by Yari on October 9th, 2007

Yari

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How could men get away without paying child support?

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Answers. 179 helpful answers below.

  • by mysticdeliria on November 24th, 2008

    mysticdeliria

    Simple, don't get anyone pregnant and you're golden!

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  • by ron s is back on October 9th, 2007

    ron s is back

    I don't, and even if I could, I wouldn't. They are my kids also and it's my responsibility to help raise them. Not only financially but emotionally as well.
    Besides, I love the rug rats.

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  • by chuck on December 3rd, 2007

    chuck

    child suport makes me sick i am a single father with three kids 2 girls and one boy my daughters are 10 and 9 and my son is 4 to i have no broblem taking care of them by myself and you dont see me going after their mom for any money I just wish that all the women in this world that cry about childsuport would buck up and take care of their kids no matter what afer all women consider them self as an equal and there not becouse if they were they would quit complaining about what they dont have and take care of their kids considering that any state will give medical cards and welfare to any mother with children under the age of 18 but whats the point for the mother to get ajob and actually take care of her kids when the father is paying $500.00 amonth in child suport or more. even with child suport from the man the women are still going to be on some kind of state assistance no matter what. all the while if men pay child suport the still cant see their child unless its on the mothers terms i belive if a man is paying and wants to see the kids it should be his right to do so with no hassel but it doesnt always work out that way all in all if you have kids and the other parent doesnt want to be a part of his or her life then let them be. stop all of this crying and feeling sorry for your self and do your job

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  • by Goodad on September 2nd, 2010

    Goodad

    Let's go over the whole situation here. This is a great question that I would say crosses the mind of 95% of fathers faced with paying child support.
    If you are in a "normal situation", this is the story:
    Couple decides to divorce. Father moves out and has to find his own place. Mom is awarded custody. Father sees his kids every other weekend. Both parents are faced with increased bills due to having their "own" places. When married, the normal couple made ends meet. Now, both have their new set of bills. Both parents are faced with mortgage (or rent), electric, phone, car, fuel, insurance, food, etc. . Now the courts step in and basically say...."yeah...we don't care about your bills....what is your GROSS monthly income?" They compare that to each other,and say "the calculator says that your 5000 a month compared to her 2000 a month with two kids means you pay 1200 a month". They take GROSS salary, and assess a NET salary deduction. Ridiculous. Well, NET pay for the father is 3600 per month. Take out the 1200, and he has 2400 to live on. Rent is 950, car is 350, car insurance is 100, gas is 200, food is 450, family health insurance is 440. Dad is already sunk. That doesn't include the above and beyond splitting of medical expenses, or anything else. Dad starts to say "why don't you go to work full time?"...."why don't you make your own money?"....all resentment based questions. Mom gets remarried, and moves in with new husband who makes 5000 per month. Her situation has improved tremendously. Dad doesn't get a break. As a matter of fact, the mom may quit her job because of her new husband, and that will make the father pay even more! Does this sound like a good system? Can you now see why the Dad gets filled with resentment. The whole situation becomes depressing. The dad feels like the world is against him. Now he is stressed out over finances....that takes away from the children....no matter what you say....

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  • by closed on October 9th, 2007

    closed

    My ex quit his job and got a really low paying one so the judge would give me hardly next to nothing. I got $62 a month for 2 kids back in the 70's...he was such an a##.

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  • by Stormarm on March 27th, 2012

    Stormarm

    Keep it zipped

    ... or get it snipped.

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  • by Shanel with an S on December 3rd, 2009

    Shanel with an S

    umm wear a damn condom.

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  • by lizvelrene on October 26th, 2009

    lizvelrene

    Keep it in your pants. Christ. WTF is wrong with men today?

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  • by me..... on May 6th, 2008

    me.....

    interesting people but one thing was left out .. what about the little gold diggin sluts that get pregnet for the fun of it becaus there to dumb and cant do any thing better then destroys the guys life??

    any one well??

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  • by Larry_KC on October 9th, 2007

    Larry_KC

    The same way women get away with it. I won custody of my kids from my ex-wife and the court ordered her to pay support. She never paid one red cent and when I went to the county for help in collecting it I was laughed at.

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  • by supriseparent on August 31st, 2010

    supriseparent

    This is to all you women that continue to repeat that men should keep it in their pants: Who the hell are you to place blame solely on a man for both your mistakes. Don't be a slut, don't get too drunk not to insist he wear a condom, stand up for yourselves. OR Just dont spread your legs. Since the beginning of humanity women (except in cases of force) have been in control of when sex occurs, NOT MEN. So stand up and recognize your fault in your problem. You are bitching and wanting someone to take the blame. WAKE UP! Men should take care of their offspring, but it was your choice to have sex with him too. You should not be driving a nice car and working a $10 /hr office secretary job when you have a degree because the man you made an accident with has a good job and has been ordered to pay you mad money. Get off your fat asses and work as hard as he works to support your child. YOU ARE YOUR CHILDS ONE EXAMPLE, DONT LET THEM GROW UP THINKING EXPLOITATION IS ACCEPTABLE. If you dont want a child, insist on a condom no matter if you're a man or woman, or dont spread you legs. SIMPLE AS THAT

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  • by Zack on June 28th, 2011

    Zack

    Keep your dick in your pants to begin with.

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  • by randomness - is now a Maestro on December 2nd, 2009

    randomness - is now a Maestro

    By keeping their penis out of other people's vaginas. It's that simple.

    If you don't want to pay child support, KEEP IT IN YOUR PANTS, or alternatively, USE A DAMN RUBBER.

    If you accidentally create a child, too bad. Once you've created a baby, you are responsible for it's care. If you don't earn enough to pay child support, too bad, get a better job. You really should have thought about this before impregnating a woman.

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  • by GodsDiamond on October 24th, 2008

    GodsDiamond

    They get away because MEN MADE THE RULES for child support. I really commend and applaud those men who
    support their children. You are the best of best and your child should know the difference when they grow up. Let them know you supported them if they don't know already. Let them know (if you know) what happens to families and children especially when child support is not paid.

    It takes a ignorant man not to support his own children just because he can't stand the mother. In fact, this needs to be put into a head check because that woman allowed herself to carry YOUR CHILD in her BODY! You need to HONOR that woman always.! If she is good, bad or what ever....HONOR THE MOTHER OF YOUR CHILDREN AND TAKE CARE OF YOUR KIDS!


    WOMEN....IF YOU DON'T HAVE A LAWYER GET ONE! MAKE HIM PAY!

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  • by Ed the Jetpacking Headbanger on October 9th, 2007

    Ed the Jetpacking Headbanger

    I always paid.
    I think the best thing is to ask the courts to have it
    held from his paycheck.
    I've heard of men moving to states that aren't too strict when it comes to child support laws.
    I also had a co-worker whose wife left him with four children. She was ordered to pay support, but never did. He was too poor to afford a lawyer to sue her.

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  • by GibsonGuy on March 17th, 2011

    GibsonGuy

    Making babies is fun. Paying for them (raising them) is not. Guys get away without paying child support because they are irresponsible, have no money, are too busy making more babies across town, blame the girl, and the courts do not enforce support laws.

    I know 30 year old guys who have eight kids by seven women and they laugh about it. Ya ya, funny. Right?

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  • by fred flintstone on October 26th, 2009

    fred flintstone

    By not having any children

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  • by Anonymous on October 9th, 2007

    Anonymous

    It just happens sometimes. Some men work under the table for years in order to avoid it, and learn how to dodge the law and the system, others just intimidate women into not enforcing it... Lots of ways...

    How can they live with themselves, or sleep at night? That is the thing that I will never understand!

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  • by Starace65 on December 22nd, 2010

    Starace65

    there are men who don't uphold their responsibility, and that is a shame.

    and there are also women who take advantage of men and the child support system. I pay my ex-wife 4200 per month. Yes, you read that right. NY state (Westchester county) doesnt cap the husband income. My ex has a 4 br home, fully paid for, thanks to a gift from her wealthy parents, and works a leisurely 16 hours/week, and goes on vacations, while I am busting my butt to stay afloat.

    It isnt fair. Some women need to realize that men have an obligation to support their children, not them.

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  • by josolo on May 15th, 2008

    josolo

    What about the women who collect excessive child support and have no expenses. I pay my ex over 1400/month and she pays no rent, utilities or food for the children because she still lives with her parents. She has always lived with them and never has had to worry about expenses such as health care because i have always provided it. Now she drives around in a BMW and works a $10/hr job. I pay her more money then she takes makes from her job.

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  • by sanvarg on January 5th, 2011

    sanvarg

    The whole child support system is broke. Custodial Parents ask too much because they have been programmed to ask for more. Judges just want to get people out of their court and the easiest way is to grant the child support that the CP asks. The non custodial parent gets screwed in the process. I am a non custodial parent not by choice but because I am a man. Just as capable and in some cases more so that the mother but I am still a man. I took care of my ex and children for ten years and now that we have separated I must pay child support. I know exactly how much it takes to support children and if I had custody of mine it would cost me an additional 700.00 a month. I making more money than my unemployed ex. Being both equally responsible of them, reasoning would lead us to the conclusion that each parent should be responsible for 350.00. Maybe giving some credit to non custodial parents for time that children spend with them if it is significant. Then why do I have to pay 700.00 a month? That is the entire cost of supporting them at my standard of living. If she doesn't want the responsibility given to me. I would care for them gladly and by myself. But then again she would be 700.00 a month short and she may need to get a job. What a waste of a college degree that I helped to pay for.

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  • by Nats 411 on July 29th, 2011

    Nats 411

    I have read alot of the posts in this question. I hear alot of anger from all sides and most of it is Justified.

    My concern and its my only concern is that the child (ren) MUST be provided for.

    Maybe instead of Money exchanging hands.... Maybe what the child needs can be split among the Parents.

    Here is my story and it seems to work for me...

    You see when he going though a hard time, I said nothing. Once things were better for him, he seemed to forget me. So one year before school began, I told him I did not want one cent from him, but I provided him with a list of all items the kids needed.

    Everything was on this list. School fees, supplies, clothing etc.

    I told him I provided for years without question - Now was his turn. He wanted to give me money, and I kept telling him no. Go out and get what they need.

    Faced with shopping, seeing what things actually cost, struggling to find what they need gave him a new appreciation for me.

    Now, I simply say.... Baby needs this, are you going to get it or am i?

    Between us there are no more money quarrels.

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  • by kassie1990 on February 25th, 2011

    kassie1990

    I am answering this as a daughter of a divorced couple.

    My parents got their divorce finalized when I was 5. I remember when my dad left. He went to FL to live with his mom. He hugged me and my brother and told me that he'd always be "Daddy" and to not let anyone ever replace him. After that, my brother and I saw him once a year. These trips were paid by my mother. He would tell us all that we were going to do on the trips, but then he'd end up taking us to a summer day camp instead. I remember moving in with my grandma. We had lived there before when my mom needed protection against my dad (a violent alcoholic), but this time, it was a little more permanent. She was going to nursing school during the day, and working at night. I didn't learn until later that he wasn't paying child support during this time. In fact, I didn't learn what he owed until I was 16. He came to "visit." The real reason he came was that he needed to show up for court. The state of Texas was threatening to throw him in jail for not paying. He was supposed to pay the MINIMUM for 2 children. My mom never asked him to pay and never complained to anyone. This was the state. They asked my mother if she had been receiving payments, and she was honest. To this day, he still owes. I am 21 and my brother is 19.

    I understand that a lot of men on here are in sticky situations. Each situation is different. I don't blame my dad for not being able to afford child support. I blame him more for his victim attitude. It's not his fault he's in his 40's and still living with his mom. It's someone else's fault he can't keep a job for longer than 6 months. It's my mom's fault that he got a vasectomy and can't have any more kids. It's my fault that we don't talk anymore. Even if he didn't have the money to pay in child support, he still should have made an effort to be a father.

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  • by clarkl63 on January 2nd, 2011

    clarkl63

    I am a full-time student, working full-time, and doing clinical rotations. I provide medical insurance, 200 dollars a week for daycare, provide a vehicle for my son and I, buy my son everything and anything he needs before myself. My son is four years old. His father and I have been divorced for almost three years. He has paid NOTHING.I let my son see his dad, have never threatened taking my son away form him because it is his DAD. I figure one day when he is old enough he will figure it out that he is a total dead beat. My ex goes to court every 30 days to show a "job log" to the judge, while he works for cash money and doesnt give my son a penny.Lives in our home we built in '05' together and has the vehicle. I have made our "OWN" life for us, because I want my son to grow up "healthy" without "issues" and I choose not to stoop to his immature,loser level. I figure it will catch up to him, as will some of you others. For all of you men out there that "dodge" the system for fear that mothers will take the money to "sit on their fat asses" and spend it on themselfs, you need your head examined.. Do I agree with the system making some men give everything they have and be left with nothing? Absolutly not. But, I do agree that men need to pay something. Have you been to the grocery store lately? Brought your son or daughter for a haircut? Paid for clothing (that they grow out of in a month at times)? Ever stop to wonder how many times you are fueling up the gas tank at nearly 3.00 a gallon to get your children to school, sports ect? And another thing you see your children (if and every other weekend agreement) 6-10 days a month. Your childs mother is RAISING your children, taking care of their every need. What the hell is wrong with some of you, like my ex husband that work under the table or "dodge" the law, because you think you are making us suffer? Think again there is a lot that entails raising a child to mold them to be a responsible and respectable human being. That is with you 10 days a month for "play time" and "slumber parties". I love my four year old son to death and give him ALL before I have anything. And the mere fact that some of you men out there have the mentality to not provide for your children make me sick. When your children are old enough I hope they look at you and think you are a joke. You should want the best for your children. Things didnt work out for their mother and you, dont take it out on your children. And for those of you crying about paying more than you can afford, go to your county a appoint a lawyer for little or no cost and get the papers redone. Whether man or women, you made a child together now GROW UP and figure it out like adults. Your children are only children for a blink of an eye and life is too short. I wish some of you selfish weirdos and men like my ex husband could see that. PAY FOR YOUR CHILDREN AND SPEND "REAL" TIME WITH THEM. REMEMBER THEY ARE AFFECTED TRMENDOUSLY BY OUR EVERY ACTION.

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  • by Yari on October 9th, 2007

    Yari

    I actually live in Illinois. Child support tells me that I can put an arrest warrant on him after he's gone over 1k dollars without paying. He is way over 3k. Yet nothing has been done and dont know exactly where he lives. I know the suburb and around where but not exact address. I know his SS though if that helps any. I dont know what to do. I'm a single mother with not the best job. He needs to pay what he deserves.

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  • by Benjamin_P on February 11th, 2012

    Benjamin_P

    It needs to be said that the purpose of paying child support is NOT to help the ex-wife/husband make ends meet. It is to provide for the material needs of the child ONLY. So all those women who complain about the cost of living really need to 'stow it'. It is not about providing for YOU, it is about providing for your CHILDREN.

    That I think means that we can draw two things from this:
    1. payments should be based on the actual costs associated with raising the kids, and not on relative incomes.
    2. There is a reasonable expecation that child support funds be spent on raising the child, and proof of costs should be produced by the custodial parent.

    The current child support systems do not do any of these things: It is not the concept of child support that is wrong. It is the way that it is calculated and implemented that is the problem.

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  • by Texaspete on October 20th, 2011

    Texaspete

    I'll tell you how I did it. I GOT THE KIDS! (2 boys)
    I threw her out of MY house! (I owned the house before we got married) After catching her on MY couch, with on of MY ( so called ) friends, bumping pelvis bones! I saw her twice since then, once at the divorce and once at the custody hearing, I got the boys. She has NEVER tried to see the boys.
    I have gone through a lot of women, trying to find a good woman to be a mother to my 2 boys.
    When the women found out that I had a good job (made good money), owned my own home, a lot of women took me to bed! Then, after they found out that I had had a vasectomy, they dropped me like a hot potato!
    I think they just wanted to get "Knocked up" so they could get their hands on some of my money!
    After a few years of looking for the right woman, I found her!
    After 23 years, we are still together. My boys call her "Mom" And I owned the company I use to work for, till I retired and sold the company. I'm still young enough to enjoy my retirement, with my wife and kids and grand kids!

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  • by glhowe1 on November 18th, 2010

    glhowe1

    It's one thing to take care of your child, it is an entirely different matter when your child support order for one child demands that you pay more than what it costs to support your wife and four other children. I am forced to pay child support for a child in the amount that is over four times what it costs to raise a child. I am also in the Army reserves because I love to serve, yet I am not going to reenlist because of the amount they are taking out of my military pay in addition to my full-time job. Child support laws in Illinois are not based on the actual cost to raise a child. My daughter's mother has been dishonest with the court system with no demand of proof, yet I have been upfront and honest and have to prove everything multiple times. It took me 1-1/2 years to modify child support in the state of IL, yet it took her mom one week and it went through. Many men share the same story; these laws are unfair and nobody cares.

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  • by lafave.dave on July 8th, 2010

    lafave.dave

    LOVE YOUR KIDS MORE THAN YOU HATE YOUR EX !!!! MONEY SHOULD PLAY NO PART!

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  • by Yari on October 9th, 2007

    Yari

    Thats total bullshit! They should really reinforce them to pay. One way or another. My ex is now living with a girl who gets paid very well and he basically went to live with her for convenience. She already had a house, car, and all that he didnt have when we were together. Now he doesnt even bother with his almost 2yr old daughter. What a coward!!

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  • by Unicorn Man on July 29th, 2012

    Unicorn Man

    Every story has two sides. Here is a look at the other side of the coin.

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  • by Zack on May 13th, 2011

    Zack

    When the mom takes the child and runs for parts unknown.

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  • by Lonewolf80 on April 12th, 2011

    Lonewolf80

    The same way my dad did. ran away and said that i wasn't his.

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  • by AG - Definitely Canadian on February 9th, 2011

    AG - Definitely Canadian

    By not doing anything that could result in a baby to begin with.

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  • by Sharon_J9828 on December 28th, 2010

    Sharon_J9828

    Sheesh that's easy, they just do. They lie about what they earn, lie to IRD, hide money in their new wives names, bugger off to another country, have accountants 'cook their books', say they are self employed so the IRD are not able to make an 'attachment' to their wages, and bingo ...no child support paid , and what does the government do ? nothing it seems. So the other parent, the one who cares and DOES take good care of the child(ren) just pays for everything as there is no way to make those loosers pay what they should. YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO HAVE KIDS. Your kids will grow knowing what you are : a selfish looser. Shame on you all.

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  • by MissGarlic_B on November 30th, 2010

    MissGarlic_B

    We really should honour mum and children except WHEN MUM USES CHILDREN AS A TOOL TO MAKE MONEY FROM MAN AND TAX-PAYER! How many lazy mums who don't work and just get child support from their ex and government in this country? It is good in law to protect woman and children, but THIS HAS GONE TOO FAR!! Thousands of men suffer the extremly high child-care in their rest of life, plus the money has not been used on children in most of cases, it has been spent by mums!

    IF A MAN CANNOT HAVE MONEY LEFT AFTER PAYING TAX, CHILDCARE AND ALL OF OHTER BILLS, WHY DO THEY NEED WORK? THEY SHOULD QUIT AND GET MONEY FROM CENTERLINK! IF MUMS BECOME TOO NASTY, MAN HAVE TO DO THE SAME WAY!

    So girls, when you want to make money from childcare, think again!

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  • by Hampton_B on November 28th, 2010

    Hampton_B

    OR close your damn legs its not just our fault if we aren't using a rubber and the women says nothing her fault there should be no child support. unless forced men should not pay child support if they are a good father ie. visits his child. if not and just trys to duck out of it yeah fine get him on child support but my point is its not our fault it all falls on the women it is HER choice if we do or don't use a rubber it is her choice to go around fucking random ppl. it is not our choice to have kids it is yours you give birth to it not us why should we pay for your mistakes.

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  • by Adam_T4506 on September 7th, 2010

    Adam_T4506

    Why can't woman be happy when a real man takes responsibility for his child? I have my daughter as much as possible (close to 50%), Im a student, I was working 2 jobs, now only 1, and I cant even afford to buy her anything new. I dont deny that men who dont take responsibility for there kids are losers and should have to pay, but when a man genuinely cares about his child why should he be penalized and made to pay the woman who knew she could receive a check every month. Woman want NO equality when it comes to child support, they want all the rights of a man, but only to their convienience? I just don't understand why they assume men can give their child all they need and pay for the mother to claim that she does the same

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  • by curlysue on December 2nd, 2009

    curlysue

    Easy they move out of state.its a fact that divorced mothers have a much lower standard of living after the divorce.The woman i babysit for gets $250 a month(for two kids) that is not enough too pay the rent.Her husband left her when her mother was dying of cancer.her child is disabled and she has therapy every week.employers dont want too hire someone that needs this much time off.her husband refuses too take there daughter too therapy even though he only worked part time by choice.he shacked up with his former boss and now hes made another baby.She works full time.she waits in line at the food bank.Her boss told her she just cant do her job anymore because she cant spend the hours.You cant leave this child with a regular sitter as she is unable too feed herself chokes easily mentally ,retarded, autistic etc.She was turned down for SSi for owning a trailer worth$ 2000 which the state says is worth 5000.she doesnt have money too get it reassed.and now they say she cant reapply for two years.

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  • by good squarel on December 2nd, 2009

    good squarel

    move to africa and join a tribe

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  • by Anonymous on October 16th, 2009

    Anonymous

    look am sorry to all you women out there who been hard done by but am here to stick up for my partner.his ex wife refuses to let him have any kind of relationship with his daughter because he brought her back a day late last time he had her 3 years ago all because there was a storm and he had to drive over 100 miles to take hre home. she now constantly emails me and my partner threatning us and even to the point she wished our unborn baby dead!!!!!!!!! he brings home under 100 pound wk home as all he could get after gettin laid off is a p/t job. he payed her 10 wk as thats all we could afford, when he pays it late she txts shouting that she taking action n makes our life hell. she always says go get a better job to support her better yet this woman sits on her fat arse all day on income support, if she so hard done to her children, y dont she go get a bloomin job!!!!!!!!!! tjhis is the kind of women who dont deserve a penny cos it dont go on my step-daughter!!!!!!

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  • by ♡Lady River♡ on January 27th, 2009

    ♡Lady River♡

    Quite easily in Australia. He just submits an incorrect yearly income estimate to the child support agency and claims he will pay any amount owing at the end of the financial year, so no payment is required to be made to the mother throughout the year. When his end of financial year tax is about to be done and his gross annual income appears to be over the estimate he has previously provided to the child support agency, he submits any receipts he can forge or acquire from friends and family for the purpose of reducing his end of year income and therefore brings it back down to a level where any payment required to be made to the mother is so minimal it is of no help at all in supporting his child. If he is unable to do that and his income appears substantial, any refund he is likely to recieve is automatically deducted for the tax he has usually not paid throughout the year, leaving no amount available to forward to the mother of his child. Meanwhile the mothers government support payment has the amount he is supposed to be paying her deducted from it and she barely has enough to live on, let alone support their child. The government will then pay a child care centre to care for her child in order for her to return to the workforce. Crazy stupid system to pay strangers to care for someone's child when they could simply pay the mother to do so herself, or at least incorporate a system where parents are forced to pay child support first and foremost regardless of their income and other debts.

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  • by littlerook on November 24th, 2008

    littlerook

    Quite simple. move out of state, and hope the woman does not track you down. That's what my grandpa did, and apparently as long as he never came back into the state of missouri, he never had to pay child support on my mother, not a dime. Granted he lost precious time with his daughter and grandchildren, but whats time when you got money?

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  • by Little big mouth on October 9th, 2007

    Little big mouth

    VERY EASILY. Depending on your state it takes up to 90 days for an income execution to go through, which is plenty of time for them to quit several jobs before it starts. If you live in NY state, e mail me, I know all the phone #'s by heart

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  • by BadManners24 on March 23rd, 2014

    BadManners24

    They could either wear a rubber or keep their dicks in their pants

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  • by Swoop62 on February 12th, 2014

    Swoop62

    Had a neighbor who gave up all rights to his son, moved out of State and is not allowed to spend a night in this State again and paid no more support.

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  • by BigDre on February 12th, 2014

    BigDre

    Never get a job, be a bum or subject yourself to prison by doing illegal things to survive instead of getting a job.

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  • by Dstratton85 on August 17th, 2013

    Dstratton85

    This is all so frustrating. I literally paid everything I had to the point I lost my home, my ca, and yes MY JOB. All because she insisted on making my life as miserable as humanly possible. SHE DIVORCED ME because I wouldn't quit my job and move from dallas to central Pennsylvania and take a job with her father?! Once she divorced me, she claimed she didn't want my money and that she would never take my kids away from me! Guess what, she wanted all of my money, and decided to take my kids from their loving father without any plan other me buying a plane ticket from Dallas to Harrisburg, on Saturday morning because after work at six on Friday there are NO flogs to Harrisburg. Then on Saturday I have to get the rental car, buy car seats, then get the children who reside an hour and a half from the airport. Assuming their mother allows me, she's been known to change her mind on a whm. At this point it is about 8 pm on sat. We go to Chuck-e-cheese, another hour and a half away and then go back to the hotel where I needed cribs for them to sleep. The next morning we get up at 330 am and begin driving the hour and a half to drop them off, then another hour and a half to get back to the airport. Catch my flight all so I can get back In time to be at work at 7 am on Monday so I can ensure I stay out of jail by paying the $1400 per month in child support, not to mention the $1500 minimum I paid to see them for a couple of hours. She wanted a baby, we had twins, I had a great job to support them, so I was ok with it. Guess what when she's not happy you lose everything you've ever worked for your entire life. I am in tears writing this and seeing the ignorant comments posted by women on here. It makes me sick. Not only do you lose all financial security bc she wasn't happy you lose all dignity and self respect because now no matter what you are branded as a dead beat dad, bc there is no way a man can go from getting by on his paycheck to giving 75% to his ex wife for her support and the child support and forget about seeing your kids, no ones for that even, so your ex wife uses that in court to claim you don't care about your kids and she should be free to take them wherever she wants. You have to beg you sister in law for some of the hazard pay your brother is getting from the Army because he is in Afghanistan fighting for my "freedom" which is non-existent as I will be an indentured servant for the next 23 years. All because she wasnt happy I will never again enjoy freedom as a free man. Your sister in law wires you the money as quickly as she can so it will get there in time for you to write a check in court to the lawyer you are paying to sue you and take everything you have. Plus you have to pay the lawyers bill directly this time because your exwife would not give you a few days to try and come up with the money. All bc she needs as many problems as she can get out of you in contempt so she can take your kids never for you to see them again, and then claim I am the one who doesn't want to take responsibility to be a part of my children's lives. And so on, and on, and on, and on, and on... It gets more ugly in the court room where the disgusting judge acts like a mix between judge Judy and a Nazi Gestapo Police Officer. Threatening to put my mother in jail for shaking her head silently as he read his decision to take even more of what I had and force the complete loss of my babies to the pathological liar that will raise them. And all because she wasnt happy, NOT BECAUSE I HAD SEX. I love my babies, and though I regret having sex with that devil of a person, I wouldn't take them away any day. I just want my freedom back.!

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  • by watupg on May 13th, 2012

    watupg

    Commit suicide.

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  • by Nobodyy on February 23rd, 2012

    Nobodyy

    Neither Men Nor Women should get away from child support.

    This legal system is sleeping on status quo and filled by capital interest to rob the hard working ones, to subsidies hooligans in the hope to exchange for social stability. It is in desperate need of a revolution to implement a more surgical, targeted, cost effective working system.

    I am a single mother of a 7 year old, divorced for 5 years. I would have to say that it IS true that a woman takes on more in child birth - pregnancy hurts career competition and child birth is at the risk of life.

    For the first three years that my daughter's father paid child support, he had been on schedule, he had always been late by minimally a month. What hurts me the most was that he had never paid a single visit to the child, had never remembered any holidays or the girl's birthday. He simply says it's better my daughter and me if he is out of the child's life and he wants his life, too! My 7 year old daughter has been wondering who her dad is and have been crying at every father's day until age 6. I had to email him photos and the girls growing up to keep some kind of bonding and humanity going.

    He has stopped paying child support since June 2011 since he lost his job.

    I did not proceed to court because I am still giving it a best hope, and what's so good for putting my daughter's biological father in jail anyways? I do not want my daughter to grow up and see this type of inhumane behavior from her father. I had to call him to encourage him, despite him putting his frustration on me.

    It's somehow a normal reaction that when a man fail due to incapability, laziness, selfishness, or greediness, they blame the environment.

    I'm a full time working mom - 10 hours work schedule, supporting my daughter, and sponsoring my parents who come from overseas to take care of my daughter and their daughter. I do decently well at career, yet as my tax bracket went up, I receive less for monthly income and tax rebates.

    Meantime, my boyfriend was married for 6 months only. His ex wife abandoned him after 6 months of marriage, took the baby away, and filed a case to get half of his savings. She has three medical degrees yet refuses to take a full time job but to live on child support. In the past four years of separation, she took the baby girl to doctors 20 times in a season, trying to find medical evidence of abuse (e.g. asking for neck pressure on the toddler). She had been able to claim a domestic violence on him as well so that he did go see the criminal judge. I see him being heart broken at night for not being able to see his daughter, and I see how that criminal court experience hurt his positive personality.

    Someone used to say that it is a blessing that there are people who want to take advantage of you. Once nobody wants to take advantage of you, then you are forgotten and in real trouble.

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