by Anonymous on December 21st, 2005

Anonymous

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Is it okay to casually flirt with someone else's boyfriend?

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Answers. 68 helpful answers below.

  • by Xclamation on December 21st, 2005

    Xclamation

    I find it hard to think of a situation where casual flirting isn't okay. Flirting is a fun, relaxing exchange between two (or more) people that does nothing but promote positive feelings.
    Don't worry about whether the fact that this guy is dating someone else. Whether or not it's okay for him to flirt is completely between him and his girlfriend. If the borders of their relationship are so rigid that it's not okay for him to flirt, well, it's up to him to enfore the no flirting restrictions, not you.
    On the other hand, don't become overbearing about it. If he makes it clear that he doesn't appreciate casual flirting be respectful.

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  • by Alatea on December 21st, 2005

    Alatea

    In my opinion, if you already know he is someone else's boyfriend then it's not okay to casually flirt. Casual flirting causes wrong signals and confusion. As well if the intent behind the flirting is to cause disruption in his relationship with someone else then I believe it’s very wrong. Casual flirting brings a romantic/sexual expression with hints of intimacy. It’s wrong to play games with someone already involved in a relationship.

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  • by buster on February 20th, 2009

    buster

    All men are game. If I like a guy I'm going after him. Life is better that way for each of us. Live true to yourself and you'll have a happier life.

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  • by mabel44 on December 22nd, 2005

    mabel44

    Live by the moto---
    do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
    then you can't go wrong.

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  • by Anonymous on December 2nd, 2006

    Anonymous

    Would u want some girl to casually flirt with YOUR boyfriend?

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  • by Answers101 on February 27th, 2006

    Answers101

    No, it's not because you should respect other people's relationships.

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  • by Persky Bunkermeister on December 21st, 2005

    Persky Bunkermeister

    It depends. If all involved parties are okay with the flirting, then it's okay -- honesty is more important than fun in this case... what does your partner think of you flirting with somebody else? How would you feel about somebody "casually flirting" with your boyfriend? If you don't have a partner, it probably would be best to pick someone a little more available to flirt with. When you are single and flirting with an attached man, your intentions could easily be misinterpreted.

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  • by Anonymous on December 28th, 2005

    Anonymous

    As a self-confessed flirt and firmly attached woman, I'm suprised by how many people gave such a strong "no" to this that I sat down and thought it over for a bit, in light of my own experiences on both sides of the situation. My boyfriend works in a bar, and I'm aware that a lot of banter and flirting goes to and fro between customers and staff, and staff and other staff. I know because I did the job myself for some time. I'm actually sort of fine with this. If girls flirt with him, if he flirts back- as long as its all strictly non-contact I don't mind. And as long as its just flirting (Try nick my man I'll be after you with a knife!) So to the person who said "Would it be ok for me to casually flirt with YOUR boyfriend"- yes, absolutely. I've spoken to a couple of friends about this and they all seem to be toeing pretty much the same line. You have to consider that plenty of married or attached women really enjoy flirting with gay guys (and vice versa) they KNOW there's nothing in it, its just fun, a laugh, a hobby even. Flirting is about fun and friendliness, not about sex. It looks like some people have got a little confused about what the question was actually asking (it wasn't "Is it ok to try and pick up someone elses boyfriend" after all)
    I think there is a line that sometimes gets crossed which is why so many people are uptight about it. Remember that flirting is above all a friendly activity, rather than a sexual one.The idea of flirting is essentially to make someone feel good about themselves- make them feel attractive, and make yourself feel attractive. Its not about trying to achieve sexual goals. After some deliberation I came up with these guidelines:
    1. Don't touch. No knee rubs, no furtive brushing against each other, no hair stroking, no nothing. A hug, or brief peck on the cheek to say hello or goodbye is permissable, but only if you're in the habit of such displays with everyone- don't single out one person for this. And don't let it linger.
    2. Don't be over-sexual. Flirt by flattering (eg. "you look nice, that shirt really suits you." or even a cheeky wolf-whistle when he takes his top off) but don't make outrageously sexual comments or suggestions about what you might like to do to him, or talk too much about sex in general.
    3. Don't ever insult his partner, your partner or suggest, even jokingly, that you'd rather be with him than whoever you're with. In fact, try to ask how his partner is at some point, and if appropriate, refer to your own, to make it perfectly clear that everyone knows where they stand.
    4. Don't do it in front of his partner. Its unfair and horribly uncomfortable for her (or him), and if she misreads the situation, you may well get a hefty slap.
    5. If he breaks any of the above rules, or makes you otherwise uncomfortable, BACK OFF, and immediately mention his girlfriend's name as much as possible, or you'll bite off more than you can chew.

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  • by newyorkny on December 2nd, 2006

    newyorkny

    My first instinct was to comment NO, it is not OK. But after reading Fuscia's answer I realized that although we don't like to think of our partner flirting or being the recipient, it is a natural, mostly innocent and sometimes necessary part of human interaction that occurs every day. Most people probably to it without even realizing. Flirting can be a brief bolster to the ego and can actually benefit your relationship by making you a happier, more self confident partner because you feel you are still desirable. So my answer is, it's OK as long as you don't take it to the next level and out of respect, never do it in front of your partner.

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  • by christine barney on December 29th, 2005

    christine barney

    Sure it's okay if you casually want to be disliked.

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  • by .Pretty . Zombie. on February 20th, 2009

    .Pretty . Zombie.

    If you're okay with potentially getting punched in the neck, it's perfectly fine. =D

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  • by aydeology on December 15th, 2008

    aydeology

    Only if you're looking for trouble.

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  • by Tina Anderson on December 27th, 2005

    Tina Anderson

    I would say "NO!" Why would you do that in the first place if you know the person is attached? It may be fun, but it is always wrong to flirt with someone elses mate.

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  • by manoftheforrest on December 23rd, 2005

    manoftheforrest

    I have a philosophy in life I have always believed in living by.
    You can do whatever you want in life, as long as its between two consenting adults and is not hurting anyone else.
    Just ask yourself that question, is it hurting anyone else?

    Come'on you know you would be, and are just hoping to find someone that will say, "yeah go for it" to make you feel less guilty.
    But sorry, were not your concience. Those of us with enough life experiance, already know its not worth it.
    Things can get messy. Virtually every incident lately in my country, New Zealand involving three people where one or two get murdered with unusual objects such as machetes etc tend to be lovers spats ask yourself do you want to end up in that situation?
    do you want to be all over the newspapers when it does happen? do you want to loose your friend? you know I'm right cos I always am :-)
    Just call me Dr Phil lol But seriously it may not come to that but if you have something wonderful why risk loosing it? unless of course your'e not really interesting in being with the person you are already with?
    So my answer to that in one word is UMM NO!

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  • by mabel44 on December 23rd, 2005

    mabel44

    Your question was is it alright to flirt with someone elses boyfriend?

    Ask yourself, is it alright for someone else to flirt with your boyfriend,

    I would think NOT.

    But then again if the boy responds to the flirting who would want him anyway.

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  • by Kimmy on December 15th, 2008

    Kimmy

    If you want to get punched in the head.

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  • by Happy to be me on December 14th, 2008

    Happy to be me

    WTH? Of course not.

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  • by roserose100 on December 14th, 2008

    roserose100

    Don't play with fire or you could get burned. So, no!

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  • by blackbeltbody on December 2nd, 2006

    blackbeltbody

    You mentioned doing it behind your "other's" back. thats wrong. no secrets.

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  • by Anonymous on September 4th, 2006

    Anonymous

    No!! if you plan on doing nothing with this flirting of urs then why are you even bothering.

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  • by Anonymous on December 24th, 2005

    Anonymous

    Would it be ok for me to casually flirt with YOUR boyfriend? It's such poor taste, and reflects a lack of respect for yourself, the guy your flirting with, and especially HIS girlfriend.

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  • by Answerersapprentice on April 7th, 2011

    Answerersapprentice

    Wow, you are obsessed with this guy. Lots and lots of the same questions...

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  • by Anonymous on February 20th, 2009

    Anonymous

    No, what might seem like harmless could end up really hurting someone.

    Imagine, if your friend flirted withn your boyfriend how would you feel?

    Flirting with an attached person can be very dangerous and end up causing so much pain and grief that you couldn't even begin to imagine.

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  • by Jimmy on February 20th, 2009

    Jimmy

    it depends on the setting, if you are at a party and your a naturally flirty person, then i don't see tha harm as long as it's just flirtting

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  • by Alte Rego on February 20th, 2009

    Alte Rego

    That depends on what you mean by 'flirting'. Sexual flirting, come-ons, teasing: no. Subtle playful stuff like laughing at a guy's jokes (whether funny or not), longer eye contact, smirking, etc: Perfectly okay.

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  • by Daze on February 20th, 2009

    Daze

    as long as its not sexual of course its okay,,, flirting isnt a bad thing and if they have a boyfriend or girlfriend they should be aware already

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  • by Countess Crapula on February 20th, 2009

    Countess Crapula

    If you look at it this way, everyone is someone else's boyfriend, and whether we do it intentionally, we are always flirting with each other. Now, if you are thinking of testing him just for your own ego boost, well, that's not very ool-kay, so be cool

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  • by krsnaknows on December 15th, 2008

    krsnaknows

    No, please stay away from trouble.

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  • by Julian on December 26th, 2005

    Julian

    I guess we all flirt occasionally especially if we find the person attractive no matter if they have a significant other-It’s human nature, and any one that says different is lying to themselves especially if you find that other person super attractive- It really all depends on the chemistry you feel with that person, if they make you laugh, smile or just their presence just makes you feel good- It’s crazy taboo but it makes life fun, just don’t ever cross the line, what’s meant to happen will, Don’t force it because chances are you will end up regretting it, as I did.

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  • by labeeb xaman on December 25th, 2005

    labeeb xaman

    I think it depends on his and your partner. If it's ok with his GF that others flirt with her boyf and it's ok for your boyf that you flirt with him then there's no harm. Some people don't care much about that while others want their partner to be only theirs.

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  • by Jane on February 20th, 2009

    Jane

    no it is not okay. It is very disrespectful.

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  • by dimaka on February 20th, 2009

    dimaka

    I will say no its not ok but if u look it from different point of view what are the possibilities that can happen? First the girl will see u show interest in him and may start to think higher of him as someone wanted by others as well, that way she will feel better since she's his gf and in a way it can make their relationship stronger.She will probably never speak to u again or start avoiding u but thats normal since u are going after her bf, on the other side they both may be unhappy with eachother after too much time together and u can be doing them a favour, change is always a good thing. But know that whatever u do u will risk your friendship with the girl, if she isnt your friend better stay away because u dont know what kind of person she is and there are more than enough crazy people in this world already so be careful.

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  • by Over and Out on February 20th, 2009

    Over and Out

    It's just not very respectful to the girlfriend. It also makes the flirter look kind of trashy I think. Just my opinion.

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  • by Mountain Momma on February 20th, 2009

    Mountain Momma

    No, its very disrespectful.

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  • by Bridget on February 20th, 2009

    Bridget

    I suppose. But be prepared that some one might do it to yours

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  • by Aimee on January 27th, 2007

    Aimee

    id say most likely no

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  • by Aimee on January 27th, 2007

    Aimee

    id say mostl likely no.....

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  • by Miss. Tandra on December 7th, 2006

    Miss. Tandra

    uhh i dont think so! would u want another chick flirtin with your man??

  • by Spunts.answered 67 questions in 1 hour. on January 27th, 2007

    Spunts.answered 67 questions in 1 hour.

    play with the pups and get bitten by the fleas.
    question is,do you want to be bitten?

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  • by Big on December 14th, 2008

    Big

    NO NO NO NO NO....Noone better do it to me and I won't do it to them. Agreed?

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  • by youngster on December 15th, 2008

    youngster

    Yes as long as their girlfriend is not around...

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  • by lovemenotloveme on December 14th, 2008

    lovemenotloveme

    Is it okay for someone casually flirt with your love one?

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  • by ukigrl92 on December 3rd, 2006

    ukigrl92

    i think that it isnt because i mean flirting is done to get TOGETHER with someone meaning just starting a relationship wen both of u r single...but this is wrong becase the guy is going to be confused and his girlfriend wont be happy and everything....plus hes together with someone else already...those r liek the first steps to cheating i think

  • by PinkCantaloupe on December 28th, 2005

    PinkCantaloupe

    It matters less what you do, and more how you do it. Because you've posted this question on Answerbag it indicates that what you're doing is probably wrong. This dosen't mean you should stop flirting with this person, but try flirting in a different way. It's usually better to express your interest in someone than to repress it.

  • by A on April 7th, 2011

    A

    Well, would you want an overly eager girl flirting with your boyfriend? If your answer is "No", I think you know the answer.

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  • by CoolChange on April 7th, 2011

    CoolChange

    No, mmf's can be fun

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  • by The Doctor of Computer Forumz on April 7th, 2011

    The Doctor of Computer Forumz

    Husband, yes. Boyfriend, no.

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  • by knowitall22 on May 20th, 2012

    knowitall22

    Only AFTER he breaks up with her. That is key. However....if she got in there and interferred with you and his potential relationship earliler, and came on strong to him, then all bets are off.
    Rest assured she will come back after him. If he falls for it, to make you jealous, or for any other reason, let him go, yesterday. He's a player.

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  • by pixie flirt on December 23rd, 2005

    pixie flirt

    You're all right. But I think how well you know the person who's boyfriend you are casually flirting with should also be a factor. Not to mention...he he he....if the dirty slut wronged u in any way and you seriously do like the guy....well...i'm just saying....revenge is always an option. But if your close to the person and u know that the girl is indeed a GOOD person then it's not okay. It's never okay to hurt anyone on purpose...unless of course it's the reason above...the one involving revenge? lol! : )

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  • by Bob Ed on December 22nd, 2005

    Bob Ed

    Only if your a husband.

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