I think you need a new boyfriend. Kinda scummy.

Truthfully he is your date, you should pay. I dont any men, that would not pay their own way, so this is strange to me. A real man would pay for both of you.

If i were in the situation of your boyfriend i would pay for the both of us to go. call me old fashioned but i always pay for my girlfriend, i think its the right thing to do

I would pay my own way, and yours if you let me. If you wanted to pay your own way I wouldn't argue. I certainly wouldn't expect you to foot the entire bill, he sounds like a freeloader.

Tell him to man up and split it 50-50. He can make up the expense with the open bar policy. That's what I do.

He's a guest....expenses are on you.

Sorry, but he is your guest. YOU invited HIM, and he wouldn't be going at all had you not invited him. It's your dime, hon.

I'd go with out him, have a GREAT time, and make sure he heard all about it. (Unless you had a "really great" time.) :D

Find a new boyfriend.

Well I think if he invited you to something like this, and he'd already have to pay for things regardless of if he came, you'd feel like you shoudln't have to pay to come as a treat/favor to him. But you'd still pitch in what you could. He should contribute what he can. I mean, as your bf he should feel bad that you should have to spend so much money while he goes along for free. So I guess he's not OBLIGATED to, but it's rude for him not to pay ANYTHING. You really shouldn't have to ask.

I don't have a formula, whatever's comfortable I guess but I would consider going alone, your bf sounds kinda cheap

Considering he doesn't know your brother, he isn't going for the wedding, he should be going for you. It should be treated like any other time you guys would be going out like this (I'm assuming it's a distance away and there may be rooming arrangments, etc). If you traditionally split hotel costs, then this should be no different. If the one who plans it traditionally pays it all, then consider yourself planning it this time and he can plan it next time. I can see his logic for a pure logic perspective, where the cost does not increase with him in the picture... but from an ethical standpoint it does feel like freeloading. From a logical standpoint also, if it was in your budget to go without him, then it shouldn't hurt you any more to go with him and any contributions on his part would be graciousness. I can see both of your views. Chivalry dictates that he pay his half if not the whole thing. Otherwise leave him at home and take a girlfriend. He doesn't really sound like a guy who's concerned about you more than himself. If he truly doesn't have the money, than it would be wrong of you to expect him to cough some up for the trip. It's a tough situation that will require analysis, communication and compromise on both your parts. Truly a good test to the relationship.

what a dick!

I don't think I would make him pay for gas and hotel. Since if it was MY family function and I asked him to go, I wouldn't feel right asking him to go, then telling him he has to pay half.

Thats a hard one because I understand both sides. But I think the right thing to do is if he really wanted to go and be there with you he should pay his own way.