Is it a big deal to turn a blind eye to your 14 year old son who smokes and drinks alcohol at the weekend?
by 
Anonymous
ANSWERS: 34
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Under my roof, with my rules, yeah, that'd be a damn big deal.
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Personally I would say YES it is a very big deal but then I am not his parent.
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I think if anyone turned the parent into Child Protective Services, there would be a VERY big investigation and deal made about it, yes.
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Yes I think so. Both actions can be extremely detrimental to an individuals health, particularly since he's still young and this clearly has to be a key concern for a parent who is responsible for their child's welfare. As well as this, both actions are illegal at that age and a parent should not condone law breaking like this - it could lead to any amount of crimes or substance abuse later in life.
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It is a HUGE deal, and by turning a blind eye you are not being a parent, but more of an enabler. He is way too young to drink and smoke. If he were mine, I would throw him into Rehab before he starts harder drugs or gets into alot of trouble. As someone else mentioned, eventually it will come back to you, with child protective services.
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its not a big deal, if you want 13 to have been the best year of their life, if you want them to live at home (when not in jail) until you die, if you don't want them to finish high school, if you want them to die young ......
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Yes, if he's doing that at 14, what can you expect at 16? Heroin and barbituates? Only on the weekends, though.....
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I am amazed that you even asked this question. you have left yourself wide open to a possible prosecution for contributing to a minor, your son. If this is occurring, have you notified the police? if not, you are derelict as his parent. Not only is it a big deal, its parental neglect! You are his mother, act like it.
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Not just a big deal!it is HUGE,.
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YES. It is unacceptable. As a teenager who drank and smoked, I DESPERATELY wish that my parents had done or said something, anything, about it. There is a reason it is against the law. The law is there to protect *children* from distructive behaviors and damaging substances. Think of your childs health. Think of the impaired judgement. Think of the unhealty lifestyle and lifelong habits you are letting them form. You have a responsibility to set your child up for success in life. This is not a good start. And a 14 year old does not have the perspective or scope of experience to be able to make sound decisions like this on their own without your guidance.
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im not really sure, but i do know that if you nagged at him and told him not too that he would do it anyway and then not like you for it, maybe tell him that you dont think its a good idea, but dont force him to stop or it could get worse
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yes, if you dont give your son some direction now, then he will not have any guidlines/rules to go by when he comes of age. now is the most important time for you to establish values that he can carry with him through life.
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Yes, because it is illegal and if you quit as a responsible parent he may turn into a loose cannon. If he only doesn't during the weekend, is there anything you can do to keep him busy doing something else during the times and hours he is wasting poisoning his body? Take him somewhere and do something with him. That could be the cure to his problems.
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14's too young. 16's the right age for that. At 14, the kid's still developing. That time in a boy's life is wild enough as it is! Kids drink in high school, hopefully not before that.
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If this was my son, hell yeah it would be a big deal. That would just let him know that it is ok to be this way that he could do more things. I think a parent saying as long as he/she is at the house and safe with me is a LOAD OF CRAP!!!! Because they arn't always home and safe with them, they still do it at other places and sometimes worse then at home. That to me is a piss poor parent.
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What? You don't love your son???
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He's 14. You shouldn't be letting him think it's o.k. for him to do this. It's your job as a parent to let him know this is not acceptable. Not till he's grown, and at 14, he's definitely NOT. Take charge! It's your job.
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Parents do not let their children openly violate the law. You are violating the law yourself, by allowing or contributing to your son's delinquency. You and your son can be arrested and should be.
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Yes!
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I really hope this question is a joke. Of COURSE it's a big deal. Parents who turn blind eyes to their children's weaknesses and bad habits are just as responsible as they are in playing a role in it happening.
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it really depends on your child i started smoking an drinkin at 14 and my mom told me it was wrong an all but that was it after i did my thing for a few yrs i straightened up because it just wasnt the life for me i dont smoke or drink anymore but it all depends on the child
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It's a huge deal. I started to drink at that age. At the age of 37 after many years of abusive drinking, I went to detox and now AA meetings. This will be for the rest of my life! This could happen to your son, is that what you want?
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Anyone with an ounce of sense in them wouldnt turn a blind eye to a child that age smoking and drinking, their bodies cant deal with it, it could kill them or make them seriously ill so who would want to put their child at risk???
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I would worry more whether he's a good kid or not. Boys will be boys.
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Seriously, if he is smoking cigarettes, help him to quit. I lost both of my parents to those addictive murder weapons.
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Yes, it is a big deal. It is your obligation as a parent to make it a "big deal". Help him now, or he will have some serious trials ahead.
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yes, you should make him stop...or you will be sorry in the future...
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It shows laziness and complete lack of sense on the parents part.
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Seriously?
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excedingly
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I think so! For one it is against the law for a 14 year old to drink and smoke cigarettes. Turning a blind eye to those activities essentially is approving of them. I would think you are sending the wrong kind of message to a young man at such an impressionable time of his life.
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yes it is. You are condoning it if you know about it and do nothing to stop it. It is unhealthy, illegal and not productive. What about sports or fishing trips or tossing a ball with him?
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Smoking at 14 isn't good but it is a minor thing - however drinking at 14 is flat out child abuse. Report this person to the proper authorities at once!
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No it is not a 'big' deal. But a deal
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