did not know about the others situation, then it would solely be the cheaters responsibility.
by Jeanny on July 9th, 2008
It takes two to tango...
by Piggle on July 9th, 2008
They are both as despicable as each other.
by starrrgazer on July 8th, 2008
They are equally responsible for the affair. HOWEVER, I can not change anything about the other woman. She would not concern me. My concern is with my husband and our relationship. That is and must be the focus.
by what on April 10th, 2008
Both.
by DA BEN DAN yanggui zi on April 10th, 2008
the partner who is the one cheating..they are the one who made the commitment not to cheat..it is odd though that our first instinct is to blame the person who they cheated with.
by asweetguy4u2know saya R.I.P Nelson on April 10th, 2008
I think the cheater and the other woman/man are equally responsible unless the other person has been lied to and not informed that they are screwing a married or otherwise involved person.
The other person if they are aware that they are involved with a married or comitted person is just as guilty as the cheater for allowing themselves to stoop so low as to allow themselves to be the other person.
Whatever happened to the good old days where people had morals and values and this sort of stuff was very uncommon. It seems like cheating is becoming more and mnore acceptable with each passing generation and I think it's totally disgusting.
by Beer Nuts on April 10th, 2008
I think both are equally to blame if the person that is being cheated WITH knows that their lover is married/with someone. Otherwise it is all on the cheater.
by B. Krayzee - Dirrty Professor @ Large on April 10th, 2008
it takes 2 to tango!
both participants are equally responsible!
by Sexyrabbit on April 10th, 2008
CHEATING PARTNER
by JustCurious on April 10th, 2008
the cheating partner unless the other person is married too. Then they are both equally in the wrong.
by babolos on April 10th, 2008
they are both sinners. the cheating partner has a responsibility for the spouse, though
by Mrs.Dufresne on November 16th, 2009
The cheating partner that has betrayed the emotional investment.
+5
by grayghost on November 16th, 2009
The one that is cheating ,lets say a man and women are together. and man gos out and finds that a women is want to take hem hme and he gos he is the one that is doing wrong.and if he does it to you he will do it to her.what will he not
by roiboysatx on October 13th, 2009
both are guilty, but the cheating partner is more responsible, he or she is breaking their vows and trust.
by anothergrl on August 26th, 2009
Well it depends if the other person even knows if that person is married or commited. If they do, then they are just as irresponsible as the cheater.... makes them even worst knowing that they are destroying a marriage or relationship. Whatever the cheater gets is deserved.
by Catch22 on August 11th, 2009
Did you ever stop to think it was you... your partner cheated for a reason...
by Touch_of_The_Masters_Hand on July 30th, 2009
I would say the person cheating. Often the person they are cheating with is clueless that they already have a spouse/s/o and often don't find out til sometimes years and years into the relationship because they are such good liars
by Anon y mouse on January 6th, 2009
The person that cheats is responsible for their own behaviour. The person in the affair with them, is not responsible for someone elses actions, only their own, assuming that they are both adults.
by RosieGHM Jetpacker on January 2nd, 2009
Who made the first move? The cheating partner and the willing participant are equally guilty...the partner for betraying his/her S/O and the one who engages in the cheating knowing that this person is in a committed relationship...they are both liars, immoral and untrustworthy..a very slight edge of blame rests on the instigator..the one who made the move to begin with..but just a very slight edge. They're both worthless material as far as other relationships are concerned. If they'll do it with you they'll do it to you! :)
by AnonymousGirl on November 15th, 2008
Honestly, I think that the cheater, the person helping the cheater, and the person being cheated on are all to blame. I can say this because I have been cheated on. I know this answer will probably not be liked by many, but it's true. Let's stop with this "I'm gonna point my self-righteous finger at the cheater and act like he/she is the only one who did anything wrong." It's pathetic. Cheaters are people, too, and shouldn't be cast into the pits of hell by other people who have done wrong to others themselves. 'Let him who is without sin cast the first stone'. Wasn't it Jesus who said that or something like it? Well, it's very good advice. =]
by Tonshea on November 15th, 2008
Both because it takes two
by ALM4 on October 24th, 2008
the cheater..
by Digitalbum on October 14th, 2008
If they both know then both of them.
by Stridar on October 14th, 2008
The person they are cheating with may not know the complete story. However show no mercy when it comes to the cheating partner, they knew *exactly* what they were doing.
by SAMMIESOSO on October 14th, 2008
They are both to blame. My own situation, my husband of 23 years has cheated on me multiple times all with women he works with. They know he's married with children, they have met and talked with me. One he got pregnant and he paid for her abortion. It would not matter if he got sex every day 3 times a day at home, as long as there are woman that don't care about their actions or themselves and will give it up just for the thrill of doing it in the Restaurant storage room or parking lot it will happen. He's a manager and she/they are servers and if they found out at work he would loose his job. He does not care about his job or family it's the thrill for the both of them. He has more to loose then she does. She could say NO!! just like he could. It's all about your choices.
by GoddessOfTheUniverse on October 11th, 2008
The cheating partner of course!!
:):)
by Janie on October 11th, 2008
the person they are cheating shouldnt even be brought into it... after all, they have no responsibility in the matter.
by BettyMc on October 4th, 2008
Both,it depends on the circumstances who is more to blame.
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Comments
I love the owner of my penis comment! Good answer!
by Wickels on September 5th, 2008
Thank you! It kind of goes with how I was raised. That whole thing about taking personal responsibility, regardless of what others say or do.
by The Chief on September 5th, 2008
Brillantly said!
by shammers still slogging along on October 3rd, 2008
Thank you!
by The Chief on October 4th, 2008
Great answer, but . . . not everyone is perfect.
by AnonymousGirl on November 15th, 2008
I never said anybody was perfect. Merely that one who cheats on ones spouse has no honor.
.
This is not to say that one cannot recover one's honor. But honor is like trust. You must continually be worthy of it, because it only takes ONE screw up to lose it. Once you lose it, it's a LONG battle to regain it.
.
I learned a phrase in the Navy applicable here: It only takes one "Aw, sh*t" to destroy a thousand atta-boys.
.
Honor is precious. It doesn't come cheap, but it only takes one cheap act to destroy it.
by The Chief on November 15th, 2008
That's a great quote, and a great comment in general. :D
by AnonymousGirl on November 16th, 2008
Thank you! I really appreciate that.
by The Chief on November 16th, 2008
You're welcome. :D
by AnonymousGirl on November 16th, 2008