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Is there anything illegal to do to a goldfish?

By malevolentbutticklis Asked Sep 17 2009 6:46PM
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Top Answer out of 14

by Esteban-- better than ever. on Sep 17, 2009 at 6:55 pm Permalink

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allowing them to race Nascar vehicles without training/
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Avatar malevolentbutticklis Sep, 17 2009 at 06:57 PM
What about with training?
Avatar overeducated Sep, 17 2009 at 07:05 PM
good answer!
Avatar Esteban-- better than ever. Sep, 17 2009 at 09:53 PM
improbable

Answer 2 out of 14

by Isz on Sep 17, 2009 at 6:48 pm Permalink

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Smoke it
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Answer 3 out of 14

by t3naciousV on Sep 17, 2009 at 6:47 pm Permalink

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sodomy. +2
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Avatar t3naciousV Sep, 18 2009 at 05:11 AM
pinky finger? lol
Avatar malevolentbutticklis Sep, 18 2009 at 06:10 AM
I, t3naciousV, wise and just Queen of the Corn Palace hereby sentence Bubbles to death by Digitus Mi'nimus Ma'nus to ensure the bounty of next year's harvest?
Avatar t3naciousV Sep, 19 2009 at 12:35 PM
actually i think if it's sacrificial sodomy, it becomes legal again.

Answer 4 out of 14

by Sandman on Sep 20, 2009 at 6:00 pm Permalink

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Those damned non-native fish are probably carrying bombs; they're going to blow up our local fish, and our cats as well.
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Answer 5 out of 14

by Sandman on Sep 20, 2009 at 5:57 pm Permalink

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"illegal to introduce non-native fish into the wild, and to introduce fish without consent."
.
Willie, do I have your consent to introduce you to Meg?
Meg, would you like to meet Willie?
Come on, now, she's a really nice fish, and a Tory.
He's got a reputation for treating girl fish like divas.
OK, then, Meg, this is Willie; Willie, meet Meg.
No, wait! Meg's mother hasn't given her consent.
Oh, I'm in trouble with the law now.
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Answer 6 out of 14

by DudeLer 2 on Sep 17, 2009 at 10:10 pm Permalink

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its illegal to eat one. because they could kill you. if you died as a result, you could be arrested.
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Avatar malevolentbutticklis Sep, 18 2009 at 04:37 AM
I have never heard eating a goldfish could kill you. Do they carry nasty bacteria?
Avatar DudeLer 2 Sep, 18 2009 at 09:09 AM
the fin spines get caught in your throat going down and one can stop breathing. an onsite trakey ottomy doesnt work.
Avatar malevolentbutticklis Sep, 18 2009 at 05:32 PM
Thanks for the tip. I never knew the importance of definspineing goldfish before eating them.

Answer 7 out of 14

by RC loves ice cream on Sep 17, 2009 at 10:09 pm Permalink

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Strap explosives to them and train them to blow up ships?
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Answer 8 out of 14

by Sandy - Sand on Sep 17, 2009 at 10:05 pm Permalink

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In the UK it's illegal to release them into the wild.
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Avatar malevolentbutticklis Sep, 18 2009 at 05:47 AM
Thanks. I believe that I am against such a law. The wording sounds like it could be used to prosecute people who had outside fish ponds or who wanted to stock a man-made lake with a certain fish.
Avatar Sandy - Sand Sep, 18 2009 at 06:35 AM
I got the wording from an article about a guy from Reading was charged after he illegally released more than a dozen goldfish into the River Thames.
Here's the rest of it :)
Derek May of Reading in Berkshire was given a six-month conditional discharge and charged �60 costs after a member of the public spotted him dumping the fish and contacted the Environment Agency.
May pleaded guilty and was charged under Section 14 of the Wildlife and Countryside Act and Section 30 of the Salmon and Freshwater Fishery Act, which make it illegal to introduce non-native fish into the wild, and to introduce fish without consent.
May told magistrates at Reading Magistrates' Court that he was left with 15 to 20 goldfish that remained brown, and rather than re homing the fish responsibly, he dumped them into the River Thames at Scours Lane in Reading.
Avatar malevolentbutticklis Sep, 18 2009 at 06:57 AM
Poor bastard. Amazing what the government has time to prosecute and what they don't.

Answer 9 out of 14

by pouncey on Sep 17, 2009 at 7:17 pm Permalink

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boil it alive, film it and post it on the internet.
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Avatar pouncey Sep, 18 2009 at 03:29 PM
I not shure but its not allowed on youtube so i don't think its legal.
Avatar malevolentbutticklis Sep, 18 2009 at 05:42 PM
... but youtube doesn't allow all sorts of legal things .... like Midget porn.
Avatar pouncey Sep, 18 2009 at 06:11 PM
..Well true just try it.

Answer 10 out of 14

by true love conquers all on Sep 17, 2009 at 7:16 pm Permalink

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torture them
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