There's been some sexual tension between my husband's friend, who is a sex addict, and myself. I've recently developed an urge to be with him. How can I get over this without hurting my husband or my marriage?
by 
goddessmarie
ANSWERS: 21
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Stay away from his friend. Far away. If your husband asks you why, tell him his friend creeps you out. Lie if you have to.
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Make sure that your hubby won't fid out and then go for it. You deserve a fling. It's no biggie...
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I think you know the answer to that if you truly don't want to hurt your marriage and husband, but I will spell it out for you....self control and thinking about all the knock-on consequences should you follow your "urge". YOU would be the black sheep among friends/family since you were the one cheating. You really need to just think what you've got, and what you've got to lose,...another thing is think of how you'd feel if your hubby wanted to get it on with one of your friends. If you honestly wouldn't mind, then go for it. If it would hurt you at all, don't do it!
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Marriage needs to be about honesty. If you aren't honest to your husband about what is going on, you already have something between this guy and you. And if its your husbands "friend", he needs to know that relationship isn't right. The whole thing needs to stop right now, and you and your husband need to be accountable to eachother if you want to be in a committed monogamous relationship. He needs to protect you from situations with this friend and you need to avoid them. Trust me, telling him about your urges now will be alot better than telling him about the affair later.
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I see two options, - You can tell your husband that you want to screw his friend, but consider his response How will he react? divorce, move you out of town, go bananas I'm sure. Weight the consequences to this action (kids, money, assets) no one knows your situation and ultimatly you'll be making the decision here. -Or you can NOT say anything at all with respect to the fact that you know better than to set yourself up for failure by by putting yourself in a situation that will jeprodize your marriage. Everyone's still happy nobody get's hurt. You'll probably have to find other more positive outlets to realease your sexual tension/frustration.
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Dear Urge - Let it go - If he is a sex-addict - Then you've - got to know ,he is PLAYING- YOU ! for real - GET REAL . And your husband - does'nt deserve to be PLAYED - AT ALL-- You know - It's not worth it..!! -- My name is Pattijo
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Whenever you feel that urge, find some time with your husband and get rid of your sexual tension with him. Feeling attracted to someone is one thing. But when you get the urge to act on that attraction then you know you need to take a good hard look at your relationship with your husband and find a way to revamp it. Most men I know wouldn't mind if you introduced something a little kinky into your sex life (like flavored lotion or a new position). Get a book about Komasutra (sp?) and go through it with him. Just do something to spice things up with your hubby and soon your urges will be solely for him.-From Been there.
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You need to cool it and stay away from this guy. The more you think about him or fantasize about him the more tempted you will be. Try to concentrate on what you love about your husband.
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Find a therapist who is qualified in this area. Read books written by Patrick Carnes and Pia Melody. And be accountable to someone else besides your husband (but involve him in your efforts to maintain a healthy relationship). Realize that you can't contain or control this addictive 'sexual tension' on your own. There are a lot of resources out there. Be Willing and Open to finding and accepting these resources.
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get with your hubby's friend quickly. make sure hubby doesn't find out. don;t make any mistakes, neither accidently nor purposely. The sex will be hot and worth it. Getting found i=out will hurt you and hubby and family. Don;t get caught.
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why? my husband cheated on me and it was devastating and it destroy's alot in the relationship. if you want sex, go to your husband. is sex more important to you then a commitment, then someone who loves you! as you said, he is a sex addit, he doesn't want you, he wants the sex. why destroy everthing for him.
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ignore it. Stay away from him.
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There's good reason to be concerned here. The end result it would bring is not of lasting happiness, even if it was consummated in secrecy. Please confess this to your husband and seek God to keep your marital path straight. And ma'am, if possible, have more sex with your husband please!
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wow you have a husband. many ppl dont and cant find love and u have it and ur trying to have ur cake and eat it too? no such luck sweetheart. if u wanna do it do it but at least have the balls to end ur relationship first.
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First, you need to figure out whether there is a problem or something missing within your marriage or within yourself. By figuring that out, you'll be able to heal whatever it is. In the mean time, put your physical, sexual, and emotional energy into your marriage. Try to not be around when this man is around. Also, go to the library and check out books by Shirley Glass. It's great info and great reading. www.marriagebuilders.com is an excellent resource, as well.
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Keep your legs closed first of all. Second look at the problems your husband and you have in your marriage an fix those. Screwing someone other than your spouse is not the answer.
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Lady, don't be a fool...what guy doesn't want to get laid. If your looking to become a bottom feeder by having an affair with your husband's buddy, then you clearly know what you need to do. Its a shame that you give so little consideration to your husband. He should sleep with your sister, and see how well you take it. How many lives does cheating affect? Hmm, I dunno, if you cross that line, guess you'll find out. If you really want to save your marriage avoid the friend. He's an sex addict; in scientific terms, taking the path of least resistance. You offer, he'll take. What's more important to you, a friend or your husband? Thats who you need to take care of.
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DON'T fuck him!! And realize how you would feel if your husband fucked a female sex addict.
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Stay away from the friend and devote as much time on figuring out what is missing in your marrage and try to revert back to when you fell in love with your husband. Remember sex with a sex addict might be great for a little while but it will only last a little while Sex with your husband can be great for the rest of your life if you want it to
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The guy is a player submit to your own fantasies and as soon as he has had you a couple of times he will move on to someone else just enjoy it and make sure that no one will ever find out
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would your husband and you be okay with a 3 some maybe then you can get it out of your system and no one gets hurt.
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