I know plenty of guys that just make eye contact and wait for things to happen too - I think it's just a bit of a showdown when two people fancy each other as to who gets sick of waiting first and decides to move things on. Making eye contact is a good starting point though, for both sexes, it's a good way to suss out whether the guy/girl *might* be interested - if you catch their eye and they look terrified, or go looking for their girlfriend, or pull a disgusted face you can save wasting the bother of going over. If you get a look back, or a smile or a wink - it's a good opening. I think some girls avoid making the first move because they think guys don't like it ( it's unladylike or untraditional or something...). Personally I'm happy to go over and chat to a guy if he's the shy one, but I like to have some kind of signal that he's open to being approached - I'd expect a man to do the same sussing out process as I do.

...Right... so that fact that some women wait for the man to make a move makes them the weaker sex? I don't find that offensive, I just feel annoyed that some men are so ridiculously arrogant and narrow-minded. Perhaps the woman is shy, or doesn't think that approaching a stranger (and they'd have to be to just make eye contact with them) is appropriate. -2 (sorry). (Well no, i'm not really sorry).

FACTS: no matter how loud or how many women say they are equal or how many laws say they are WE will never be equal to man. (Thank God) OPINION: It really has nothing to do with guts. I, being a bold woman have put myself out there on rejections door-step and take it just like a man would (well maybe a few more tears). When you have something the size of a watermelon come out of a whole the size of a pea then we will be equal. Until then...:) P.S. No Offense just answering your question. I gave you points for bravery.

Because we're damned if we do and damned if we don't. If we do say something then we are "slutty" or "being forward" or "pushy". If we don't say something then we are "weaker" or "admitting our inequality" or "gutless", "afraid of rejection" Help!

First of all, not all women "wait for things to happen." You are making a hasty generalization. Second of all, it is traditional all over the world for men to be the pursuers and for women to be the pursued, so you are critisizing and demoting women for following a social norm that it just beginning to change. And finally, if you are so sure that women are weaker because some don't "have the guts to face rejection," why do you put in parenthesis "(no offence)?" If women are weaker, why are you afraid of offending us, when you could just ask us out and face rejection with your alleged superior man power?

You might consider not indicting the entire female gender for your perceptions of inequality....; it doesn't seem like the way to reach out and touch one of them....-:)

When a woman asks a man out, or makes obvious advances to a man, it tells the man that she is "easy" or gives him the impression that she is less than virtuous. A true lady will wait for the man, so as to protect her innocence. A REAL MAN looks for innocence in a woman, and that is why he is turned off when a woman chases him. When I say this, I am talking from YEARS of personal experience. If I chase and man and catch him, I know he's not a real man!

Weaker sex? Maybe their just smart enough not to throw the baby out with the bathwater. That's a pretty sweet deal you know; all of the percieved benefits of being a man without the accompanied, universal fear of rejection by the opposite gender. I'd cling to tradition if I were a woman too, seeing that I'm actually very shy.

Perhaps it is a matter of not caring enough to put themselves out there? I have no issue asking a man out, or starting the conversation, if I feel there is an actual reason, but to be honest, I've rarely met a man worth that effort. If someone is looking at me, I make eye contact whether or not I'm interested. It's the polite thing to do. It doesn't mean I'm interested and waiting for him to make the move. Women have spent centuries being the person who -has- to wait for the man to make the move. Until recently, and even to a certain extent now, if the woman makes the first move she's seen a bold, and easy. Not traits considered attractive in a woman as a general thing. It is hard to break out of that, and take the risk of not only rejection, but gaining the label of hussy.

Oh me Oh my where do I begin to answer this question? Nope I am not going to do it folks will not be baited into telling Masculinist just how power we women are.....nope not gonna do it because it would require me standing on my soap box for about 10 minutes before I slam dunk his male attitude into the ground! ~ponders the thought~ then realizes real men know not to piss off woman!

equal rights!!!! woman don't have to wear shirts in public!!!! though you do have a point, but if they were equal equal then they would like woman too.. that makes lesbians... lesbians don;t like guys... we can never be perfectly equal... face it pal, and deal with it

Actually they are smarter by doing this they do not have to put effort into anything and yet they can get you to come all the way across the room and usually buy them something so who is really the weaker sex our dumb ass buying the stuff and walking across the room to get along with a stranger you have no idea you have a chance with or the one chilling wanting a drink and some dumbass with no chance to buy it I vote for them which is why I never and I mean never buy a women a drink I may walk but I have to be pretty sure before I buy anything

Saying no offense doesn't get you off the hook for being offensive. Women do make the first move. Not traditionally, but it happens.

Equal rights but not the same. As a man, I like to be the aggressor, the "hunter". It is all part of the sex game of courting. I have no problem with that. Besides, we all know that ultimately the women are the ones who control the way a relationship develops more then a man. They are letting us into their bodies. Not the other way around. I have had women approach me. It is not so easy to turn someone down either. Either way, there are pluses and minuses. Women do feel rejection if the man doesn't go after her. Just not as humiliating as when we face it, but rejection none the same. That's what I have been told. +5

no offense, but maybe they just arent talking to YOU!!! I made the first move on my hubby, when I was single, It was almost always me who made the first move. I think YOU look for reasons to justify your masculinist attitude toward women. You view women as inferior and try to find ways to show them that they are. When I was single, i would sometimes LOOK at at a handsome man, but if he had that air of being an asshole, I wouldnt bother talking to him, he was just eye candy, not a prospect. Perhaps thats the way they see you.

OMG you are absolutely hilarious! Maybe it's because those Women know that they hold the power and in the end the man will always come to them! Or maybe, you just think they are making eye contact with you and waiting for you to come over but really they are looking over at your table thinking how pathetic and sad you are!

When I was dating,I didn't have a problem asking a guy out.

i don't know the answer to you question, but i think some of the women (and men) who attempted to answer need to lighten up. some people are always looking for something they deem "offensive" so they can make a big deal out of it and try to make someone feel bad. personally, i found nothing offensive about your question simply for the reason that that's just what it was...a question. you ask a question and you get attacked as being sexist. thats complete BS. instead of being uptight snobs when answering is question, how about actually giving him an answer he can use? you can't blame someone for making a "hasty generalization" (i bet you felt really smart, whoever said that) when probably the majority of girls will wait to be approached. you can't say "oh well not all women are like that" when the guy only comes into contact with the ones that are. i'm sure he's aware of this too, but he's asking why THOSE women wait to be approached. you women who answered sometime ago read into and over analyze things too much. pull ur heads out of ur asses. the poor guy just asked a question, so answer it instead of being a self-righteous, smug protector of equal rights, D-Bag.

I think it depends on the person. Not the sex. Some guys are too afraid of rejection to approach a woman and some women are.

I have known guys that are just as shy about that, and women who will ask out any guy they want. Just easy like that. It depends on the person's personality. But I think, traditionally most girls think the guy should make the first move. Even though that maybe shouldn't be true.

I don't usually behave that way at all. But I find that is a geographic thing. Men in certain places respond differently to agressive women. Here..it's not safe, no one looks at anyone or flirts at all. It's just creepy and odd. Probably why im still single?