Coming from a background that ingrained the fact of sex=sin, I've heard every explanation there is. That doesn't mean that I agree, believe, or follow it though. Waiting for marriage is about respect and purity. Anything that causes you to degrade the holy nature of sexual acts is a sin. Therefore everything from cyber sex, grinding while dancing, oral sex, and some even go as far to say that kissing is wrong. Now the act itself might not necessarily be wrong, but the fact that it is taking away from the purity and wholeness of the gift given through marriage is what is wrong. Sure you might still be a virgin, but your view on sexual activity is now changed and your respect for it has as well. Personally speaking however: I think that it is an outlet of experimentation that should be acceptable. Going into marriage completely blind to what sex and sexual activities are like is stupid. It makes up a big part of marriage and you should know what you're getting into when you say vows and make things legal. Therefore you should really be able to explore what is out there and explore what you like as an individual before giving everything up for marriage. That doesn't mean I'm saying that everyone should go out and sleep around, but you should be knowledgeable before going into a marriage commitment. AND humans are sexual beings. Asking someone to completely contain themselves sexually until they finally reach marriage in a society that is ever-pushing the marriage ages back is practically impossible.

1) I newly heard the view that sex should only be started after the first child was born... 2) I am afraid I do not qualify to answer the question And for these people who are qualified, the answer would also depend of it is made before or after marriage. 3) I think that phone /cyber sex is more to be compared to masturbation, although it could sometimes imply sexual exploitation. It has the advantage that STD cannot be transmitted that way and that contraception is not necessary.

I don't think about it. Phone is phone, and sex is sex.