My parents have both been married four times and so has my auntie,I always said I would get married once and if it didnt work out, which it didnt I wouldnt do it again. So far I havent and dont intend to. These days more and more people choose to live together, its much the same thing really.

Why ruin a good relationship with a bad marriage?

fear of fullfilling your own expectations due to past experience is the leading cause for failure in anything. the best way to alleviate this is to find a way to bring yourself to the realization that everyone fails at some point and the best you can do is to do the best you can do. Don't expect so much of yourself, and symoltaneously don't put yourself down to the point that you accftually pscy yourself into causeing more problems than need be. Just remember we are all human, and all we can do is try.

My parents have been together for 25 years. they fight every once in awhile (not physical) and threaten to leave but then other times I can see a very strong love between them. My grandparents have been together forever, both in their 80's and married young. But I've seen alot of my friends and family getting married and at a yound age too and they kind of regret it. I often say I don't want to get married, but then I see a family together happy and I think to myself I want that. And weddings sometimes depress me, I work where there are wedding receptions almost every weekend. One night the bride called from her room and asked if her new husband was down at the bar. He wasn't, the hotel lounge was closed. What kind of marriage will that be if the man leaves his new wife on their wedding night and not even tell her where he's going? I'm sorry, long answer here. I've been thinking a lot about this lately. I have mixed feelings about marriage. I want it sometimes, and other times I don't. : )

It is normal to feel this way. Marriage is a scary thing. Like anything else, you will overcome your fear when you meet the right one and are ready for it.

Unless you plan to have children, I say marriage isn't the be-all and end-all of life. I have been in both states..married and single. I have been happy married and happy single. A lifelong commitment without marriage can be wonderful..a marriage that lasts until you die is also wonderful..but more elusive for some reason. Some people believe that being married will solve all their problems. That isn't true. So if you are with the right person and you have a joint wish to marry, that's great. If not, that's also great! Happy Saturday! :)

I have been around very few divorced people. In school, I knew only 3 kids that were from divorce. So my background is different than you. I saw people getting along, people who valued family above all else, even my parents adored each other and often showed it. If you know how to love someone, and you are set in your mind that it is forever and you've discussed with him and shared your future goals in life, your value system, your beliefs, how you would raise children if you wanted them, what roles you each will take in the family, how you solve your problems, and what you will use to settle differences and you each can live with that, then you are well on the way to establishing a new fresh foundation for your married future. But you have to let go of everyone else's failures, bad choices, or mistakes. Those aren't yours.

i am too. my parents always had problems along the way and in between. and i'm not really prone to belive in marriage but, i'm really hopeing to get along in the right way, one wich feels right to me... i'm not scared by marriage anymore but, this doesn't mean that i'm looking forward to it right now... and, even marriage isn't necessary. to me, is a concept that has to be taken up to his best, or isn't going to make a god choice. isn't really going to be acceptable, neither desiderable. infact, if it isn't your best, why would you to complicate your life with someone wich seems good for you at the beginning and after a few years just everything leaks water. better off alone than i know that and ideal ìbest may nbot exist. but someone who is comprhensive, sensible, gentle, likeable and who could understand me would be quite enough eheh

I say don't let other people's lives and the mistakes they've made control what you do...so there!! ;)

There's a presumption that divorce is bad, and a presumption that lifelong marriage is good. Nobody really challenges these views, they're wired-in to our culture... divorce is a disaster, a terrible failure on the part of two people who promised to be together for life (if in fact, that was part of their vows!) I disagree. I think many divorces represent people who have grown and no longer fit each other. I think the idealistic "penguins mating for life" is something that is sometimes appropriate, but not always. Life changes us all. There's no guarantees when you marry someone and commit to them that life won't change *you* or them so significantly that the marriage no longer makes sense. That's the risk one takes when walking down the aisle, and like all true risks, it can not turn out. That is not the end of the world. Yes, if children are involved it can be painful and traumatic for them, and sometimes a couple really does need to stretch it out until the kids are old enough. Life is about being yourself, it's not about conforming to society's fixed ideals or expectations. To be yourself often means changing your mind about what you thought was a sure thing in the past. That's real integrity, not the phony integrity that comes from being enslaved to what "everyone knows".