ANSWERS: 9
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Take your first step out of the past and go on from there..
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The best advice that I can give you and hope that you'll consider, is to leave. Because he gave you herpes is no reason to STAY with him, it's even more reason to leave. You're allowing him to destroy your life, while you stand by and accept it. THAT is unacceptable. Do it for yourself, but do it ESPECIALLY for your child. I understand that stepping away is a scary thing to attempt, but it's better for you. Once you get out there and start living again, you'll understand that it was SO worth it and you'll be happier than I presume you are right now. In all that you do, I sincerely wish you the best, regardless of what choice you make :)
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Marriage is for better or for worse. But if he had given you herpes and you didn't know about it until after you were married, then I'd say you accidentally made a mistake by marrying him. I would worry more about the child, and would focus on taking care of yourself and your child. If he gives you problems, talk to a lawyer. Better yet, talk to a lawyer anyways, they might have some solutions for you......or perhaps a counselor, for finding a solid new path.....
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Any advice that comes from someone else is going to sound like preaching, no matter how accurate or kind. It's natural. But take some of it to heart: this man has done nothing but terrorize you and hurt you. Reassess why you are with him. It's tough to get over the debt and the fear, but talk to your family and friends. Maybe talk to a counselor about how you can get a fresh start. You have put up with a lot; you deserve to be happy. For your own sake and your child's, take some strides to become more independent. It will be very difficult at first, but you will never regret it. I dealt with an addict for years. He was constantly self-destructive, in turn hurting me. It was really tough but I finally stood on my own two feet and started to get out. I don't know how things will end up with him, but I am much better off on my own for now. Best of luck to you. These are difficult times for you, with a lot of decisions ahead. Stay strong and be true to yourself above all else.
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You are not happy,and It is so understandable.I think you should work on getting more independant.One step at a time until you are confident enough in yourself to make it on your own.Lots of people have herpes,your life does not end because of that, nor should it.You are not alone doll,and i am sure that you feel powerless and trapped,but YOU CAN DO IT!No one else can do it for you,but there are people out there that will help.Best of luck to you,and if you want to talk more,just let me know. =)
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Report his drug abuse to the authorities and see where you go from there. This is NOT going to get better if you continue to enable him.
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I feel better telling YOU about it than EVERYONE for exactly this reason. I trusted my instinct and I was right. Good philosophy, I totally agree, I just wanted to let someone here know before I left "The Bag".
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Well herpes is a private matter between you and your doctor, so don't think you have to lock yourself away because of that! It is hard to start over, and the older you get the less confident you will be....so don't leave it any longer. The credit card debt can be a killer, but go to your credit provider and talk to them. If the worst comes to the worst you may have to declare yourself bankrupt to get rid of it. You don't have a life in your present situation, so take your child and go. Whatever happens after that surely can't be much worse than the life you have now; If you don't have family to help, go to a women's refuge and they will steer you in the right direction. Good luck. I've been there.
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It's hard to get out but it's way better than staying. I have experience in this area. You need all your resources around you. Friends, family and even your doctor. You can get through it. Your children need you to show them how to be a strong, good mom who can give them a stable home. It is for their future. We will cheer you on. Best luck to you mama.
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