You can't. You can only help yourself - perhaps by going to a group such as Al-Anon, designed for those who have alcoholics in their lives. People have to want to change themselves. As much as you would like to, you cannot change them. +1

You cant help them, they have to want the help themselves. Just stand by them, if you can, and be a good friend.

well everyones defernition of a alcholic is differant but i do know that you cant help someone who does'nt want to be helped

be a good friend and NEVER stop telling them you believe in them...

Unfortunately the same adage applies to alcoholics as to horses who are led to water and won't drink. It simply can't be done. No amount of arguing, bullying, or threatening can make the alcoholic stop drinking until he or she WANTS to stop. All you can do is absolve yourself of being an enabler and allow the alcoholism to run its course. Once the alcoholic makes up his or her mind to stop drinking, THEN and only then, you can be there to support, love, encourage, and reinforce their desire to stop. Good luck! ~.~ I have been down this road and it is a very lonely journey.

Thanks for asking. I wanted to ask this allso. Ive got a hole fam of guzzlers, drugies,ect My mother is stressed from it all but does not drink. Nor do I any more. Ive done what AA calls intervention for friends but they went back to drinking. Most of our drinker friends died from it. I can honestly say alcohol has distroyed my marriage(her drinking)and everyone around me. Some days I dont know if I am totally sain any more but I must continue for my children. And I do thank God for them.I just keep lovin them and tell them they can do any thing they set there heart too. I will be returning to Alonon soon even though I dont like all the rules or issues/drama. Thanks for asking

its a long and complicated process. first of all, i am very sorry if you are living with an alcholic. with me being only 12, you may not think i know a whole lot about the subject but have a lot of experience with it. my dad was an alcholic and he is absent from my life currently and probably permenantly. it causes a lot of pain inside to know an alchoholic that you love. they seem possesed. if an alchoholic is being different than he/she normally is when he is drunk, like abusive in a normally fine realationship, than you have to let them know you mean buisness. call the police, or at least threaten to. my mom was in the same postion. if you have kids, dont let them suffer by being in a position with an alcoholic. my mom has divorced and re-married and is currently verry happy about her life. sometimes you have to give up on the alchoholic and move on with your life. dont be selfless. you come first. send the person to an AA meeting. tell them if they do youll give them money or something. tell the person this the final chance to get things right. introduce them to the 12 step program. have him meet other alchoholics. seperate. tell him to stop feeling sory for himself. tell him to be honest with himself and ask him if he is happy with himself and ask him if alchohol will help him in the long run. i will pray for you. hopefully this helps. click on the link that i commented for the 12 steps.

Call you your local crisis/grief center & ask them to explain "Ex parte" If @least two persons over the age of 18, believe an individual's well-being is in danger due to alcohol,drugs or being mentally unstable, they can request for a court to order that person in2 treatment or @least a 72 hr observation facility. They make arrangements W/the local police or sheriff's office to have the person picked up & taken to the facility. ( They have the option of going the easy way or the hard way!/ the latter one involves, being handcuffed or hog tied) For individuals who are mentally unstable { suicidal or homicidal} It's as slightly different process

take him to an AA meeting and sit with em

Interventions frequently word. As a friend of mine in AA once said, "We may not be able to stop him from drinking but he'll enjoy it a lot less"

call A&E and tell em you got a new person to star in their series "Intervention"

You don't have to do anything. Just tell them, alcohol will destroy you if you don't stop. When they complain or show examples of unhealthy behavior point out that they could be better off if they just gave up alcohol.

An alcoholic who doesn't want help wants to destroy himself or herself. If this person is an adult, there is nothing you can do. An adult has ownership of his/her own body, spirit, soul and lifestyle..an alcoholic adult can drink him/herself to death legally. That is very sad..but there are millions of people who destroy themselves in one way or another..drug addicts, sex addicts, criminals..they all set about to kill themselves, either literally or figuratively and I don't know if all the love and hope and faith and intervention in the world makes any difference at all to them! :(

Intervention and counseling, but they have to be ready.

My mother doesn't want help either. She goes without eating so she can drink. She has had her license taken away from her many times. The court sent her to AA and she went a couple of times and forged the rest of the signatures. She doesn't drive anymore. The minute she wakes up at 3 in the morning she starts drinking, falls asleep gets up and drinks. Every day non-stop. She has retired from work, but they were very close to firing her and she would have lost everything. She recently went to a nursing home to spend some time with her dad and the nursing home called the cops on her. I don't know what to do either. I've asked her to quit. She doesn't want to and I've gotten to the point where it doesn't bother me. Even though she's losing her memory and can't hold down food without taking a pill. I do know that when she's ready I'll go with her and give her my support. It can't be done by themselves they have to be weaned off of it or their body might go through convulsions. I pray for my mom and I'll pray for you.

Unfortunately, you don't. You can take them to detox, and you can stage interventions, but if they won't help themselves, it's all just a waste of time. Sad and unfortunate, but true. And believe me, I've got more junkies in my family and friends- they all say the same thing.

I am sorry, there is no help for an alcoholic who doesn't want it. Any addict has to first want the help. If and when they do want it there are programs designed to help. I would start with your local Community Counseling Service..they can direct you to these services.

A alchoholic has to want to get help, if they dont want it, no help that you try to give them will help, because they dont want it.

You can not help someone that does not want help. More so if this person is and adult. You have to let them hit bottom, hard. Like a rock singing in water. That could be tomorrow or a couple years from now. Just always be a friend but let them know that you can not watch them do this to themselves anymore and leave it at that.

You can't. Recovering alcoholics are only recovering because they are helping themselves.

You can't. Even if you get them into a treatment center they will never change if they dont want to. They dont believe that they have a problem so then they dont have anything thing they need to fix. If they dont want help then you are wasting your time trying to help them.

Be supportive of them and understand their condition. They will turn on you like a rattlesnake if you try an intervention which is a horrible idea. Just try to understand them and be there for them. Don't enable and don't disable, i.e. pouring their booze out which is another horrible idea. Just be there for them and support every non-alcoholic decision this person makes. the point is to get their minds off drinking and wanting to drink.

you dont - it is their disease - and if they want help , they will getit - save yourself

I seems like everyone is saying you can't help an alcoholic who does not want help. I disagree. Bringing in a professional for an intervention has been effective with many people. Sometimes an alcoholic needs to be confronted to express concern, to motivate, and ultimately (if push comes to shove) let them know what will change in the relationship if they choose not to get help. I guess what I am saying is that just because an alcohlic says they don't want help, doesn't mean that there is nothing you can do. Check out the show Intervention on A&E.

I agree with the rest of the people who answered this question that you can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped but I also believe that you should confront them as frequently as possible. Every day that passes without you confronting that person you silently agree with him being an alcoholic. My father is an alcoholic and he is also famous in his line of work and sometimes to protect him and his name he worked so hard to make I take drastic measures. Such as locking him in the house for 4-5days with 24hour supervision until he sobers up. Unfortunately, he usually is ok for only a month and then relapses.

You can't part of the rehab process is * » To maintain an open mind; * » To attend the meetings * » To read the AA literature You can't force a person to do that http://www.12step.com/12steps.html

I know this is what we always hear, but it's true - until that person hits rock bottom and realizes it, helping them is gonna be next to impossible. A friend of my Dad's was just an absolute fish, and the guy's father used to ask my Dad, and the guy's other friends, to do something. But this man (still drinking, I think) had been spending the day in the bottle for 20 years, and that's almost the definiton of "dyed in the wool". But this isn't helping you, I know. All I can think of is for you to show this person how their drinking is affecting their family, friends, and you. I think an intervention would make sense, but it has to be carried out with love, not with judging. Give examples, offer help for them as they go into treatment, while they're in there, and afterward. (I sound like I think I know something, here:P)

You can't. :( They must want help in order to get help. It's hard to watch an alcoholic or addict ruin their lives but stepping in and trying to stop them does no good. Enabling them is even worse. The only help you can give them is to let them know when they are ready to be sober you'll be there for them. I've had to do that to a few friends and family members. I'm blessed to say at least 2 family members became sober. They certainlly are the silver lining in the clouds.

There is one way that I wouldn't have the heart to do, and that is to call the cops on them when you know they are driving wasted. They will get a DUI and some time to think about making some changes. If you do that 3 times, they will spend at least a month in jail and that will give them enough time to fully sober up and truly think about starting a new life and for them to see how much destruction they caused while they were drinking.

you're all WRONG http://www.addictionintervention.com/intervention/index.asp

you have to plant a seed, so to speak. but at anytime you can call aa and ask them. lay some pamplets around ,say you were just reading.but please give aa a call.

Call AA and I am sure they can help you!!

You don't. The addict has to want help before anything of substance can be done. Sometimes, they have to hit rock bottom before that happens, and sometimes it never happens. This is out of your control.

Trust me it is very difficult to help ones who dont want it..Its even more difficult to remain sane with an alcoholic in the house it just drives us into this outburst of anger several times. . But then again we have to realise that it is a disease and we are their only support in that realization we will have to pray for help n intervention from above only then there is hope...hang in there will keep u in my prayers..

It's practically impossible. I tried this in my first marriage, and after ten years of trying, and ending up severely depressed myself, I got out of the marriage. You may be lucky, but I'd suggest you'd be better off not even attempting this until you can walk on water first.

Not your hopes up. They won't get help until they are ready, or hit rock bottom. Whichever comes first.

you cant, they have to be ready enough to get help themselves.

That`s what I want to know.

You don't.

Listening to them at the first place is very important. The main thing is instead of you try convincing them for an alcohol addiction treatment, you should try to convince them talking to a no-obligation help line or a private clinic. There are many clinics out there who can help you on this occasion. You can choose the ones like The Causeway Retreat (http://www.thecausewayretreat.com/addiction-treatment/alcohol-addiction/) which is a residential treatment clinic, or you can try companies like 1-1detox (http://www.1-1detox.co.uk) for a treatment which you can receive in your own home.

You can't if he really doesn't want to.He has to "hiy bottom" on his own. +4

I believe your talking professional help. So see if you can find someone,that has already broken the addiction. He needs some kind of help. Alcohol affects people different. Some with one drink, others can handle four or five. Whatever the amount it will show the effects. But remember the toxic effect on the liver is very serious. Alcohol can even cause hepitis, where liver cells become inflamed and die. If I were you I'd want to pass this information on to your friend yesterday. One drink starts the craving for another, and on and on, until you have an alcoholic. Women should be aware if pregnant. Too much alcohol can cause birth defects. Even a moderate amount for the first few months can be harmful.