You befriened a member of the opposite sex. You start to develop a strong, mutual interest in each other and you come to find out that they are married. You don't know if their intentions are real/honest or if they just want an affair. What would you do?
by 
Sheepingly needs no handy men only hugs
ANSWERS: 17
-
Since I have been in this situation before, I can tell you that married men NEVER leave their wives, no matter how bad they claim their marriage is. I would tell this gentleman that I only want to be friends with him as long as he were married. If he truly loves you he would leave the wife before he started anything up with you. Be careful- sometimes they will tell you anything including that you'd make a great mom and that they hope you don't marry anyone else to get into your pants. And remember the old saying, "if he'll cheat with you, he'll cheat on you".
-
I wouldn't get involved with a married man, period. It wouldn't matter what his intentions were, I'd be out of there the moment I learned he was married.
-
Give them an ulitmatum, either you or the wife! Otherwise you will waste YEARS of your life waiting for a man who has no intention of leaving his wife. He won't leave the wife and I'll tell you why, because he has the security of a home, and if he leaves the wife he'd have to pay alimony or some sort of support which is something he's probably not wanting to do.
-
Don't pursue it, its not right to ruin their marriage or to hurt their spouse like that for a love affair that will probably never work out.
-
I do not put myself in positions to form new and lasting friendships with men. Casual work relationships.. sure but to the point of phone calls etc? No. I have 10+ years of friendship with a couple of guy friends but making new ones? No. I only have room for the one man in my life and making room for another one would shortchange the one I have now. Because men and women are naturally attracted to one another.. add chemistry and if one or both of the people are involved with others.. it will equal pain and misery ... especially to the innocent ones in the situation. How honest can his intentions be if he is allowing himself the opportunity to spend time with a woman who is not his wife in what may lead to something intimate either emotionally or physically? Men and women can be friends.. sure but to form new ones with some type of attraction while involved with someone else? I cannot see any good coming of it but heartache... for someone.
-
I would back away and keep your friendship completely platonic and if I found that hard to do then I'd sever the ties completely + up
-
If he is married then his intentions are not honest or honourable to either you or his wife/family. Drop him and back off fast , you will either be very hurt yourself and end up feeling used. Or you will cause another person and maybe children a lot of hurt.
-
I would not cheat. That is just wrong.
-
I would end the relationship right away. That other person needs to focus on their family and you owe it to yourself to find someone who can focus on you.
-
back away NOW. they are married and you need to respect that even if they don't.
-
Dont assume anything his feelings may or may not be platonic only he knows how he feels if he hasnt expressed them to you, you can not jump to conclusions or put motives in his head. Maybe he has no idea how he feels so his intentions are not to hurt you or his wife.You can mantain a platonic friendship with a man if you both know your limitations and the lines you can and can't cross.I would continue the friendship until I felt uncomfortable or until he would say point blank, hey I want to sever this relationship.
-
There is only one thing to do, nothing he's already married. That should tell you something right there. He/she didn't even mention this in any of your conversations? How would you like to be the next unspoken spouse? There are to many other people in the world, don't get mixed up with a jerk.
-
If they were a really upfront kind of person, you would have learned about their spouse a long time ago. Do yourself a favor and don't just walk away from this person, RUN!
-
I'd say it would be wise to just back away. For if I was married I sure would not want anyone else to come between us, other than the LORD that is......M.C.S.
-
100% agree with Firebrand's comment (slight adjustments)'If s/he is married then their intentions are not honest or honorable to either you or their family'. The married person should never have put him/herself or you in the position to be confused. Obviously their spouse was not on their mind for you to become that close and to have never mentioned being married. SO how real/honest is that person if they have made a lifelong commitment and never had a thing to say about their partner? Back off, quickly. There are too many lovable *single* people out there to think about getting involved with a married one with all the pain, heartache, confusion and loss of self respect that type of relationship entails. In the end you would either end up alone or with a cheater, at least in heart if not physically.
-
RUN AWAY, RUN AWAY...FLEE FLEE!!! Honest people do not give into or create, or support having an affair. If one is unhappy in one's relationship...married or not....one GETS OUT of the relationship before one begins ANOTHER...
-
Sorry wrong Question
- M.C.S. - Dave RELATED QUESTIONS
Copyright 2023, Wired Ivy, LLC