An escape..nothing else exists in the time playing..everything disappears kinda feeling

When I play guitar, I usually try to compose my own songs. It's one of the most frustrating, fantastic, and rewarding things to do. There's nothing but the sound and what you do with it. Sometimes I get frustrated with myself and my abilities, but I can't stop returning to play. It's too addictive. Now when I have some trouble I just stop thinking about the song and do something else. When I come back, all of a sudden--after minutes/days/weeks of trial and error--it all comes together, and I probably have a dorky grin on my face when it does. I think that the satisfaction I feel is similar to what a dog feels when someone tells him, "Good boy!" If I'm just practicing, I feel relaxed. It's very therapeutic for me to play with no real purpose. You can forget the things around you and just listen. Until your sixteen-year-old sister whines at you because Hannah Montana is on. =/

Sometimes, but not always, if I'm playing a set of songs I know really well, it almost ends up being like meditation. Once I started playing one song and the finger movements were so automatic that I didn't notice where I was until half way through the next song in the set.

I can sing my heart out, following the music the tune and everything looks perfect to me. I feel like sinking in my own space so smooth and so lively.

I play guitar and do some vocals. I have been playing in front of people since I was 15 years old and have just recently stopped, I'm 50. The feeling really depends mostly on the situation. Am I just sitting around playing my guitar or am I playing in front of a few thousand people? Am I the front-man or just on the side playing in a band accompanying the lead vocalist? Am I recording, rehearsing, just jamming with people on stage or in a studio? Each situation changes the actual feeling. But the thing that changes those feelings most is how good is the music and how are the people responding to it. I will say this, if the people are not liking what the band is playing it feels almost like you are standing there naked and people are making fun of your body. So it's a mixed bag of feelings and emotions that is very hard to describe, it's very complex and hard to describe to someone who has never experienced it. I will give you the best case scenario first. If I am standing playing my ass off on guitar and singing my ass off and the people are cheering it's like I just made the winning catch in the super bowl and had the best sex of my life with the hottest woman in the world all rolled up into one. The problem is that the feeling is like a drug. You actually get high from it similar to runners high but even more so because included with the endorphins are the ego stroking gratification of total social acceptance and some times even hero worship from the crowd. You're put on a pedestal very high off the ground. So as high as you can get, when the music is lousy because the other musicians are not up to par and/or you are having a bad day it can get ugly emotionally for you. On a much lesser scale it just plain feels good to be able to sit on your couch and write a song or play some nice licks. A self satisfaction similar to masturbation. I forgot, here is some of my material. I just bought a home studio and have recorded a few things. I'm not up to par yet on this but getting there: http://www.myspace.com/texassouthernblues http://www.soundclick.com/bands/default.cfm?bandID=777372 http://www.ourstage.com/myprofile

The hopefulness that eventually I will make music play instead of just noise.

Vanished, airy, exuberant, nothing in the world could bother me. *_*