It sounds to me like he is still in love with his ex. Why would you lie about talking to your ex, unless you are doing something that is wrong? I dont think it is you that makes him miserable, I think he does that to his self. He isnt where he thinks he should be, so he is taking his bad choices out on you. I know it sounds stupid, but try not to take his words to heart. You need to move on, you deserve to have someone that respects you and wants to be with you, and dont settle for anything less than that.

It must be difficult but 5 years is a long time and maybe he still has feelings for her maybe he needed to clear the air and just be mates, it's really hard to leave someone you've been with for that long and not talk to them it's hard and you must be going through a really tough time, maybe if you talk to him instead of confronting him, try and keep it calm and ask questions so you know what was going on and to put your own mind at rest. If he refuses to speak to you unfortunatly only time will make things better. I wish i could help more and give you a hug. Good Luck

The best deffence is an offence! You put him in a corner, you gave him no choice. Men do have felings too. Five yrs is a long time to just put under the rug. If he could just forget that easy, he wouldn't be worth having. It might be better to be a bit more sensitive to his feelings, and remember no one like to be accused of anything, even when we are guilty as charged. Talk to him, ask, don't accuse, be his friend! You sound like you acted out of fear, because you really do care, make sure he knows that. Good luck.

It might be good for you to let go, unless you want to remain in this love triangle for a long time. Seems like he wants his ex very much. I would not think that he really loved you very much. He might have loved you some, but probably not very much.

make sure your evidence is solid. like you see it for yourself, or there are enough people telling you the same thing that it cant really be construed as being a rumor. you were right to ask him about it. im just not sure how you went about it that made him act the way he did. best of luck to you with that.

Is it really so bad that he was talking to his ex? You have to accept that they were together for a long time, they have a lot in common and may still have a few issues that need sorting out so that they can really truely move on. Just because he has been speaking to her, it doesn't mean that he wants to get back together with her or anything like that. You say that you "confronted" him. That is probably what has caused this reaction in him. If you had spoken to him about it and talked through any insecurities that this is causing you then you may have had a better reaction. I would suggest that you give him a bit of space and then ask to meet him so that you can both talk. Take it slowly and listen to what he has to say and express any concerns you have, Good luck

Busy yourself with other tasks. He isn't worth spending all this time worring about.

Thats a tuff one eunie, I know it hurts. rescue a puppy from the pound. you'll have saved a life a nd gotten unconditional love at the same time

Time has a way of healing all wounds. I had a similiar situation, and what helped me, was realizing that I was better off without the person. Anyone who would be so heartless and cold is not someone that is worthy of your time. He does not care about you or your feelings, otherwise he would have ended things differently. It is just plain cruel to tell you that he was "miserable" with you and cut things off cold. Know that you are much better off without a person like that in your life. I say move forward, and don't contact him in any way. That's what he wants you to do. Just as sure as I type this, if you leave him alone and don't write him, he will start to wonder what is going on with you. He will contact you again one day, especially when he finds out that you are not tripping on him. You may still hurt inside, but don't let him know that it's getting to you. Surround yourself with friends, family, and support. Get involved with some activities (i.e. join a gyn, join a scrapbooking club, etc.) Try to stay busy so that you don't think about him. If you even get tempted to call him, call your friends instead. In time, it will get better. Just keep telling yourself that you deserve much more. You are worthy of true happiness.

Sounds like he used you to make his ex jealous - sounds like it worked. Don't beat yourself up about it - No one needs to be second best to anyone and I don't care who they are. It's first place or no place! Love yourself more than that.

If you are telling the absolute truth and your suspicions are correct, it sounds to me like you should break up with him. How did you find out he was talking to his ex anyway?

I'll be gentle but here's the straight answer. If he treats you like that, he might not be mean or nasty or trying to be hurtful- he might not be as crazy about you as you thought. Or he might be a Jerk. Either way you are better off!

If he was using you to make his Ex jelous, that makes him a real jerk. If he's telling you that you make him misriable??? That makes him an ignorant boyfriend. You deserve better. It will take time, and a good ammount of ice cream, but there is a man out there that will treat you the way you should be treated. Good luck, dear. If he wants to be a jerk, leave him to be a jerk by himself.

More or less the same thing happened to me. I found out he was talking to his ex, he told me nothing would EVER happen between them... he was over her and completely in love with me. He then left me to "figure things out" with her, and then came back to me saying he made a huge mistake. Don't stay with a guy that is trying to get over an ex... especially one that he had been with for that long. If he hasn't let go by now, he probably won't for a long time and you don't want to be the one in the middle of the situation. Trust me. You don't want to be in a relationship where you are trying to convince someone to be with you or to get over another person. You will get hurt over and over again. Move on as best you can. You will find happiness with someone else eventually and the hurt will fade day by day.

You have better things to do than sit around and wait for his call. Live your life without him. Perhaps he hit the wrong speed dial number on his phone. Note that no message was left. It sounds like you are better off without this loser. Go out and do some fun things with your friends to help forget him.