It is probaably a combination of the two, but probably leans more toward not feeling loved as a youngster.

Yeah it could be,both of my parents split up when i was 2 and my mom remarried to a ass hole.I have never recieved a hug in my life from neither of my parents,i have seen my dad 4 times since i was 5 and my mom is a selfish snob.Im not gonna lie i am very depressed 2 cause of them reasons and all i pretty much have anymore is my girlfriend.my worst fear is being alone and without her i wouldnt know what to do cause she was the only one who has given me affection, and when i first started seeing her,i pushed all of that away cause i was never used to it.i honestly think it is the way you were raised,im kinda really in the same situatin ,but right now it is really bad.

It's possible that it could be both. My situation was different from yours, but similar. My mom was around at night but, there were times that she took on a second job and when she attended school that she wouldn't be around in the evening or on the weekends as much. My grandmother took care of me a lot. My dad wasn't around as much as he could have been for living in the same city. I, too, suffer from depression that is genetic and that stems from my childhood. The one thing that my mother made sure of was her affection for me. She always showered me with hugs and kisses and we told each other everyday that we loved each other - still do. That probably kept by depression from being very severe.

I think that you need to speak to a dr. about your emotional issues. I know it's hard and probably the last thing you want to do on Earth, but trust me I know from expierence what depression is a horrible thing that will crush you, and ruin your life. Especialy if you are thinking of having a baby. You need to get this in order before you do so. I have suffered with depression for years before doing anything about it. Mine is caused by the way I was raised, and because both my parents have bi-polar disorder (which thankfuly I escaped from having). But please sweetie, think about getting yourself some help.

Don't blame it on yourself. Sometimes depression can be genetic and it also can be from how you may feel valued in life. I had a similar upbringing but my parents didn't split until I was 11. My mom was bitter for years and I didn't see much of my dad so I hung with my friends who were really who I trusted and relied on through my teenage years. I can be funny and easy to get along with but at times I get depressed because I think I missed some basics in life. My dad died in 2003 and it was even harder because we never really knew each other. You might feel the same but you can turn that around with others who care. I have had better "family" in my friends through the years.

Amanda, All kids need a warm, loving environment to grow up in -- it's like the nutrient fluid womb of childhood. Without that, the young personality twists itself up into knots trying to find love: trying to be somebody lovable, basically. Of course, all children are lovable and deserve to have that environment, but not all parents are able and willing to provide it -- often they have their own serious problems, and many of these parents had the same trouble in their own childhood: it's a multi-generational cycle of neglect. You're too old to go back now, obviously. You can't redo your childhood. But it wasn't your fault -- you did the best you could as a kid to try to work around the lack of nurturing. Now as an adult, there are things you can do to untangle some of the knots that formed. There's plenty of self-help resources available, you can start therapy, meditation, etc. Lots of adults are in this same position, and learn to take it on themselves, understanding that it's too late to redo, so a certain amount of UNDO is required. The good news is that it IS possible to untangle that mess and be free, and to discover within yourself the true source of love and wholeness. But don't waste any time... this takes effort and persistence.