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by Alicia Honey on November 27th, 2009
You should have common-law marriage rights. Most states have a 6 or 7 year cohabitation-to-common-law-marriage ruling. It should be easy to find.
by ChrisDC on November 27th, 2009
I'm not familiar with all the ins and outs of Maryland family law, but I would strongly suggest that you contact an attorney ASAP (as others here have advised you to do).
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I've got a couple of friends in the Maryland House of Delegates who are trying to change this situation, but they have not succeeded yet.
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Call Lambda Legal at 212-809-8585. They should be able to put you in touch with an attorney who can help you.
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Could you do me a favor and keep this question updated with how this situation turns out for you? If there's anything I can do to help, all you have to do is ask.
by OldCW wears The COAT of the Cosmos on November 27th, 2009
Things that you bought together, the family has no right to. If you've been together 20 years, this would be almost everything so I don't seen them getting much.
They also don't know everything that she has, so what they don't see they probably won't know exists. (hint, hint.) If they ask about something, either it was given away or sold or you don't know.
When people die about 99% of their stuff is worthless anyway, so we're only talking about a few items. Decide what they are and what you want to do with them.
If they're a bunch of vultures, they'll be after valuables. Make sure they have to remember what they are. Don't let them find them on their own.
by Rin on November 27th, 2009
where i live, in your situation you would not be entitled to have anything... because you didn't marry. so you have no say in what her relatives do to her estate.
but that happens if you live here. where you live, might be another story!
by The Chief on November 27th, 2009
Well, now, let's see shall we?
You state your own gender as "female" in your profile. Which implies that your relationship was homosexual. (You were living together as a couple, in other words.)
Maryland does not, as yet, recognize same-sex marriage. Which means any common-law marriage issues (if Maryland has common law statutes) do not apply here.
Does this mean you are not entitled to any of her belongings?
Not necessarily. There is a lot more to consider here as well. The nature of your relationship, the legal contracts the two of you entered upon, financial dealings, and so forth are all things that may weigh in your favor in court.
For example, if she was to be shown to be legally endebted to you financially, for some reason, then this may be used to present a case wherein you may be able to keep her belongings as a means to make good on those obligations.
Now, your case is INFINATELY enhanced in the legal system if there is a Will, or other such legal document between the two of you. Any legal document which addresses survivorship and what to do with ones belongings should they pre-decease the other individual carries great weight in the legal system.
by Lonely - Rebel - AYPWIP on November 27th, 2009
Common Law Marriage
Common law marriage is permitted in a minority of states. To be defined as a common law marriage within the states listed below, the two parties must: agree that they are married, live together, and hold themselves out as husband and wife. Common-law marriage is generally a non-ceremonial relationship that requires "a positive mutual agreement, permanent and exclusive of all others, to enter into a marriage relationship, cohabitation sufficient to warrant a fulfillment of necessary relationship of man and wife, and an assumption of marital duties and obligations." Black's Law Dictionary 277 (6th ed. 1990).
Before modern domestic relations statutes, couples became married by a variety of means that developed from custom. These became the elements of a "common-law marriage," or a marriage that arose by operation of law through the parties' conduct, instead of through a ceremony. In many ways, the theory of common-law marriage is one of estoppel - meaning that parties who have told the world they are married should not be allowed to claim that they are not married in a dispute between the parties themselves.
Currently, only 9 states (Alabama, Colorado, Kansas, Rhode Island, South Carolina, Iowa, Montana, Oklahoma, and Texas) and the District of Columbia recognize common-law marriages contracted within their borders. In addition, five states have "grandfathered" common law marriage (Georgia, Idaho, Ohio, Oklahoma and Pennsylvania) allowing those established before a certain date to be recognized. New Hampshire recognizes common law marriage only for purposes of probate, and Utah recognizes common law marriages only if they have been validated by a court or administrative order.
http://www.ncsl.org/default.aspx?tabid=4265
by Wind in the Willow on November 27th, 2009
Get yourself the best probate attorney money can buy and fight.
by -Icy- on November 27th, 2009
did you at least have wills drawn up to protect your interests ? you should call an attorney, ASAP
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by guirion on November 27th, 2009
How the hell do they know what's hers and what's yours?
give them a couple of plates some forks and spoons and a couple of T-shirts and say
"This is all her stuff."
by HungryGuy on November 27th, 2009
After 20 years, everything in the house rightfully belonged to both of you equally. Now, it's rightfully your stuff. They have no right to any of it (unless she had a will and left specific things to specific people). If anyone takes anything, you should call the police and report it as theft!
How do I find an attorney for my business needs?
by morgandaniel20 on January 27th, 2011
| 1 person likes this
In Ca Court, can a related party file a motion with the court to request copies of discovery if they are not a plaintiff or defendant?
by clapt on February 3rd, 2011
| 1 person likes this
Will personally appearing in court help my divorce case?
I'm in NY, case in IL. Have atty, but he's little help.
On welfare, money tight.
by elihusmother on January 29th, 2011
| 1 person likes this
Can I apply for paralegal license,if Ive been charged with theft under 5000. but i had no criminal record.case was appropriate for diversion
by Samira_A on February 5th, 2011
| 1 person likes this
Why cant I stay in my 2 bedroom apartment where my husband and I lived for the last 30 years our 2 sons are on their own and husband died?
by dontwanttogo on January 30th, 2011
| 1 person likes this
You're reading My girlfriend died & we have been living together for 20yrs in MD, now the family wants to come and take everything. What rights do i have and what can i do?
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Comments
Alicia Honey, I wish that were true, but it's not. There is no common law marriage statute in the United States that applies to same-sex couples.
by ChrisDC on November 27th, 2009
Defined differently
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"In recent sessions of the Maryland General Assembly, legislators opposed to same-sex marriage have attempted, without success, to enact an amendment to the state constitution that would prohibit same-sex marriage regardless of the outcome of the lawsuit. However, in 2008 the General Assembly did pass two bills establishing a limited form of domestic partnership in the state."
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--> http://en.wikipedia.org/.../...nions_in_Maryland
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+6 to you
by Lonely - Rebel - AYPWIP on November 27th, 2009
Lonely -- in addition to the fact that the link you post is broken, the fact is that common law marriage simply doe not apply to same-sex couples.
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You can sit theer and say "defined differently" until the cows come home -- but it won't make common law marriage statutes relevant to gay couples.
by ChrisDC on November 27th, 2009
Sorry, it did not even occur to me that dclady was talking about a same sex partner. It doesn't make any diference to me, but it obviously does to my answer. You are right about same sex partners not having any rights in common law marriage, and it's a shame.
If it helps any in the slightest I voted for same sex marriage here in California.
by Alicia Honey on November 27th, 2009
It doesn't just help -- it absolutely warms my heart.
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In case anyone has forgotten to tell you this -- Thank you.
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You'll be happy to know that those of us in D.C. are likely to get the freedom to marry very shortly -- in a matter of weeks. The Congress technically retains the right to overturn any action of our City Council, but the current Speaker of the United States House of Representatives also happen to be the Congresswoman from San Francisco -- and she's sworn that she'll block any attempt to overturn this one.
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A fact for which we are profoundly grateful. Ladies from California keep coming to our rescue. Gotta' love that.
by ChrisDC on November 27th, 2009
What Wonderful News!! I am very happy for you and hope that you retain that right.
I just wish other states would stop being hit so hard by the religious Nazis. If ever there was a true conspiracy it is right here and right now with regard to turning all the here-to-fore given rights of same sex marriage around in a spit-fire-vengence to dark ages thinking and control!
Now I will step down from my soap box.
by Alicia Honey on November 28th, 2009
Well, as someone who was raised in a very conservative fundamentalist Christian family, I can tell you that I don't find the situation quite so bleak.
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I try to stay away from labelling the other side in this, despite how important the issue to me personally. Up until 15 years ago or so, I think it's fair to say that this issue is one that the vast majority of the people in this country had never even been asked to think about, much less make public policy decisions about.
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It's inevitable that some people would react with, "Why are you stirring up trouble?"
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I think it's significant, though, that as soon as Massachusetts put the issue on the table, support for some form of legal recognition of same-sex couples rapidly climbed to over 60%, and it's still climbing.
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Now that number represents those who support marriage, plus those who don't support marriage but do support civil unions.
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by ChrisDC on November 29th, 2009
In other words, like most times in American history, when people actually sit down and think about an issue most of them do the right thing.
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The debate we're having right now is between marriage and civil unions -- in other words the fight over the issue of recognition is basically won. The question that remains is what form?
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To a certain extent, both sides in that debate are inadvertently talking past each other. Religious conservatives are understandably worried about government fiddling with an institution they see as fundamentally religious. The fact that marriage has been both a civil legal institution and a religious one is nice to point out, and we do, but given that the two have traditionally been bound together makes people nervous. What would it mean if the two are separated?
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I personally think the answer to that is easy -- many states have long recognized common law marriages (even imposing them on couples who don't want them), (more)
by ChrisDC on November 29th, 2009
...you can get a marriage license from a justice of the peace and can be married by a judge. Catholics can get divorces in the civil court system despite their church's doctrines on divorce.
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All of those are examples of government regulating the institution of marriage in ways that are either directly contradictory to religious doctrine or are taken without regard for what religious doctrines on the issue. So, in that sense, this is not new territory.
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But simply because I have an answer to the question doesn't mean that the question itself is illogical or illegitimate. This is complicated stuff -- I got an A in Family Law in law school, but it's one of the tougher subjects.
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Many people are being asked questions about this for the first time and they're thinking it through and asking questions and debating. Quite a few of them are basically saying -- "I don't understand this yet. Don't rush me."
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by ChrisDC on November 29th, 2009
At one level, I would be happy with civil unions. In other words, something that purely recognizes in civil law the same rights, obligations, and protections of marriage without that label.
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But it's the fact that I'm a lawyer that makes me hesitate to "settle" for that.
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There's a principle in the law that you only call something by a different label if you intend for it to be different. The word marriage has been used in the sense of a civil institution, and used in courts, for centuries. Everybody knows what the word means, both day-to-day out in the community and in court and the same is not true for civil unions.
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Even in those states, like New Jersey, which have civil unions statutes that are supposed to be marriage in all but name, the litigation to deal with all the actions by people who don't understand that is incredibly expensive and burdensome.
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I think it's complicating things in an un-necessary way.
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by ChrisDC on November 29th, 2009
But while there are people on the opposing side who are motivated by hatred of people like me, I think they're the vast minority.
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Most people are simply asking questions in good faith -- and that sometimes includes saying, "Hold on. Wait. You're moving to fast for me to figure this out."
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I like to make sure that I keep the two groups straight (pardon the pun) in my head. It's amazing how many of the folks in the second category eventually change their minds, but only if we don't call them Nazis. ;-)
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Sorry for the length of that.
by ChrisDC on November 29th, 2009