Snap, crackle and pop.

For the last time I will NOT go out with you! This is getting annoying now.

Still Cookie Flip.

What's a ramdom question?

Zeeky Boogy Doog!

The Great Smoke Off by Shel Silverstein, from the album "Songs and Stories" Now in the laid-back California town of sunny San Rafael Lived a girl named Pearly Sweetcake - you probably know her well She was stoned 15 of her 18 years, and her story was widely told that she could smoke them faster than anyone can roll Well, her legend finally reached New York, that Grove Street walk-up flat where dwelt the Calistoga Kid, a beatnik from the past He's been rolling dope since time began, now he took a cultured toke and said "Jim, I can roll them faster than any CHICK can smoke" So a note gets sent to San Rafael for the championship of the world the Kid demands a smoke-off; "Well bring him on!" says Pearl "I'll grind his fingers off his hands! He'll roll until he drops!" says Calistog, "I'll smoke that chick till she blows up and pops". So they rent out Yankee Stadium, and the word is quickly spread come one, come all, who walk or crawl, tickets just two lids a head and from every town and hamlet, over land and sea they speed the world's greatest dopers, with the world's greatest weed. Hashishins from Morocco, hemp smokers from Peru and the Shashniks from Bagun (who smoke the deadly Pu-ga-ru) and those who call it "light of life" and those that call it "boo". See the dealers and their ladies, wearing turquoise lace and leather See the narcos and the closet smokers, puffing all together from the teenies who smoke legal, to the ones who've done some time to the old man who smoked "reefer", back before it was a crime. And the grand old House That Ruth Built is filled with the smokes and cries of fifty thousand screaming heads, all stoned out of their minds and they play the national anthem, and the crowd lets out a roar as the spotlight hits the Kid and Pearl, ready for their smoking war. At a table piled up high with grass, as high as a mountain peak just tops and buds of the rarest flowers, not one stem branch or seed I mean, Maui Wowie, Panama Red, Acapulco Gold Kif from East Afghanistan, and that rare Alaska Cold and there's sticks from Thailand, ganj from the island, and Bangkok's blooming best (and some of that wet imported s--- that capsized off Key West). There's Oaxacan tops and Kenya bhang, and Riviera fleurs and that rare Manhattan Silver, that grows down in the New York sewers. And there's bubbling ice cold lemonade, and sweet grapes by the bunches and there's Hershey bars and Oreos (in case anybody gets the munches) And the Calistoga Kid he smiles, and Pearly she just grins :-) and the drums roll low, and the crowd yells "GO GO GO!!" and the world's first smoke-off begins. Well, the Kid he flicks his fingers once, and ZAP that first joint's rolled Pearl takes one toke with her famous lungs, and WHOOSH that roach is cold Then the Kid he rolls his super-bomb, that would paralyze a moose and Pearl takes one mighty hit, and ...... that bomb's defused and then he rolls three in just ten seconds, and she smokes them up in nine and everybody sits back and says "Hey.... this just might take some time" See the blur of flying fingers, see the red coal burning bright as the night turns into morning, and the morning fades to night and the autumn turns to summer, and a whole damn YEAR is gone and the two still sit, on that roach-filled stage, smoking, and rolling With trembling hands he rolls his Js, with fingers blue and stiff She coughs and stares with bloodshot gaze, and puffs through blistered lips And as she reaches out her hand for another stick of gold the Kid, he gasps, "Damn it, bitch! There's nothing left to roll!" "NOTHING LEFT TO ROLL!" screams Pearl. "IS THIS SOME TWISTED JOKE?" "I DIDN'T COME HERE TO F--- AROUND, MAN, I COME HERE TO SMOKE!" And she reaches 'cross the table and grabs his bony sleeves and crumbles his body between her hands, like dry and brittle leaves flicking out his teeth and bones like useless stems and seeds Then she rolls him in a Zig-zag, and lights him like a roach and the fastest man, with the fastest hands, goes up in a puff of smoke. In the laid-back California town of sunny San Rafael Lives a girl named Pearly Sweetcake - you probably know her well She been stoned 21 of her 24 years, and her story is still widely told how she still can smoke them faster than any dude can roll While, off in New York City, on a street that has no name there's the hands of the Calistoga Kid, in the Viper Hall of Fame and underneath his fingers, there's a little golden scroll that says "Beware of being the roller When there's nothing left to roll".

Boys Like Girls! Girls like Boys! ITS NATURE's LAW! (No offense intended to non-straight persons^^)

And as the breeze blew ever stronger, my anal flap swayed like a howling pachyderm.

The Philistines.

Only if you press the red button.

42, because ice cream doesn't have bones.

Giggitty giggitty goo!

antidisestablishmentarianism

Yes, but I ate it anyway.

My tummy hurts, I should have stopped after the first piece of barbeque chicken! LOL

Who's the leader of the band whose made for you and me.. M-I-C-K-E-Y...M-O-U-S-E.....

Gee, I have to go pick my other half up from work. Ugh! I want him here at home, but I don't feel like going to get him. Am I being selfish? It's soooo cold and rainy out side. Ugh. I'm dreading it, but really, I do want him home. Why can't I just make him "poof!" appear. I'm warm and cozy. Ugh. Well, here I go.....

Would the following fulfill your needs? EXTINCTIONSPECTROPHOTOPOLERISCOPEOCCULOGRAVOGYROKYNETOMETER from http://www.nssa.com.au/nsfs/Membership/Member_Interests/Luke_Plaizier/spacetrivia.txt

But you can't eat his socks because the key to the cheese has been swallowed

Picking blackberries in a grey sweater was stupid.

how exactly do you decide that one answer is more random than another? is banana more random than street light? a dirty blue sock more random than a corkscrew?

hubcaps!

chocolate goggles

chocolate covered chicken.

lotion

pricing schedule

Your question.

Pudding. That has a stick of Dee-Na-Me-Tay in it. With sprinkles on top. WHAT KIND OF MAN DOESN'T LIKE SPRINKLES?!?!?!

fall of an hill

My sunburn itches

Them bees go ad sting my hand and mama say she need them there honey for din din

You would not want to stuff a cat with caramel.

when the blade of grass asked me to eat his chocolate covered cake on the fourth of july, i wasent sure what he meant....im all like "BITCH GET OFF MY LAWN" and then my pet land-knome (his name is Amsterdam) attackked the crazy leemer. The candy canes that were on sale at the street corner looked stangely like 10-year-old prostitutes to me....but what do i know? im 5

I would throw the pinecones and say Rice o Roni!

This one time at band camp, I stuck a flute in my pussy.

poop is brown and your hair is too did you get pood on?

I hate you too!, no the pants don't make you look fat, the fat makes you look fat, no you can't take my last Ambien, He is shitting on our lawn, don't give me that look, SO WHAT!!, Dad likes me more than you, You suck, Kiss me I am not even a bit Irish, I'm glad your house fell down around your ears, I told you so, It's not my problem, you look kinda high, I swear to God you do that one more time and you'll wish you were never born, I gotta fart, I really do have excellent penmenship, Be careful what you wish for, I'm 5'9' in heels, I don't care WHAT your problem is, Don't chew gum in my car, For chrissakes show 34th st. some love!XOXO

i dont even know how it'd fit up there on its own. anyways, i hear astronauts can choke on their own if there not careful.

Big ones? Little ones? What are they?

a tutor who tooted the toot tried to tutor two tooters to toot said the two to the tutor, "is it harder to toot? or to tutor two tooters to toot?"

Ok, here goes nothing...I heard this today and thought it was absolutely hysterical: "I'll beat my dick like it owns me money!"

No, that is NOT my toe and what were you doing with it anyways? PUT DOWN THOSE PLIERS!

10010100 10100101 00101010 10010100 001001001 00110011

Hmmmm..ChicKon.

Butterflies work better in cookies than frog juice does.

Because the jellyfish will it so. *runs off naked into a forest*

only if you use the purple sprouting broccoli... and don't forget to salt the asparagus!!

cheese and potatoes...

"she thinks her ass is a fruit cake"

Shit happens

Pathetic fallacy is not an insult to one's manhood.

When there's nothing left to burn, you have to set yourself on fire.

If a duck sits still you can catch him by the bill.

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!!

Strap a girdle onto that pot roast and call it a day.

Barnaby Jones

cleavage tattoos...

Its all fun and games till someone loses an eye

Yes, she's moving 5 1/2 hours away so now we have to find another one.

you mean it sticks up in the back like broccoli?

hes a lieing, cheating, rat bastard and you deserve better!

A chicken and a half laying an egg and a half in a day in a half, causing a monkey with a wooden leg to kick all of the seeds out of a dill pickle as he shingles a doghouse with pancakes!

when in delt throw it out.

Sir Henry Berg

Follow the grouper with a pooper scooper.....

Not if you was the LAST immigrant grocer in EARTH, honey. Honestly, the first thing that came to mind...

I said "arc", not "ark"... ...and you call yourself a chef?

Kidnap the Easter Bunny beat him with a stick, lock him up for ninety years see what makes him tick.

maternal love

I had a really random conversation with my friend last night about how men can't type as quick as women because the keyboard keys are too small for their clubfisted fingers! We measured our respective keys - mine 1.4cm and his 1.5cm!! Now that is what I call random!

I have six toes.

More than enough is always too much. (and many people don't realize this)

Sea Horses or Seahorses all one word?

IS cottonheaded ninnymuggin a verb or a noun?

Well, I guess you can argue on that theory, but if we were to imagine this scenario happen to our world... I think we can both agree it's just plain stupid.

You don't think I can take danger eh!? You see this (shows shaved armpits) This makes me arodinamic when I fight! I can take danger! I don't know why, but everytime I have to think of something randome pineapple express scense always pop into my head, lol. :P

ADHD unicorns do my taxes =D

Bull sharks can survive in freshwater and have been 2200 miles up the Amazon River, and have been caught by fishermen in the Mississippi River.

how many people in the world, have 2 different colored eyes?

Fishsticks.

beach

jelly fish

1 > {(1/r) / ΩL) - (1/ΩC)} > 0

speculum

Naval jelly

A fish riding a bicycle.

To do, is not to do, but not to do, is to do.......... Say whaaa? ;)