It's never too late to choose to be anything.

People can choose to have whatever types of sexual encounters they want to. Having sex with a person of your same sex, however, doesn't make you gay. Your natural preferences determine your sexual orientation. You are the only one who knows what your natural preferences are.

Your understanding is simply wrong. You can't chose to be gay, you are born gay, altough you notice it between about 12 and 18. This is not a theory, it is based on dozens of surveys and evidences. I'm normally very tolerant with what people believe, but in this case, I have to tell you that your wrong, because some people believe it's a sin to be gay, and they say gay people go to hell for that.

You can choose what you do, but you can't choose who you are. I can't be attracted to men and I can't stop being attracted to women. I'd assume the only time you have a 'choice' would be if you were bisexual.

Seems like you've already made the choice. Happy 50th, whenever that may be!

You can choose your sexual partners and you can choose the lifestyle you wish to live.Who cares what you call yourself?

Sexual orientation is NOT a choice. There have been chromosonal differences among homosexual people. It is possible to be heterosexual and participate in homosexual behaviors, as it is possible to live your life heterosexually, denying your homosexual preference. If you have strong feelings regarding your current orientation, I suggest you not label yourself as anything but... However, if you have an urge to experiment in homosexual activities, that would be between you, your current husband/wife, and a willing participant. In that case no, it wouldn't be too late to experiment. Some homosexuals do not "come out" until mid-life or later (if at all) because they have repressed their urges due to familial standards, religion, or any other number of reasons. That could be a possibility for you. If your urges continue, perhaps consider counseling to help you work through your thought process. Good luck!

Sorry this is my second answer, for some reason it doesn't let me post long comments. You ask why so many people tell you this: I know that many people think being gay is a choice, and it makes me mad. But that doesn't mean they're right. Sadly, peopl often believe what they are taught. Especially the church says that being gay is a choice. But important is what science says. Let's compare it to global warming: Global warming is a theory, there are thousands of scientist that think global warming is because of humans, but there are also thousands that say it is natural and not our fault. But if you look what science says about being gay, you will see that there are nearly ZERO scientists that say it's a choice. You can look up surveys and evidences. Additionally, think about the following stuff: You are straight, if your sexual orientation was a choice, you should theoretically be able to choose to be gay. But this would mean, that every man was bi-sexual! And if you think about having sex with another man, do you find this attractive? Imagine kissing other mens. It doens't work! And also, WHY would someone choose to be gay? Society is against gay people, the church tells them it's wrong and they go to hell for that, so why would someone choose to be gay? I have a very religious friend, a stupid pastor told him he would go to hell, but my friend is gay and he can't change it.

You say you've always been straight, no question...and you understand it's not a choice. That being said, why would you then ask if it's too late to choose? Do you not see that you contradict yourself? It is NOT A CHOICE! Unless you are actually attracted to the same gender, then you are not gay. If you are attracted to both, then you are bisexual. If you are attracted to only the opposite gender, then you are straight. It's not really that hard...cut and dried. I never made any choice. I have always been attracted to women, and there is no question that I'm a lesbian.

I think you are free to do whatever you like but I don't know how your wife will take it.

I don't know. I have never in my 59 years of being gay every known anyone who 'chose' to be gay. I guess you can be whatever you want..in the end it's all just friction.

Your "understanding" is wrong. Orientation is inborn, and not a "choice." However, I think this is an [excellent] tongue-in-cheek question, and for this I will applaud you and give you +4. :o)

You can make the choice, but be aware it comes with a full lifestyle change. That takes commitment. It's not just dating the same sex. You'll have to start listening to Madonna. A lot of it. And Cher. You need to perfect the greeting "Hey, girlfriend" with just the right tone. And that sway in the hips doesn't just create itself. If you're currently proficient in mechanics or any kind of construction, you'll have to give that up. You'll also have to start saving for cutting-edge fashion, tanning sessions and highlights. The choice is yours, but be ready for the work that comes with it. ;)

no one chooses ..you are or you are not gay/lesbian/bisexual....or straight, so if you think you can fool yourself into something that your not ...so be it ... but you will only be able to fool yourself for so long before you realise the thruth, so its up to you if you like lying to your self...do you?

I think that those who believe that it is a choice may be talking about the actions connected to it and the choice to identify with it. Personally, I see too much evidence suggesting that there are biological predispositions to homosexuality to think that it is something that can be chosen. Furthermore, even if it wasn't biological, it WOULD be psychological and sociological, and the choices that would lead to it may be so far disconnected that one may make the choices without ever knowing the consequences. That said, people who say that it is a choice are right in that you can choose to identify with homosexuality or whatever. That part IS a choice, and I can't see how you could debate otherwise. HOWEVER, I don't see any logic in identifying with something that isn't true to your heart. SO, is it too late for you to CHOOSE to be gay? NO, you could make that decision any day of your life. EVEN if you weren't gay, and you could live according to that decision too. The problem with that is that you would be choosing to live a lifestyle that isn't true to who you really are. Christians might say that we all do that to a degree. In my head, sometimes I'm an ass hole. I say mean things to people, and it's my true nature to think those things. I CHOOSE to keep those thoughts to myself and I try to be a nice person despite some of those thoughts. The question is, where do we draw the line? Do we let our true selves come out no matter how nasty others may think it is, or do we conform and hide who we really are? There's a balance, and like anything that should be balanced, you will find people on both extremes.

You have the potential to be a queer. But why on Earth would you want to do that?

I chose to be gay. In the past, I chose to start liking particular guys, and most recently, I chose to start liking a beautiful woman. I have always been attracted to men, but I met a wonderful woman and decided I wanted to be with her. I think everyone is beautiful anyways, so I just chose to think a little more about how beautiful she is. Do I find all women attractive? No. But I am in love with my girlfriend and she is hot!

I recently had the oportunity to see some gay porn, it is so gross to watch the things they do and they really don't look like they are enjoying what they are doing like heteros. I can't see why you would want to.

Well your understanding is skewed. Being gay is not a choice. You either naturally are or you're not. You can choose to have sex with people of your gender for pleasure, or to push the envelope or whatever, but choosing to do that or anything else you think will "make" you gay won't change you. You'll never end up gay if you didn't start out that way. *shrug*

Hmmm, I just hope that you then don't *choose* to become a woman. That might really tick your wife off.

First things first. Just exactly where did you get the "understanding the homosexuality is a choice"? That is simply not true, and any argument based on a faulty premise is automatically false, by definition.

There's no such thing as a gay lifestyle or straight lifestyle, gays and straights lead lives as varied as species in the rainforest. I adhere to the idea that sexuality is fluid and that most people at some time in their lives have some attraction to the opposite sex, it just manifests itself more strongly or totally in some more than others.

Well, it's not really fair to your wife, but if you can't help it, you can't help it.

Its my understanding that homosexuality is genetic. You either have it or you dont. It could be latent. You could bi sexual, latent bi sexual. if you arent gay, any contact will make you sick. It isnt something you learn. homosexuality is something you are.

I've never met anyone who is gay who "chose" to be gay. If you're not attracted to the same sex, why would you choose to be gay?

Ummm, If you are straight and married, I don't think you will make a good gay guy. But hey, to each his own.

I think you are just being a smart*ss...I choose to be heterosexual do to my upbringing..when i was a kid and had a crush on my basketball coach who was female i thought i had something evil in me and i wasnt right..i choose to be straight for 8 years..now i'am myself in which is a lesbian ..1st time in my life i felt like i wasnt pretending...so no it is not a choice to be your natural sexuality.

that argument stems from the fact religious people say its a choice, well..they say its a problem or a sin and you need fixin! but of course attraction is not a choice. even a straight man such as myself knows that. and you cannot blame people for being themselves, and if there was a god he certainly wouldnt be a homophobic one.

ack. homosexuality is NOT a choice.

Homosexuality is not a choice, but you should do what is going to make you happy. If you want to be with a woman, then go be with a woman. It is as simple as that. If you are not happy with your husband, then you should get a divorce.

yes, and you also missed out on the toaster oven and microwave giveaway. Unless you have more than one gerbil.

Homosexuality is as much of a choice as hair color. You can hide it, pretend it's other than what it is, and all that. No amount of peroxide will turn a brunette into a natural blonde though. it's all just pretending and doesn't change the facts.

Oh would you grow up and stop trolling, i mean really, you're in you mid-40's? i highly doubt that.

You can't choose to be gay :) you have to be born that way. But i have met other gay men who have had a false life with a family, wife and everything because they are so scared of what other people will think of them, primarily their family. No matter how hard i try i can't not be gay, it's not like an etcha sketch i can shake or start over. If you are you would of at least felt a little bit confused, confined and scared and had a little bit of an.. attraction to other men. If you do become gay, do it for you and not for anyone else, good luck.

It's only a choice if you are bisexual. People who are 100% gay or strait know that you can't possibly choose otherwise.

I think being gay is more like a temptation that some have stronger than others. To "choose to be gay" mean to give in to a strange and unnatural temptation(that for some reason, many think is normal). It really isn't something you want to try out, sort of like drugs.

You don't choose sexual orientation. If you aren't attracted to your own sex, you're not suddenly going to be now.