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by DMAC213 on January 29th, 2007

DMAC213

Question

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If GOD came up to you what would be the first thing you would say?

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Answers. 118 helpful answers below.

  • by Skiore on January 16th, 2008

    Skiore

    Is it that time already? Oh.


    Or...

    People have been worried sick about you, how come you never call, don't you think you could at least leave a note, and did you remember to bring something nice back, oh why don't you comb that hair, this place has been a real mess, are you hungry or anything, why don't you eat more healthy, you know a nice God like you deserves to find a nice girl and settle down, do you ever think about having kids, why don't you have kids, can't you be responsible and take care of things on time, what for you just sit around all day, is that fish on your breath, you know you're gonna start getting a reputation, if you keep frowning like that your face will stay like that forever, do you think these pants make me look fat, why don't you run along now and go to church like everyone else, good lord oh my god it's running late, where has the time gone, it's so nice of you to call even though you don't talk too much, we should catch up sometime and break some bread have some wine, does your mother know you're out so late, I love what you've done with your sandals, why are you looking at me like that, haven't you ever seen one of these before, here let me give you a hug, I'm sure everything will be alright, you just sit down and make yourself comfortable, hey where do you think you're going, just a minute here, come back why don't you, now that's just the funniest thing, I just don't understand what gets into God sometimes He seems like such a nice guy but a little unreliable if you ask me, almost rude in a way, probably better off without Him anyways, the nerve of Him to just up and leave like that. Oh well.

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  • by Anonymous on January 29th, 2007

    Anonymous

    Prove it.

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  • by Lady Alathia of Vulcan on April 21st, 2008

    Lady Alathia of Vulcan

    Well, first question on the list is:

    "What the HELL were you thinking?"

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  • by Brand Y on April 21st, 2008

    Brand Y

    I guess I expected to be more impressed.

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  • by Route 66Truckerman on April 18th, 2008

    Route 66Truckerman

    Why did you create the platypus"

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  • by Piggle on April 18th, 2008

    Piggle

    Right matey, where have you been all this time - the World has gone to pot.....if you don't do something soon Mohammed or one of the other deities is gonna take over, we'll need another ark and as for your commandments - they have become something of a joke mate. think you need to up your street cred by performing a few miracles and maybe doing something about the world economy while you're at it....oh yeah and I know you're getting old and all and probably feel it in your joints but could you turn your heating down a degree or two we're having a climate issue down here ;0)

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  • by slothmister on April 18th, 2008

    slothmister

    Well, firstly I guess I should say "Hello dad, I am Jesus!" lol

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  • by killdrphil - reasonable for a madman on March 23rd, 2008

    killdrphil - reasonable for a madman

    I'd say, "You have a lot of explaining to do". Then, I'd ask if it bothers him that Talim calls him a bad golfer.

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  • by Kgsult on March 10th, 2007

    Kgsult

    wow, you're a beautiful woman

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  • by Knopper67 on January 29th, 2007

    Knopper67

    "Holy Crap!" and then "Pardon me, theres nothing holy about crap."

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  • by chocoholic on January 29th, 2007

    chocoholic

    Why did you take him away from me?

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  • by Anonymous on April 23rd, 2008

    Anonymous

      You're not God.

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  • by Anonomous on April 21st, 2008

    Anonomous

    Damn you!!!!

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  • by ACCOUNT CLOSED on April 21st, 2008

    ACCOUNT CLOSED

    How many fingers am I holding up?

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  • by Anonymous on April 18th, 2008

    Anonymous

    You're not any at all like I thought you'd be!

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  • by anonymous on January 29th, 2007

    anonymous

    UMMMM,...Im really sorry about last night

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  • by BAM@Cyberscrewed.tk on January 29th, 2007

    BAM@Cyberscrewed.tk

    Shit! You do exist! Could you lend me a dollar for this machine?

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  • by Mephistopheles on September 29th, 2008

    Mephistopheles

    Can you tell your fan club to shut up already?

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  • by AntigoneRising on April 23rd, 2008

    AntigoneRising

    Blessed be, and extend my sentiments to the Goddess.

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  • by ABnormally HappyVTguy moves to NH on April 23rd, 2008

    ABnormally HappyVTguy moves to NH

    Praise, Honor and Glory to You.

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  • by iwnit on April 23rd, 2008

    iwnit

    Please answer this question:
    http://www.answerbag.com/q_view/278798

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  • by Dazed and Confused on April 21st, 2008

    Dazed and Confused

    Hi, remember me?

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  • by ruthless613 on April 21st, 2008

    ruthless613

    How can you justify cancer?

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  • by Tony888 on April 18th, 2008

    Tony888

    Itchy although your question is understood--many plp w don't believe in God. So there joking questions will reflect. I am just glad He hears from the heart and not our words or actions. Life is precious but so often we let the egos take us to a dimension to were seeing is believing. That's why He only reveal himself to those who are ready to see.

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  • by An0nym0us on April 18th, 2008

    An0nym0us

    Hi, I'm Allah. I got 16 virgins going for me, whata YOU got?!?

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  • by SABOTEUR on March 27th, 2008

    SABOTEUR

    Should I address you as "sir" or "m'aam"?

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  • by Tinkerbell on March 23rd, 2008

    Tinkerbell

    "You've got some explaining to do..."

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  • by Chezter is going to save the Redheads on November 29th, 2007

    Chezter is going to save the Redheads

    "You know all those nights I said 'Oh god!' with my girlfriend, it's just something I say, I wasn't really thinking of you. Ya know...if that's why you're here."

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  • by broken on October 31st, 2007

    broken

    I don't think I'd be able to say anything.

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  • by rawr.760 on October 31st, 2007

    rawr.760

    Hi. :)

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  • by Anonymous on March 10th, 2007

    Anonymous

    Oh my God!

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  • by Anonymous on March 10th, 2007

    Anonymous

    Forgive me

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  • by unforgiven on March 10th, 2007

    unforgiven

    forgive me father, i am not worthy to be with you.

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  • by Sgt Churba - Rational Response Squad on January 29th, 2007

    Sgt Churba - Rational Response Squad

    Probably "G'day boss, How's Tricks?"

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  • by jfl1282 on January 29th, 2007

    jfl1282

    i'd say, "damn I must be dead, that sucks cuz i had a lot to life for =o("

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  • by The_Professional on January 29th, 2007

    The_Professional

    Now you show yourself - just I was getting everything under control and I didn't need you.

    Some fairwether friend you are.

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  • by timetogetserious on January 29th, 2007

    timetogetserious

    G'day

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  • by JakobA I^_^I the alooney on May 15th, 2009

    JakobA I^_^I the alooney

    What a surprice. I never expected to see you here.

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  • by Timjon on May 15th, 2009

    Timjon

    I would fall down at His feet and say, "My Lord and my God."

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  • by Eazyseph on June 9th, 2009

    Eazyseph

    Make me a grill cheese sammich.

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  • by Ditto on June 9th, 2009

    Ditto

    "It wasn't me..."

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  • by Anonymous on March 10th, 2009

    Anonymous

    whats with the talking snake...whats that about?

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  • by chris313 on May 15th, 2009

    chris313

    Is there only one of you?????

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  • by thedemonmarchosias on March 11th, 2009

    thedemonmarchosias

    i'd call him/her/it an a$$h0le because if he/she/it is supposed to be omnipotent and yet did nothing to improve things than that indeed is what they are.

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  • by roryg18 on April 7th, 2009

    roryg18

    holy shit you are real

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  • by VoodooChild430 on April 19th, 2009

    VoodooChild430

    Lord forgive me of my sins. that would be the first thing i would say because we are not worthy to talk to him unless we are forgiven

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  • by schmee2369 on April 26th, 2009

    schmee2369

    Thank You.

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  • by Anonymous on June 12th, 2009

    Anonymous

    can i take your place?

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  • by senigma on October 30th, 2009

    senigma

    Hey..

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  • by XtraXtraodinaire on November 14th, 2009

    XtraXtraodinaire

    You're alot smaller than i imagined

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You're reading If GOD came up to you what would be the first thing you would say? - which can also be phrased in the following ways:

  • I'm GOD-what do you wish to say to me?

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