ANSWERS: 9
  • If you really want to get over it, think of all the reasons you broke up. Im guessing that right about now, youre thinking about the reasons you started dating. Cut it out! Write down the reasons you broke up, in your own words, the more emotional the better. Its alright if you cant remember at first all of your reasons, talk to friends and really think about it and how it was best for you. Reread your list of relationship-enders whenever you feel like thinking about him. The amount of time to get over it varys from person to person. Dont worry about time, youre doing fine. Good luck! =]
  • It's a good idea to ask this question in a larger context: one that encompasses your whole life. The trouble with break-ups is that they tend to remind us of anything else in our lives which is "broken" -- where life is stuck, dissatisfying, or stagnant. So our angst about these other areas gets "triggered" by the upset of the break-up, and it starts to look like the break-up was maybe a big mistake: everything becomes painted the same color of black. So what else is happening in your life? Do you feel like the future is full of possibilities? Are you being creative and stepping out, or are you just sort of going along day-to-day in a safe routine that doesn't really stimulate you? Are you having serious problems that you're avoiding or don't know how to deal with? Love and relationships is a tough area by itself: there's a lot of entanglement between our ideas of love and our ideas of who we are at a deep level, so a breakup can really shake someone's idea of self, and resolving the "trauma" of a breakup involves seeing clearly who you are and what your future is about. So you can't really separate this issue from the other issues in life.
  • Sassafrass is right, you have to think of the reasons you broke up. After a while you tend to forget them and only think of the good times, which is why you miss them. I did this myself and kicked myself for doing it.
  • The length of time it will take is different for everyone. You will know when you are over them, when you can comfortably tell them it is over and for the best...in a dream. Dreams are a good indicator of your psyche, warts and all. It will take time, and you will never just forget, just realise it was for the better, and you have become a stronger person from it (you have, realisation or not).
  • They say it takes a month for every year you were with them, until you begin to feel better. So at least it wasn't ten years. I think when people have touched our lives, we will never really forget them. Just we are able to move on and take the good bits into our next relationship. One thing is for sure, heart break is an utter killer!
  • thoughts are okay. just meditate them out. take up a new interest like roller bladeing and meet some new people.
  • i wish i knew im thinking of breaking up my 3 year relatoinshio but i still lvoe him , but why am i thinking of breaking up , i need to know so i can hav the stengh to do wat i think is best for me. i hope u can get over him
  • You have left the door closed
  • wow my boyfriend of 2years just broke up with me. and this is not the first time. he has hurt me so many times and he is my first love. im really sad but i know i have to accept and let it go for real this time. but if he is entering your thoughts its just probly cuz u think about the good times. but dont try to go bak if u kno itz not meant to be. we have been broken up for 3 weeks and i just found out about the otha girl who was there the whole time. i think thatz what hurtz the most is to kno i wasnt the only one.

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