- NEW!
by -NUNYA-- on October 20th, 2009
There are SO MANY BUTTONS! Wonder what will happen if I push this one? Where is the gas pedal on this thing? +5
by calicorey on October 20th, 2009
Hey pour me another drink before we take this crate up in the air! Last time we barely landed safely and I need a stiff one to calm my nerves!!!
by EmptyWallet on October 20th, 2009
"Hey look! A flock of sea---Oh SHIT!!"
by -Icy- on October 20th, 2009
does anyone have the flight manuel for this new model.
by weatherman taking week or so off on October 20th, 2009
HOUSTON - WE HAVE A PROBLEM......
by Mavericks just doin a flyby on October 20th, 2009
Ladies and gentleman pay no attention to the oxygen mask that have just deployed, Go ahead and stick your heads between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye.
by PrairieWind on October 20th, 2009
Ladies and Gentlemen:
We will be returning to the Airport straight away.
Please stay tuned for the reason.
by Shemarq the Wamama on October 20th, 2009
Something in Arabic (on an American flight).
by 000 on October 20th, 2009
oh darn - not again.....
by Bluemuun on October 20th, 2009
Is there a pilot on board?
by Gnome of Kevonia is a Cheerwine junkie on October 20th, 2009
I'm jumpin' out!
by philosopher-saint on October 20th, 2009
"My wife just left me for my brother and I drank way too much cough syrup this morning."
;-)
by CaptainHarley adores his life penguin on October 20th, 2009
"I apologize, ladies and gentlemen, but our flight has had an unscheduled diversion to Afganistan."
by Gene H on October 20th, 2009
Jus' shit bag an relacks everbody. We're gonna ride this hog right down to Atlanda. Wait. Dallas. Hey, Chet, wake up! Where we goin'?
by Thriftymaid on October 20th, 2009
BRACE FOR IMPACT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
by john pennington on October 20th, 2009
"Ladies and Gentlemen, may i have your attention please.
This is your Captain speakeing. the co-pilot and i have a serious case of diaherra. we cannot leave the cocpit for fear of body gas contamination to you inside the plane. we both are dizzy and the airplane is on automatic pilot. we both feel as though we could have projectile vomiting at any moment. this could short out all the electronic components in the aircraft. our fuel supply is nearing empty and the nearest airport is 650 miles away. our body temperature is rising and our clothes are soaked with sweat. we are trying to hold our composure. sorry to say this, but birds have just deficated on the windshied and the washer fluid has leaked out. basically, we are in trouble. i am about to drop the oxygen masks, so the smell will not overcome you. feel free to use the barf bags in front of you. we may make it and we may not. i feel as though worms are eating inside my body. is there a doctor onboard? if so, would you assist those that wish to commit suicide"?
by Jacques on October 20th, 2009
"And we are now beginning our descent into the Pacific ocean."
by Fiddle Playing Creole Bastard on October 20th, 2009
"I'm so trashed right now...."
by philosopher on October 20th, 2009
Please remain in your chair and put your seat belt on. That was my flight home from California. All Five hours.
by Perryman on October 20th, 2009
"This isn't like that flight simulator thingy at all!"
by Observer on October 20th, 2009
We forgot to fill up the plane....
by RC loves ice cream on October 20th, 2009
Empty?!?! What do you mean empty? I thought you were the one supposed to fill up! Hold on, is this microphone on?
by jeanie16 on October 20th, 2009
F*** !!! was that the engine that just ..........
by Chicago Lady on October 20th, 2009
Attention all passengers. This is your Captain speaking. We have lost all instruments and radio contact. We will be making a water landing in the mid-Atlantic. Try to remain calm. Please take your seats, secure your seatbelts, and return your trays to the upright position...
+5 keithold!
by BigDaddyBS on October 20th, 2009
"Ladies and gentlemen... We're going to have to land at an alternate airport. This is only a safety precaution. Please return to your seats, and put your seatbelts on."
*Amid the sounds of damn-near every alarm you MIGHT hear in an airplane cockpit, and the co-pilot in the background shouting "Mayday Mayday"*
by SalientAlien on October 20th, 2009
'Uh, folks, seeing as we're all going to die in a few moments, I'd like to apologize to SalientAlien for screwing his wife last night. If I had known this would happen, I probably wouldn't have done it. Sorry.'
by bye bye on October 20th, 2009
These people think I'm an airline captain. Lolz
by Rollie on October 20th, 2009
Where the He** are supposed to go again? How do I find that??
by Derf on October 20th, 2009
Oh $@&#
by -Slick- on October 20th, 2009
That one of the engines is not working. +5
by IrnRose on October 20th, 2009
oops
by john pennington on October 21st, 2009
2nd Answer.
"Ladies and gentlemen, this is the captain speaking. the co-captain and i have have just discovered that we are allergic to plastic dust. this is a new airplane and we have been sneezing our heads off. we both have taken Benadryl. our sneezing is better, but the Benadryl has made us drowsy. for your safety, the plane is now on cruise control. a rookie flight attendant is in control of the airplane. we are sorry for the inconvenience. goodnite".
by Sherri on October 21st, 2009
"Ladies and Gentlemen: Would anyone like to congratulate me on my first real flight in a real airplane? If this flight is successful, I get my pilot's wings."
by Dr_Dredd on November 15th, 2009
Oooh.... look at all the blinking and flashing lights!
by TheJoker on October 21st, 2009
Giggity giggity goo!
What is the average salary of the cabin crew at Air Asia?
by Answerbag Staff on June 16th, 2010
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Would you fly nude on an airline if it sped up security checks and made air travel safer?
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Is it cheaper from Vancouver to London return, as the fare from London to Vancouver is $780?
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A French court found Continental guilty of causing the crash of a concorde. Will United share the damages and is this a French coverup?
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Comments
LOL, what a thought
by jeanie16 on October 20th, 2009
Not encouraging Nunya.
by keithold is a prodigal bagger on October 20th, 2009