I don't think it's at all strange and I'm sure I would be the same way.

How close is close for you? Can you be a little specific?I don't get anyone who asks for closeness with his daughter-in-law. What kind of closeness are you talking of? Care to enlighten?

It's not strange (as in socially unacceptable). It's rare and admirable.

Heavens no. I see no reason to expunge her from your life because of failings in your son

No. I've known of similar situations. Some people connect and care about each other, even if the person who introduced them is no longer in the picture. I think it's very admirable that you continue this relationship, it's good for you, your daughter-in-law and her children.

No way, if you became friends with her, then why should you stop because your son decided he didn't want to stay with her? Its awesome that you are so supportive of her and the kids!

It is not strange at all. It is not common, but I have known other cases. And I consider it a very good thing, for both you and your grandchildren, that you are all on good terms. Stick with it.

Not at all, I thinks it's great you still have contact with her, go for it I say...

No Lady. I'll bet she appreciates that.

No, I think it is great that she still has someone, especially if she is the mother of your grandchildren. It's difficult enough being separated from your spouse--but losing his family is just as tough.

It is honorable and respectful.

No, I think it's great that you guys are close.

No. In fact, I think it's laudable. Your duty, at this point, is to be a good grandmother for the children. You can "stick a fork" in your son. He's done cooking now -- for better or worse.

No, I think it's wonderful. I know people who are still friends with their former mother in laws. Just because one person calls it quits, it shouldn't mean that everyone should sever ties.

my dad didint exactly abandon us but him and my mother arent together and mom and grams are the best of friends

its not strange at all my mom is friends with a few of my x's

Not at all. My stepfather abandoned mom and me, but my mother remained close to his mother until the day she (my mother) died. Gram is my only remaining grandparent, in her late nineties.

I would say so. My sister has a very close relationship with her ex-inlaws. They get together every once in a while and she has stayed overnight at their home.

It's fine if he did indeed abandon them. However, if he divorced her with perfectly good cause then I think it would be insulting to your son to carry on a close relationship with her (not talking about the kids, just her). I qualify that statement because I divorced my wife after she deliberately commited some very mean and painful acts in our marriage, and my parents love her more than me. They don't even try to hide it. It hurts me very deeply.

With your daughter-in-law, maybe, but then, you met her x years ago, and grew to love her. The kids are another tie you have with her, unless they were hers before your son and she became involved, but even then, there are many people who simply love kids, especially those they believe will be a part of their lives for a VERY long time (when they were together). At this point, you have no familial relationship with her, except that she's the mother of your blood grandchildren (right?), which again can be VERY powerful, and, if nothing else, can be a wonderful friendship. Actually, it's refreshing that this relationship. It can be difficult to maintain during family get-togethers (if you wanted to invite her, how would your son and his probable new gf/wife react) or the kids (if he wants absolutely nothing to do with them), but it's your prerogative. You just have to make sure that your son understands that your grandchildren mean a lot to you, and his ex is not manipulating you into this friendship. (Since you state he "abandoned" them, rather than "divorced" her, I think it gives us all a better sense of how you feel about it. AND, if the children were his, therefore your "blood" grandchildren, he should understand at least your relationship to her.) If they DO get divorced (assuming they didn't, yet) and he gets another wife and family (kids) then you have to be sure that you don't treat (or love) her children any differently than you do the new ones. If he's gone from all of your lives, then you shouldn't have any worries about this relationship, since he also abandoned YOU, far as I'm concerned. Good luck! ;-)

Nope My best friend lives with her husband, children and Mother In Law and her husbands mother tells her all the time If they get divorced her and the kids stay and out he goes

I think it's great - good for you. You still want to be a grandma.

i think there's absolutely nothing strange about your relationship with your daughter-in-law. it seems rather sweet.

There is nothing wrong with that. I just hope that my mother would do the same thing, and knowing her she would. You are doing a great thing.

It depends on how you mean close relationship. If it is simply a father-in-law to daughter-in-law relationship, then it is okay, but if it is more than that, such as sexual, then it is not okay. She is the mother of your grandchildren and that would be morally wrong.

No not at all it is a common thing in my family. If a grandmother disagrees with what her son /daughter has done and they wish to continue seeing their grandchildren it would seem the road of common sense to me.

No that is not strange, although there are some closed minded people that might think so. I find it admirable and caring and we need more people like you in this world. Happy Holidays.

Certainly not. I think it's wonderful that you maintain a bond and keep the family together as much as you can. I adored my step-mother even though my father and half-sister rejected her. Had she still been alive today we would still be good friends.

Its amazing.... but its kind of sad that sticking by your family is considered an amazing thing in today's society. You son invited this girl into your lives. Just because he abandoned them does not mean you were in any way obligated to follow your son. Of course you still care for them and consider them family. So no its not strange, at all...

not at all. just because he lost interest in his relationship shouldn't affect your feelings toward her.

Hell no She has your grand babies! If I were you I would wedge my boot up my son's ass!

No not at all, but how close are we talking? Just a friendship relationship is great, she has your grandkids, so its great to be support for her and the kids. If its something more than its not ok.

I don’t see any wrongdoing, she was part of a family and if she accepted in keeping this relation with you it means she still wants to be a part of it. (I am not talking about sexual relations which is considered a wrongdoing but normal relations).

No. You just feel sorry for her.

Not at all. You can love her in a different way than you do your son. People need support.

If you are fishing for a compliment you get mine, ma'am. That is admirable. And, shows that you have a lot more class than your son. I look at it as: Once you accepted her into your home as your daughter-in-law and the mother of your grandchildren, she was another child to you. I don't know if it's still so but my understanding was that even after divorce you are still related to your in-laws. Anyhow, shows you have class!

This woman will always be the mother of your grandchildren so I think it is wonderful that you both get along. If your son does not want anything to do with her and his children, it is really sad because he will be missing out on the special times in the lives of his offspring.

Ew. I'll keep an eye out.

Define STRANGE...........

it depends how close, but no, it was your sons idea to abbandon her and his kids, and u and ur wife (if married) can take good care of her.

its okay to be friends with anyone. I think thats what this world really needs, more friends.

no i think thats really nice of you to be there for her and there is nothing wrong with you having a good relationship with her she is after all the mother of youre grandchildren.

why would that be strange? Having a relationship that is positive with anyone is a good thing.

Of course not Why would nyou allow your son, or anyone for that matter define your relationships?

No way you can have anamzing time and give love to them so that way they give them the love that he gave up giving when he left

I think it's commendable Yarnlady! It's great for your grandkids to see you two being close! Wonderful example to set!!

I don't think so. I am still close to my ex mother-in-law but my ex-husband no longer speaks to any of his family.

i think it is wonderful that you are still close to your daughter in law. kids need all the family they can get.

No thank you for taking your son's responsibilites to his kids up. She is your family and family should help family.