actualy i think they are, it seems girls are becomnig more and more agressive and guys are laying off the uneffective chivelry, i think in time girls might be chasing guys because alll the guys are becoming more cocky because it seems to kep the girls interest better.

If courtship is a dance, then the moves are fixed and the dance is joyous because the dancers know all the steps. But yes, we can invent a new dance - where girls can take the lead - invite the boy and lead the way.

I'm a shy guy and I never know when and how to make the move. I just recently started to hang out more with a girl with whom the feelings of more than a friend is mutual. We talk about doing a lot of things (e.g., cuddling, kissing on the cheek goodnight, just to name some), but the shyness in myself is NOT helping me or the situation. I wish a girl could make a move sometimes just to help me get the flow going. Because once she starts, I think it'll be easy for me to actually do it and not have to be shy anymore because I know she wants the same thing I want (i.e. cuddling, etc).

Well if there weren't any social rules governing feminine promiscuity we'd have a better handle on the truth. Should girls and boys think for themselves? Yes. Should somebody make the first move? Yes. Does it have to be a guy? No. The only problem that comes with making the first move is the fear of rejection. I've seen a lot of guys get persistently rejected and not be bothered by it. When one of my girlfriends gets rejected (including myself), we are thrown into a tailspin and we begin to think of everything we think is wrong with us to ensure this won't happen again. So guys can handle rejection better than girls can, so feel free to make the first move fellas. However, many girls don't like a guy that moves in on them too quickly or at the wrong time. The first move is really tricky, but it is best to follow one's heart no matter what has happened, what could happen, what the rules are, whether you are male or female, and so on. But if your intentions are to make a move, and all you are doing is thinking about "moving" then it becomes less of an action from your heart and more of a strategy, which more often than not fails.