does my cat count as a person? if not it would have to be my brother. he is 6 foot 3 and heavy. my poor legs

"Lady friend"

When I am going out or if we have a party and places are rare, there are always sitting one or wo ladies or girls on my lap. I don't know but I seem to be the ideal man for ladies if they want to sit on lap. All my friends just are amused about that. Although I am over 40, even in the railroad I had a few times two young ladies on my lap, because the train was completely overcrowded. Buddies of mine say that I must have an unvisible sign on my forehead which is inviting women and girls to sit on my lap. But I have to admit that it is usually the younger ladies who still are quite uncomplicated. Ladies from a certain level never would do that. But in the train also had also business ladies who were around 40 yearson my lap when it was overcrowded.

Years ago.....my son would have sat on my lap. So I guess I have to say him. Cause nobody else has. I will however volunteer to sit on yours! LMAO!!! (((HUGS))) Good morning to you!!! +5

About 30 seconds ago, my 3 year old came in from waking up and wanted to see, "Funny Cats." The ICANHASCHEEZEBURGER.COM site is her absolute favorite. She's learning to use the scroll wheel on the mouse, so she sat on my lap and scrolled through the pictures while I made up funny voices for the what the cats were saying.

My last girlfriend :-)

If I sit in a really overcrowded train having a comfortable seat I can not stand watching people standing all the time. And mostly young ladies or girls just expect me to help them and smile at me and I always say: I can only offer to you my lap. If I stand up only one person can sit and if you and your girlfriend take a seat on my lap, we all three have a seat. Some men are sometimes looking quite strange at me but the ladies and young women almost ever accept enthusiastic. Of course it is not quite convenient if the ride takes some hours but I can do it.

My little nephew..he's 3 years old :D

Amelia, my 9-month-old.

My daughter

My granddaughter.

My ninth month old nephew as we had a photo taken as we were leaving after spending a few days with family :)

I dont know her name but it was a stripper giving me a lap dance.

my 9 week old lab puppy :)

my 2 year old nephew

My cat.

My friend's son.

Person, my son...thing, my dog

A random French chick at this party i was at.

My God Daughter, she will be one year old in two weeks time.

An 56 yr old man , he jumped on my lap

My sweet great-niece, baby Sarah, at age 18 months. :-)

My 7 year old son

I sit on my bf's lap. He seems to enjoy that.

It was probably my goddaughter, Jazmine.

My best friend's two year old lil girl. She is so sweet :)

Santa Clause...it was really weird. he said he's had enough and it was his turn god damn it.

Back in high school me and a group of friends used to ride the bus home together. It was always very crowded and it was not uncommon for the girls to sit on the guys laps to save seats. Well one day while we were waiting for the bus I was joking around with this one girl telling her how unattractive I thought she was (which was a total lie, I had had a thing for her for years) She responded, "If I'm so ugly then why do you always have a huge boner when I sit on your lap?!" I went bright red and asked her how she knew. "We can feel it, dummy! Why do you think we keep sitting on your lap? Duh."

My wife sits on my face but never my lap. Still! I'm happy. +6

My nephew.

My friend's daughter. Such a sweetie pie.

Elizabeth Short, September 23, 1943 Born 29 July 1924(1924-07-29) Hyde Park, Massachusetts, U.S. Died ca. 15 January 1947 (aged 22) Los Angeles, California, U.S. Occupation Waitress Parents Cleo Short and Phoebe Mae Sawyer Elizabeth Short (July 29, 1924 – ca. January 15, 1947) was an American woman who was the victim of a gruesome and much-publicized murder. She acquired the nickname Black Dahlia after moving to California. Short was found mutilated, her body severed, on January 15, 1947 in Leimert Park, Los Angeles, California. The murder, which remains unsolved, has been the source of widespread speculation as well as several books and film adaptations. Contents [hide] 1 Early life 2 Murder and aftermath 3 Rumors and popular misconceptions 4 Suspects 5 Possible related murders 6 Books, films, and other media 6.1 Adaptations 6.2 Selected references in other media 6.2.1 Literature 6.2.2 Television and film 7 See also 8 References 9 Further reading 10 External links [edit] Early life Elizabeth Short was born in the Hyde Park neighborhood of Boston, Massachusetts as the third of five daughters. Her father, Cleo, built miniature golf courses until the 1929 stock market crash. In 1930, he parked his car on a bridge and vanished,[1] leading some to believe he had committed suicide. Later Short discovered that her father was alive. Her mother, Phoebe Mae, moved the family to a small apartment in Medford and found work as a bookkeeper. Troubled by asthma and bronchitis, Elizabeth was sent to live in Florida for the winter at the age of 16, and spent the following three years living there during the cold months and in Medford the rest of the year. At the age of 19, she went to Vallejo, California, to live with her father, who was working at Mare Island Naval Shipyard. The two moved to Los Angeles in early 1943, however an altercation resulted in her leaving and being employed at a post exchange at Camp Cooke (now Vandenberg Air Force Base), near Lompoc, California. She then moved to Santa Barbara, where she was arrested on September 23, 1943, for underage drinking and was sent back to Medford by juvenile authorities. During the following three years, she lived in Florida, with occasional visits back to Massachusetts. In Florida, Short met Major Matthew Michael Gordon Jr., part of the 2nd Air Commandos and training for deployment in the China Burma India theater of operations. Short told friends that Gordon wrote a letter from India proposing marriage while recovering from an airplane crash he was in while trying to rescue a downed flier. (He was, according to his obituary in the Pueblo, Colorado newspaper, awarded a Silver Star, Distinguished Flying Cross, Bronze Star, the Air Medal with 15 oak leaf clusters, and Purple Heart). She accepted his proposal, but he died in a crash on August 10, 1945, before he could return to the U.S. She later embellished this story, saying that they were married and had a child who died. Although Gordon's friends in the air commandos confirmed that Gordon and Short were engaged, his family denied any connection after Short's murder. Elizabeth Short returned to Southern California in July 1946 to see an old boyfriend she met in Florida during the war, Lt. Gordon Fickling, who was stationed in Long Beach. For the six months prior to her death, she remained in Southern California, mainly in the Los Angeles area. During this time, she lived in several hotels, apartment buildings, rooming houses, and private homes, never staying anywhere for more than a few weeks. [edit] Murder and aftermath The grave of Elizabeth ShortThe body of Elizabeth Short was found on January 15, 1947, in a vacant lot in Leimert Park, Los Angeles, severely mutilated, cut in two, and drained of blood. Her face was slashed from the corners of her mouth toward her ears, and she was posed with her hands over her head and her elbows bent at right angles.[1] The autopsy indicated she was 5′ 5″ and 115 pounds, with badly decayed teeth, light blue eyes and brown hair.[2] Short was buried at the Mountain View Cemetery in Oakland, California. After her other sisters had grown and married, her mother moved to Oakland to be near her daughter's grave. Her mother finally returned to the East in the 1970s, and lived into her 90s.[1]

Believe it or not...My teacher! She SAT on me to explain that there is NO squareroot of pie. Don't ask, I DON'T KNOW.

Probably my girlfriend. +5