" i broke up with my first serious boyfriend 3 months ago and i'm still not ready for a relationship.I find something wrong with every guy i meet and just drop him. I just don't want to get hurt again. What should i do? i know you've heard this before."
by 
Anonymous
ANSWERS: 9
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Don't strees. You'll be ready when you're ready. Try to enjoy life now. Hang out with friends, go to the movies, go shopping, start a hobby.
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relax and learn to enjoy being just you again. You wont find the right person if your freaking out. take a deep breath and take time to smell the roses. time will pass and you will meet not only a wonderful man but the right one. cant promise that you wont meeet a lot of wrong ones along the way but at least you will have the clarity to make the better judgements. good luck
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Give yourself plenty of time. Ending a relationship, especially when it is a "first," is very traumatic. Like any other loss, you must give yourself time to go through all the stages of grief before you will be ready to give romance another try. I wish you all the best... :)
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If you dont try to move ahead you may be as stuck as I am in life. I work, I pay bills, I have a wife who hasnt made love to me in 5 months and I want to keep our children with me if we divorce. As soon as I get out of this relation I will search for someone to fall in love with again. There are men out there that will do anything for a woman to love them back. If you dont let them try, you could have a lonely life. No one is perfect but if you just get past the flaws there may be a diamond under all that.I know I have flaws but I still havent met a woman without one either.
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Keep this in mind: there is something wrong with every guy. You are looking for flaws in these new guys when you should be looking for flaws in your ex. Be grateful for the times you had with your ex that were good, but also remind yourself that you are better off not being with someone who cannot fully appreciate you. You need to stop thinking about how you were "hurt" and start focusing on just how much beauty and wonder there is in life. Be grateful. If you are dropping guys left and right then you probably shouldn't be dating at all right now. Don't date someone you can't appreciate just to be in a relationship. That never works out.
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Take some time to be yourself and figure out exactly what you want. If you try to push yourself into a relationship before you are over your ex, you will end up hurting yourself more and hurting any new guy you might get involved with. Trying to jump back into another relationship is tempting, but if you are not over your ex you are naturally going to compare everyone to him and at this point, NONE of them are going compare because you are still focused on the feelings you have for your ex and all of the memories you had together. Take your time and be alone. Be with your girlfriends. Be with your family. Eventually the feelings for your ex will fade if you let them, and you WILL be able to let someone else in and take another chance, but don't do it before you are ready or you'll set yourself up for more hurt. I feel you on this one... I've always been hesitant and I always seem to get hurt, but I wouldn't trade the good times I've had with my exes for anything. They have all taught me something about myself and about what I want in a relationship and what I don't want. One of these times we'll get it right :)
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instead of going for another serious relationship, just try to have fun. try not to think of flaws.
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Its been a whole 3 months.........!!! Why not just wait until you do feel ready?
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I think that you are doing Just Fine !! By being selective; YOu are putting yourself in chare of your life by not just "Settling" for the first guy that comes along .... Good For YOU !! Take your time and WAIT until a guy comes along who meets YOUR "Qualifications" .. it is YOUR life ; so be CHOOSY ... +5
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