by Anonymous T on December 31st, 2009

Anonymous T

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When somebody is acting extremely aggressive, yet You don't want to hurt that person, is it possible to remain fully calm? How?

Mostly I mean a situation when somebody is acting very aggressive and You know You would be able to seriously hurt that person, if You wanted it, but You don't want to do it. (for various reasons) Yet You get this inner stress, as a defensive mechanism, that keeps telling You that this person fully deserves to be knocked out in order to stop tossing around. Can You actually train Yourself to stop feeling this stress? And how?

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Answers. 3 helpful answers below.

  • by Sick_Slick on January 7th, 2010

    Sick_Slick

    Yes you can train yourself... i believe that people can control themselves if they put forth all physical and mental effort into it. sounds like you're trying to keep someone out of trouble and they're telling you to back off?

  • by Terance McKenna on December 31st, 2009

    Terance McKenna

    when something is bothering you about someones behavior it usually it is really something you don't like about yourself,What you have to come to terms with is everyone is suffering the pains of growing up. In other word people are sick and should be treated as such, Would you hit someone with turrets or some other affliction probably not.So treat people like there sick and you too may be restored to sanity,Nothing pisses people off more then when you don't react to their nonsense

  • by JakobA I^_^I the alooney on December 31st, 2009

    JakobA I^_^I the alooney

    I am guessing that you live in a country or area where 'manliness' and 'standing up for yourself' is rather important. And that you need to turn that down a notch.

    The thing to ask yourself is "what is a productive solution ?".

    Mostly when people are overly aggressive it is because they are frustrated and try to take it out on someone else. Hitting such a guy only makes him MORE frustrated, giving him more reason to be that way. And that is rather the opposite of productive, dont you think ?
    You could try talking to him instead, get to hear his story about how his supervisor at work claim all the credit for his work, or why his girlfriend is a bitch. Just telling that will let him vent some of the frustration so he becomes LESS frustrated, in telling and rethinking it he might even find a solution he can use to get through such situations better.
    And that is productive, you might even make a friend there ;-))

    But to do it you must get rid of this notion that "this person fully deserves to be knocked out in order to stop tossing around". Because that is crap. The result described does not follow from the action proposed.

    regards JakobA

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