- NEW!
by Lakeside on May 6th, 2007
I would hang a little mistletoe from my back pants pocket and tell him/her to kiss my ....
by gamergirl on May 6th, 2007
Ive used up all my sick days so im calling in dead
by katydid15 on July 17th, 2007
"I've developed an eye problem...I can't see myself working here anymore."
by Anonymous on May 6th, 2007
Ok, I'm quitting...I just can't take the sexual tension anymore...Of course, now that we're no longer co-workers, what say we hit the pub...*wink*
by Aphrodite loves Mentos on May 6th, 2007
... and by the way, i'm sleeping with your wife
by Lakeside on August 10th, 2007
Walk into your bosses office and say "I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either".
by Esteban-- Smartest Pumpkin on May 6th, 2007
goodbye and thanks for the cookies.
by Fun on October 1st, 2007
I hate you all, peace out.
by Harvtws on May 9th, 2007
How about calling in "well"; Saying "Well, it's over!"
by TheBlackBradPitt on November 24th, 2007
I know you said we should put in a two week notice, so wait two weeks and notice i don't work here anymore.
by waiting for a warm breeze on November 24th, 2007
boss, you're underqualified for my life!
by MrBlue on October 1st, 2007
call in well.....well it's over.
by Harvtws on July 30th, 2007
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=prBPEL2J7fY
hilarious!
by unknown on May 6th, 2007
I like the classic, "Take this job and shove it!"
by Rage Of Reason on November 24th, 2007
I'm calling in sick ... of you and the job.
by Lady Alathia of Vulcan on October 1st, 2007
"You can See Me In Hell."
Then throw a handful of glitter in their face.
Because... have you ever tried to get glitter off your face? It's annoying as all hell.
by Lakeside on June 10th, 2007
Buddy, I was too week to notice I need to blow this pop stand!
by Ausbabe on May 9th, 2007
*You're just a shit boss (only say this if you really don't need a reference!!!)
*I hear voices in my head telling me to kill the boss (only say this if you want to take a holiday in a padded jail cell)
*My professional and life interests have changed (this is possibly the nicest one I can think of)
*I feel as though I've reached my full potential and need to seek out a different kind of challenge (this one's also a good one).
by Penny The Wise on May 6th, 2007
Here (boss's name here), this is my 2 week notice.
by 0i81too on December 16th, 2007
I would come in dressed in relaxing shorts, flip flops, tee shirt and say you guys are being upsized. Forget a two week notice, last I checked do they ever give you two weeks notice before they fire someone!
by anonymous on May 9th, 2007
At the tone you will be alone...click
by rgypsy on May 6th, 2007
kiss this or take this job and shove it.
by mrbojangles on December 21st, 2007
Everything is always okay in the end, if it's not okay, then it's not the end, adios.
by Anonymous on November 26th, 2007
you're ugly and i hate my job. so i'm quitting my job but you'll always be ugly
by Nelson - Jetpacking from bed on July 17th, 2007
True story! I was offered a job by a company and accepted three days before christmas. That night, I typed up a resignation letter (being nice). The next day my boss stopped me in the hallway and said "got a second?" and he handed me an envelope and said it was my christmas bonus (everyone already knew that the bonuses that year were about $30, that's it).
Here is the one line response I gave him:
"Thanks, here is my two weeks notice, would you like the bonus check back?"
I kept the $32 bonus check and walked away.
by Amphetamine is alone again on July 16th, 2007
I'm sick of being treated like a mushroom....kept in the dark and fed sh*t
by ChelseaMark on May 8th, 2007
See yer later aligator .
by anglrckx on May 8th, 2007
This place is sick, I'm outta here.
by SG QOTABD RIP SHELLA DARLING on May 8th, 2007
tell them that you are pregnant, say my grandparents just died within a week of each other then move to another country, ( thats how i quite my last job .)
job before that leave a note on your boss`s desk saying i quite.
by Babycakes on May 6th, 2007
Thanks for nothing..I'm outta here.
by Wulfweard on September 20th, 2008
I don't need to sleep here, I could do it any where
by RIP America on September 2nd, 2008
Don't say anything. just take the register on your way out.
by mrbojangles on January 19th, 2008
Go into the boss's office, sit down and tell him you need to have a "heart to heart" chat.
Now this can only work if your boss has a significant other who you have either met or seen a photo of. You look him in the eyes and say the following:
"I just can't concentrate on working for you anymore. Ever since the office party, when you brought your wife….well, I just can't go about deceiving you anymore."
He'll wonder what the heck you're talking about and you can continue, "Well. There's a connection between us…we both feel it. It's very deep. And I feel you have a right to know. I can't stay here a minute longer and face you."
This can even be even more fun if everyone was rip roaring drunk at the office party and your boss happened to be "absent" for a few hours, along with Miss Hills. He won't know what the hell happened! Make sure you tell him that you "haven't told anyone else in the office."
With this plan, you will not only have accomplished your goal of quitting, but you might actually be able to shake the boss down for some severance pay. To keep your mouth shut.
by Highlander is semi-retired from AB on October 1st, 2007
I'll be leaving now...
by Amorphous Blob on July 16th, 2007
I'm leaving to pursue other opportunities.
(My old company would always have this phrase in an email when they let somebody go, including me, even when people knew it was basically a lie.)
by roadpup2 on May 9th, 2007
Thank you. I appreciate the opportunity you gave me. No matter what, it will serve you better later.
by garnorche on May 8th, 2007
I quit!
by -Ben 10- on May 6th, 2007
(TO the boss),,,, Sir,,,Today you look like a begger..?Am I right.
by Roidz on August 14th, 2008
It's not you, it's me
by Ash on May 21st, 2008
Sick leave?? Gone. Holiday leave?? Gone. Me?? Gone. See ya!
by br4ss_3nvy_gl0ry on December 21st, 2007
to break it to them gently:
"really, it's not you, it's me..."
by HDev is living On tHE EdgE on December 21st, 2007
I fire you of the job of my employer. LOL
by Pizza Man on December 4th, 2007
So long, and thanks for all the fish.
by koldkanuck on December 4th, 2007
Its been fun but file this job where the sun don't shine, and where the corn don't grow!
by Dusty on October 1st, 2007
I have found that this job requires more attention than I believe myself capable of providing therefore I will be stepping down in hopes that you can find someone more suitable. Not part of the answer but personaly I think that this is what Bush should do all things considered.
by Nathan Explosion on October 1st, 2007
Take this job and SHOVE IT!!
by RosieGHM Jetpacker on June 10th, 2007
I've accepted another job at twice the pay with amazing benefits and I just couldn't turn it down.
by Marama on May 9th, 2007
I'm sorry that I have to tell you that. It has nothing to do with you, you ubnderstand? You'r a great boss and you do an excellent job but.. It's an economical reason, I really don't have a choice here... So I quit
(for once, i'd like to give them back THEIR sorry excuses)
by PuppyTooFat on December 2nd, 2008
Tell this to your boss: "You, my good sir, are an ass!"
by TERRYTUKER on September 28th, 2008
heres one
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why should I be expected to run to McDonald for all the other employees just cause I'm going there for lunch?
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How do you greet a friend coming back to work after one of their children has been killed in a car accident?
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Which of the following office personalities do you like the least?
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Comments
awesome answer. +5
by MG1942 Has a Life Penguin on May 6th, 2007
You wouldn't need to say anything. Just the hangin mistletoe says it all.
Lovely imagery here!!
by suzycue on June 7th, 2007
ok i cant really top that one.
by Jane on December 5th, 2007
thats the best one yet!
by MissFerly on February 20th, 2008
hehehehehehe good one
by JuJubee is wearing a COAT of chocolate on June 8th, 2008
Great yahhhh!
by Wondering Juan on December 22nd, 2008
Here! Have another point;)
by MG1942 Has a Life Penguin on December 22nd, 2008
hahaha funny!
by JuJubee is wearing a COAT of chocolate on December 22nd, 2008
MG is right! Awesome! lol!!!!
by Galeanda on December 22nd, 2008
The answer had 90 pts when I linked it;)
by MG1942 Has a Life Penguin on December 22nd, 2008
Great! It's getting more. It deserves it!!!
by Galeanda on December 22nd, 2008
sure did, it's very funny and original!
by JuJubee is wearing a COAT of chocolate on December 22nd, 2008