apathy, and not having to actively try to attract a mate as you do when you are dating - once you have one, and you're married, your self-standards relax, if not disappear altogether. i'm not saying this is how it should be, but often this is how it is.

Sometimes it can be, as cusomGlock9mm has said, because self-standards relax, and the relief at no longer having to preen to attract a mate. But, I can say from experience, that my weight gain started after marriage, because I was used to cooking large meals for 4-6 people at home, and cooking for two was a shock. I made far too much, and (no excuse I know but true) I was taught not to waste food...so I ate more....;-(

They're not "on the market" anymore. They get TOO comfortable with each other. Not good.

Complacency.

when the merchandise is sold its not so important to maintain it as much

1) Men (just joking) "Why do married men gain weight and bachelors don’t? Bachelors go to the refrigerator, see nothing they want, then go to bed. Married guys go to the bed, see nothing they want, then go to the refrigerator." Source: http://www.joe-ks.com/archives_jun2004/Married_Men_Weight.htm 2) Women (but a lot of it applies to men too): "• You think you have found a partner for life, no need to attract him anymore. • You need to let your hubby know that you are a good cook. • You cook for the family, giving preference to their choice. • You eat as much as your partner, talking and munching! • You eat the left-over, trying not to waste food. • Your partner encourages you to eat more showing that your extra fat is not going to turn him off. • You want to be loved unconditionally, not happy with the marriage, feeling disrespected, rejected and unloved. • Pregnancy occurs" This quote and more information here: http://ezinearticles.com/?Why-Women-Gain-Weight-After-Marriage?&id=170650 3) Another interesting article: "Weight Gain in Relationships and the Art of Supporting a Dieting Wife or Girlfriend" http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/159133/weight_gain_in_relationships_and_the.html

I'd say your not as worried to attract others, so you just relax...

There are people who seem like they will not put on weight even if they eat all the time. No sooner do they marry and this changes, their cheeks start filling out and as time progresses, they start to look robust. A few lucky ones just stay within the range of looking ebullient while much expand as the years go by. The piling of weight seems worse in women than in men. http://www.sunnewsonline.com/webpages/features/goodhealth/2006/apr/11/goodhealth-11-04-2006-004.htm According to a study by Cornell University's Jeffery Sobal, published in the journal Social Science and Medicine, newlyweds gain more weight on average than singles or people who are widowed or divorced. http://the.honoluluadvertiser.com/article/2004/Apr/14/il/il06a.html Guard Against Extra Pounds After Marriage: Many newlyweds find themselves gaining weight after the wedding when efforts to please their new spouse overrule their better judgment at the table. http://msucares.com/news/print/fcenews/fce97/970120mm.htm

I don't think it's a lessening of caring about your appearance. I think it's a nice satisfaction with each other which means to me that we're not trying to impress each other and put on our fake fronts. We love each other, are comfortable with each other. We love each other's insides. No need for jealousy, we're satisfied with each other just the way we are. I think if one mate is a great cook the other now shows their appreciation by eating with gusto. And the cook wants to show how much they love the other by making them things the other really loves to eat.