Men understand on an intellectual level, but that cannot override the hardwired impulse to look at females that are attractive to them. A look is OK. A long look is pushing it. A loooong look with drool coming out of the corners of his mouth is a sign you need to find a new BF.

the ladies need to get over it ...don't blame us men for your short commings .... you and you alone put these thought in your heads not us men ...enough!because I for one have had a gut full of being blamed for every female short commings ...and if we sometimes don't get hard (as you put it) it could just mean we are tired and nothing more ... but that never seems good enough it always has to be some other reason ... well its not so the sooner you's stop reading things into this that have nothing at all to do with this and many other things the better

Really now, I see nothing wrong with looking at a women. As long as I don't "check out" or stare, is there anything wrong with a glance? As for not getting hard... Well I've only had it happen once (with a guy in a 40 degree room) and it never happened again. He didn't start crying about me not being attracted to him. Maybe it's just a difference in people. As to finish, Men will never stop "looking" just like women will never stop "looking". It's just natural, I've "caught" a few of the girls I dated looking at other guys, it was no big deal, same as they caught me looking at other girls.

it's like if you look at other's car and compare it with yours, things will be fine if you always win in the comparison

I don't believe that my boyfriend should be punished for my imagination. ;) What can you do? Well, you can get yourself to stop inventing problems that don't even exist in the first place.

My wife just laughs at me when I look. She knows I wouldn't want to be anywhere else then right by her side.

This sounds like a matter of confidence and security than anything else. Men look at other women all the time, as do women at men (but less obviously) - its a natural reaction to beauty. His RESPONSE to what he sees depends on how strong your relationship is and if you both feel calm, secure, and most importantly, loved. It also matters what kind of man you have. If you don't have the above feelings and senses, the problem is with your relationship, not with other women. If you are secure with him and him with you and trust is strong, then it wouldn't matter if 100 women fell to the ground with their legs open in front of him - he would probably shrug his shoulders and say "naa" and just walk off. It doesn't matter what the temptations are - it matters what his response is and this is governed by his state of mind, his feelings for you and if he is genuinely happy, satisfied and loved in his relationship with you. Worrying about any bedroom issues is the last of your concerns and unless there are any medical concerns or issues (in which case these need addressing too) such concerns are very likely to go away on their own (or be non-existent) if you and your man feel right about each other and the above feelings are present.

Develop your own self-esteem, without needing it from others and remember, men suffer from self-esteem issues also, but are not inclined to speak on them.

Not all women feel that way. You have to remember that sex to men is usually just that: sex. Women more often tend to combine so many other things with sex. Just because he looks at/gets aroused by other women doesn't mean he's not aroused by you. There's tons of hot women in the world. I join in with him, looking at other hot girls. We've been with other women together as well. He's also been with other women without me. Now I totally understand a lot of women aren't as open like I am with this. But in regards to looks, don't worry about it; it's totally natural and only physical. And a few last things as well; there are women out there in relationships who complain about this stuff (my guy is always staring at hot women) when they don't put any effort into their own looks. For women who never dress up/dress sexy for their man, what do you expect? I'm sure if you dressed sexy for him, he'd stare and compliment you as well.

A man feels alot of pleasure when a woman is in to herself no matter what she looks like. You have to feel good about yourself. A woman was made for a man and you let chemistry take over from there.

The problem is that women assume they know what's going through a man's head even if he glances at a woman. . If a man happens to glances at another man, they don't assume that it means anything but if he glances at a woman, they make assumptions - which may not be accurate. A person's self esteem shouldn't be that fragile.

Not all men are like this. Some men have manners. Some men are actually evolved enough to consider the feelings of others. Looking at other people and admiring their looks is not the irritant here. It's how they do it. If they are caught up in more than a look and making an obvious deal over it, I would walk. It's only going to get worse. As far as the not hard thing, leave him alone until he wants to make love.

Have you ever thought for a minute how the guy feels about not being able to get an erection? Its embarrasing to him and kills his self-esteem. Stop making this about you. Its natural for men and women to look at one another. Loosen the reins a little there soul sister.

When a man cant get hard in bed, Trust me His self esteem is suffering much more than yours is.

If a man cant get hard in bed it doesnt always mean he doesnt like you! He will feel much worse than you about it. just because a man looks a a woman doesnt mean much as long as its just looking. Seems if thats how you feel your confidence is shot to start with!

Men and women often look at nice flowers, but it doesn't mean they want to pick them, and don't beat yourself up about his arousel/or non arousel with you, it probably bothers him more.