ANSWERS: 6
  • I was asked this question in a comment thread, and I thought it could be interesting to give my answer here and to see what others could say about it. 1) Before we can talk about a cure, it would be important to determine exactly what it is that we call a douchebag. Actually, what we understand commonly as douchebag covers various behaviors, each of which could actually be changed. However, the person would have to collaborate, which could in some cases be a major problem. "Douchebag, or simply douche, is considered to be a pejorative term in North America and other English speaking countries. In some English speaking countries the term is not well known. The slang usage of the term dates back to the 1960s. The term implies a variety of negative qualities, specifically arrogance and engaging in obnoxious and/or irritating actions without malicious intent. It is generally used for males only." Source and further information: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Douche "douchebag (plural douchebags) (US, slang) A jerk; a mean or rude person." Source and further information: http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/douchebag 2) "- The Egocentric Douchebag: The child who screams "Look at me! Look at me!" is all grown up and he can't wait to tell you about himself. [...] Histrionic Personality Disorder or HDP. The disorder is characterized as an overwhelming desire to be noticed and willingness to engage in any attention-seeking behavior.[...] The disease is not socially debilitating, since most sufferers maintain good networking skills, but they manipulate these relationships in a way that brings notice only to themselves. Thusly, sufferers of the disease tend to pass their suffering onto us." "- The Weightlifting Douchebag: this guy's artificially tanned muscles are his full-time job. Muscle Dysmorphia or what is commonly referred to as "Bigorexia". This mental illness is seen as a male inverse of anorexia, except this disease lands you in a sideshow for freaks instead of the fashion runway (Yes, we know not all top models are anorexics. Some just do coke). Researches believe that the roots of both self-perception disorders come in early adolescences. While girls are dreaming of lounging poolside in Barbie's dream house, men want to be tearing down Cobra's infantry as a G.I. Joe." "- The Drunken Douchebag: This heavy-drinking ass stumbles around parties, slobbering on strangers and telling people how buzzed he is... after two beers. [...] This guy displays signs of what is known as the Mallenby effect. Basically, this causes a person to overestimate the effects of alcohol during the first few drinks (called the "absorption phase" by people who study drunkenness) and will underestimate them later in the night (during the "elimination phase")." "- The Raging Douchebag: Don't step on his shoes, don't make incidental eye contact and don't talk to his girlfriend. [...] It doesn't take a whole lot to set this type of guy off, and after he's pissed, screaming and swinging you'll wish you'd actually done something worthy of such a tantrum. [...] This is a classic case of Intermittent Explosive Disorder or IED. This guy is a time bomb, and nobody can see the timer but him--he can go off at any moment. Although his aggression normally isn't life threatening, it's really fucking irritating. Medically diagnosed IED is defined as a behavioral disorder characterized by repeated episodes of aggressive and violent outbursts grossly out of proportion to the situation." -"- The Aging Douchebag: It seems no matter where you go there's a grumpy asshole making things awkward for everybody. He won't hesitate to tell you about how much better things were in the past, before the whole world turned against him. This man is suffering from what is known as andropause or "male menopause." It's a frustrated state accompanied by anxiety and anger resulting from a lack of testosterone, the production of which diminishes in midlife. The term "male menopause" can also be used as an early detection method, since most men with IMS will hear this term and respond with a loud grunt while shouting about "New Age psychobabble bullshit."" Source and further information: http://www.cracked.com/article_15822_5-douchebag-behaviors-explained-by-science.html
  • Stop drinking vinegar.
  • Tell them that their personality needs recycling. Convince them that today isn't 1959. Tell them that if they keep acting like a jerk that they would be better off embalmed.
  • Well, I have never met a real douche or enema bag nearly as irritating ass the humans who are given that name. Maybe flushing with lots of fluids would help wash away the rotten personality.
  • I have zero clue what that means. I have heard people call other people douchebags and I gather it is not complimentary. Could you please enlighten me? Happy Monday and thank you! :)
  • I have nothing I can say here after reading your answer. I should have answered this before I read yours. No points needed here...I can only say Thank you for the Great Question and answer. Laughing is good for the soul!

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