• There was this guy named Darwin, and he was walking down a dark alleyway when he came across a tall man wearing a black coat. Feeling nervous, Darwin, turned to run away, and as soon as he turned around, the man stabbed him in the back and buried him, but couldn't handle the guilt so went and lived in northern Canada as an ice hermit. The End. hey, I tried
  • I went to the grocery store and bought a pork roast. It seemed "different". I thought it was just fresher than usual. When I took it home to cook it, I unwrapped it and noticed it had a different texture and was pinker than normal pork. It was kind of a pale pink. Well what the heck. It was sirloin tip and I'd never bought that kind--I was used to the cheaper cuts. It was on sale so I wondered if it was any better. So I popped it in the oven. It was goooood. Nice and juicy. Tender. I guess that's why you pay more for the sirloins, etc. I'm just used to using tenderizer. Well it was just one of those try once things and I bought some sirloin chops too. Oh about 6 months later they caught the guy. He lived outside of town and owned a pig farm. No doubt you've already figured it out. He was picking up women and cutting them up for "re-sale". Nothing I can do about it now, I guess. The thing they found out is that he shipped out all over the United States.
  • One day the world ran out of......BEER!
  • The story I told happened in NW WA
  • i was running in a feild of blood michal jackson was chaseing me singing the thriller song his eyes poping out of his head evry five secounds. my legs were being pulled down by the uglest hands youve ever seen worst of all they had white gloves. i was pulled under the ground were i saw micky mouse sitting in the corner breathing heavly and rocking back and forth. he turned his head in an odd posistion to face me blood trinkling down his face his eyes as big as dinner plates. i looked closer and i saw he was munching on an oreo thats when i became really scared. ' look man im to young to dye just put down the oreo and we can forget this and i wont tell minni or goofy.' i said backing into a wall that was infested with eyeballs. he laughed evily and pulled three dead bobys makeing a blood strack. ' i kow your not because i killed them now your next.' he said. i screamed judt as everything turned dark and all was quite. when i opened my eyes again i was in a room. 20 dogs sat around a table playing go fish. ' wtf' i said rubbing my haed. something grabbed my arms and pulled me out of the ground. when i arrived back on the land agAIMN i noticed naruto and saska. ' for all thats good in the world squzze my nods. pigs and mushrooms is all that is left of my sock drawer insert coin here.' they said at the same time. i hopped to my feet and turned the other way to run but i came face to face with....barney. THE END?
  • im not good at writing stories

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