ANSWERS: 41
  • Unanswerable, as there is no defined proof one way or the other. This is a debate for hundreds of years.
  • I say both...
  • Depends on the situation - NO Beating at all -- Spoil the Child and you have another PARIS HILTON
  • Ahh yes, the grandparent's mantra. Well, I suppose that's true for aunts, uncles, and grandfolk's, but when parents are concerned, they need to be the disciplinarians. That doesn't mean beat your kids with a stick, but it also doesn't mean to let them get away with things that are wrong. I think showing your kids love and affection is paramount, but as parents, it's even more important to be consistent and assertive with the rules of the family/household.
  • true. but, no beating.
  • Definitely false, a child needs to be disciplined if they do something bad. The newest generations of children are getting more and more spoiled and that is the worst way to be let out into the world. Look at all the greats Lincoln, Einstein, Edison all grew up poor. If you want to prepare your kid for the future do anything but spoil them. ps i'm fifteen
  • The rod was a literary symbol for discipline in general. That people have used a literal rod as a panacea for all childhood misbehaviour is more a reflection on their shortcomings as parents than the maxim itself. If you do not impose boundaries upon a child, if you do not say "Thus far and no further", then the child will be spoiled, and be as damaged as if you ONLY beat it. In between these two extremes are parents who use a variety of "rods" to train up a child in the way that it should go.
  • True, a little swat to the butt never hurt anyone. In fact most of us who were spanked will tell you we're better off for it. And we never came to hate or fear the people who did it. In fact we loved them more for it.
  • TRUE! I got my fanny whacked and know why. I've seen far too many younger kids that could stand to be better people and learn to do more, if they just were a little more physically disciplined. I'm not suggesting abuse, but good parents know the difference.
  • False. The atmosphere in the US today is of 'understanding the child's motivations' and leniency which unfortunately that leads to a bad reaction to any parents seen spanking their children. It seems the kids then get the martyr syndrome, which kind of defeats the purpose of the punishment. At a previous daycare we had our children (in a military installation) we could be turned into child services if we were seen so much as swatting our child's bottom, which I thought was a little sad. Another issue is because the home atmosphere is so different, such as so many two-income families, the positive time to balance a good peachtree stick whooping is no longer there. My discipline saying is "Be consistent and believe in what you are doing." For some it is the rod, and if it is not malicious nor excessive then that is what will work for you. That would not work for me, nor do I believe would it for the majority of parents these days.
  • True. I think that some kids NEED the occasional spanking/swatting/whatever (that's not abusive) because they don't respond well to other forms of disicpline. At the same time, there are other kids that require only a stern look to get themselves back on the right track. It depends on the child.
  • yes I do. But then when we use the word rod I do not think of a baseball bat or a metal staff - I include other things like restrictions, grounding, "gentle methods" of correction - not beating, or slapping or physical violence. And it is really: ... Proverbs 13:24 "He who spares his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him promptly" And further: Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying (Proverbs 19:18). Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him (Proverbs 22:15). Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die (Proverbs 23:13). This is not advocating that we take up baseball bats and beat the child into a bloody pulp. It is strongly suggesting that the parent must (should) punish a child for his/her bad behavior. It says it in a dramatic way, it uses two extreme ideas (beating and death) to show the difference - in better terms - 'it will not kill the kid to discipline them, in fact it may save their life.' I also balance the facts. For instance the basis of "spare the rod, spoil the child" is based on understanding of human nature 2000+ years ago compared to the better understanding we have today. But then the study of human nature is a fairly young science. The underlying principles of "spare the rod, spoil the child" still apply. Any parent who does nothing to chastise their children when they are ill behaved end up with Tanks. Tanks are the type of people who run over everyone and anything without mercy.
  • No, I don't, not really. While I know that kids need - and deep down, want - discipline, some parents use that saying to justify beating the living daylights out of their children on a regular basis.
  • Yes I do.
  • If my mother had "spared the rod, spoiled the child" I would be a lazy punk with no life direction and with no respect for her. No I don't believe in the saying.
  • Yes. That doesn't mean I agree with say, beating your child senseless with the rod, but there is a need for discipline.
  • Nothing that I could think of warrants spanking or other physical harm to a child. Nothing.
  • Absolutely, unequivocally not.
  • I don't believe it. Only someone not properly skilled in parenting would use physical force and pain to discipline a child.
  • I believe in discipline. I have no belief in hitting children at all. I have certainly felt frustrated and angry toward them, though. With the oldest (26) i even wonder if i was too soft on him.
  • Very False. No child is "better off" or "the better for it" when he or she is physically punished by a parent or other adult. It teaches him or her only that applying physical pain is a legitimate action. It teaches children to suppress their natural urges and makes future inhibited adults out of them. Physical punishment is very good if you want to make professional wrestlers out of your children. It is also useful if you would raise children who lack feelings for others. The practice should be outlawed.
  • only if they are being violent.
  • I believe "Spare The Rod.. Raise A Hellion".
  • That would be a definite no.
  • Yes, but that does NOT mean I believe in hitting my children with a stick. It is a metaphor, a trope.
  • Well speaking metaphorically the rod (discipline) should never be spared. All children should be taught to respect their parents, other adults and themselves. That is how I interrupt what this saying suggests. I do not believe you have to physically harm your children to teach them to respect you.
  • I don't believe in beating my children, but I do believe in discipline. Luckily my kids are very well behaved considering their situation. I get comments a lot about how good my kids are compared to other children when I take them places. Even though they are mostly well behaved, my kids have had their hands smacked for getting into things that the are not suppose to. They have been yelled out for being bad. They have been sent to their rooms and made to stand in a corner when they misbehave. They have been grounded from doing certain things and have had things temporarily taken away from them. I think discipline is an important way to teach kids right from wrong.
  • If you spare the rod (of discipline), you will indeed "spoil" the child. We all know children that are not disciplined and are not joyful to be around. They are the ones that yell and scream in restaurants, and run the other way when called. Let kids be kids, but they have to have boundarys. A spanking, when necessary, can be very effective. Never when the parent is angry, only on the butt, always with love and explanation.
  • There is no disecting the words spare thy rod spoil the child. All children need a spanking when they are out of line. Punishment is the consquence to he/she misbehaving. As it was said some kids do not need a spanking some are corrected by a hit on the backside or the hand. But the majority need a spanking. The word beat is what everyone take out of text. Translation for beat is different than our english translation. That why you have talk shows with kids who disobey their parents and can't be controlled. Spanking a child is not abuse. Back when I was a child we got spankings and we grew up good people with morals. Kids and society these days are worser cause no one is sparing the rod. All trying to talk to their kids and send them in timeout. It's not effective. As kids sure they will do it then when they get older then what? They think they can overtake you, as many is seen on t.v. kids fighting their parents. If you all are christians, true christians you would know Jesus beat the gamblers that was in the church gambling. This is spirits that make the kids do these things by spanking them will help the child to know not to listen to that what telling them to do the bad thing they do. Everytime you get spanked you learn a lesson that you not want to get hit like that again. We are created in the image of God, when we are bad God spanks us we are to do the same with our children.
  • [removed]
  • If by rod you mean discipline, yes, absolute true. Without it a child has no direction
  • True. Use your brain. Spanking a child doesn't mean beating the heck out of them. Physical harm? Although a last resort and maybe it's not always the answer but children that turn out to be respectful, caring and understanding, productive adults always seem to have been taught/ disciplined by their parents. Of you that think differently thats completely whats wrong with society today!
  • True. You don't have to use a rod. But if you spank them when they are bad, they will learn, at the young age that they should be learning this, that they cannot get away with doing things they shouldn't do. Every child needs discipline in their life in order to grow up and have a successful, happy, self-disciplined life as an adult. Trust me, I have lots of problems with self-discipline, from being tardy all the time, to being irresponsible about my work. I was never spanked, and that is part of the reason I'm still irresponsible at 20.
  • True....there has to be a negative aspect to punishment or there is little intensive for it to work on anyone. Never "hit" a child, but you can have the same affect as hitting if you design your punishments to have a similar affect. Banishment to a room gets the message across without physical confrontation, so does excluding him or her from family activities for a period of time.
  • Yes I believe that is true.
  • teach them how wrong your really are, so they don't trust turds. Maybe there are more kids, they will not all learn unless you show them all weirdo crap, kids tend to follow a leader. Who is a leader? They should be, but there is no way to do that unless your psychotic.
  • Assuming the rod is a metaphor for physical violence (hitting), absolutely false...unless by "spoil" you mean "teach your child that physical violence against others is not ethical, and to have a standard that they should be free from physical harm (especially from those in a power position)". Physical violence is not a synonym for discipline, nor is it a requirement of discipline.
  • I'm not too keen on any generalized cliche for child rearing. We only have 5 rules, which seem to work pretty well without breaking my daughter's spirit or causing her to fear us. If she breaks one, I have her tell me which rule number she broke (so she knows) then send her to the corner chair. No violence, no anger, no yelling. These rules are as follows: 1. No drama - this includes whining, exagerated laughter, false tears, whatever. Speak in a normal voice when you want to be heard. 2. Do NOT forget rule number 1. It's important. 3. Don't act like a goofball in class or when speaking to people. Save it for the playground. 4. Always try your best. 5. Do not make your parents or teachers repeat themselves. Granted, I've only been a father for 6 years, but I have yet to actually strike my child or raise my voice in anger. I do not hesitate to sit her down (WITHOUT warning) when she breaks a rule, and I have repeatedly begged her teachers to do the same. It only takes a minute for her to realize her error. She has never sat in time out for more than a few minutes, and it always ends with a hug.
  • As was mentioned by some, the "rod" does not mean a weapon, switch, or belt....or even hand. It, generally, means discipline. No, I'm afraid that without discipline, the child is spoiled.
  • I don't think you have to smack the crap out of them or anything. But discipline is always a gift for a child. Kids need structure and rules or they are lost. You don't need an actual "rod".
  • "I don't believe it. Only someone not properly skilled in parenting...yada, yada, yada." Big Time B.S.! You obviously haven't had children or have a disturbed past to actually believe this! I have three children, son 22 years, twin daughters 20 years. All were brought up in a religious, loving home and they all still live at home when not in college. Son has a startup career in the ministry. I lost my faith years ago ( i was pentacostal ), my wife was raised seventh day adventist which she no longer believes. My son and one daughter are babtist and other daughter is SDA. We raised our children in a loving, caring, disciplined home and they turned out fantastic. They have made their own decisions & choices since they were old enough to do so. They were spanked when necessary and spoiled only on occasion. There are no definative books on parenting as everyone needs to learn by doing. We love our children and they have the highest respect and love for us, as were told at regular intervals, which makes you feel like you've actually accomplished something. They are now contributing in their own mannerisms and have turned out to be great kids. Everyone is entitled to his or her opinion but honestly, listen to YOUR parents/grandparents: Spare the rod, spoil the child, it's absolutely true!

Copyright 2023, Wired Ivy, LLC

Answerbag | Terms of Service | Privacy Policy