It's only a flesh wound.

And she has these HUGE.... TRACTS OF LAND.

And the entire Bruces' Philosophers' Song, which I have memorized in its entirety. Sing it for you? No, no, I just couldn't.

Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries. I fart in your general direction. It's only a flesh wound!

It's only a fleash wound

How can you pick just one?? I shall just pick the entire "bring out your dead" sketch. Man: Here's one- Cart-master: Ninepence. Old Man: (feebly) I'm not dead! Cart-master: (suprised) What? Man: Nothing! Here's your ninepence.... Old Man: I'm not dead! Cart-master: 'Ere! 'E says 'e's not dead! Man: Yes he is. Old Man: I'm not! Cart-master: 'E isn't? Man: Well... he will be soon-- he's very ill... Old Man: I'm getting better! Man: No you're not, you'll be stone dead in a moment. Cart-master: I can't take 'im like that! It's against regulations! Old Man: I don't want to go on the cart.... Man: Oh, don't be such a baby. Cart-master: I can't take 'im.... Old Man: I feel fine! Man: Well, do us a favor... Cart-master: I can't! Man: Can you hang around a couple of minutes? He won't be long... Cart-master: No, gotta get to Robinson's, they lost nine today. etc... Sound is off on this clip..

"Are you suggesting coconuts migrate!!?:

Immanuel Kant Was a real piss-ant Who was very rarely stable. Heidegger, Heidegger Was a boozy beggar Who could think you under the table. David Hume Could out-consume Schopenhauer and Hegel And Rene Descartes Was a drunken fart Who was just as sloshed as Schlegel. There’s nothin’ Nietzsche Couldn’t teach ya ‘Bout the raising of the wrist. Socrates himself Was permanently pissed…… John Stuart Mill Of his own Free Will On half a pint of shandy grew particularly ill. Plato they say Could stick it away Half a crate of whiskey ev’ry day. Aristotle Aristotle Was a bugger for the bottle And Hobbes was fond of his dram. And Rene Descartes Was a drunken fart “I drink; there fore I am.” There’s nothin’ Nietzsche Couldn’t teach ya ‘Bout the raising of the wrist. A lovely little thinker But a bugger when he’s pissed!

I wish I were a girlie. Like my dear mama.

Sir Bedevere: What makes you think she's a witch? Peasant 3: Well, she turned me into a newt! Sir Bedevere: A newt? Peasant 3: ... I got better. Crowd: Burn her anyway! ------------------------------------------------ Black Knight: It's just a flesh wound. ------------------------------------------------ Minstrel: Brave Sir Robin ran away... Sir Robin: No! Minstrel: bravely ran away away... Sir Robin: I didn't! Minstrel: When danger reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled. Sir Robin: I never did! Minstrel: Yes, brave Sir Robin turned about, and valiantly, he chickened out. Sir Robin: Oh, you liars! Minstrel: Bravely taking to his feet, he beat a very brave retreat. A brave retreat by brave Sir Robin.

"We are now the Knights who say...'Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG. Zoom-Boing. Z'nourrwringmm'!

That Rabbit is dynomite. .

Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries.

It's just a little white rabbit.(or somthing like that)?

"She turned me into a newt!!" "... A Newt?" "... Well I got better."

1) Run away! Run away! (I say this because my mom's dog tends to run lots when I get near him.) 2) Bring me a shrubbery! 3) Thou shalt not pass three . . . (and the whole holy hand grenade spiel). 4) It's only a flesh wound. 5) I fart in your general direction.

"And then...the oral sex!" That was Zoot...or Dingo...or whoever.

I like peril!

In the frozen land of Nador they were forced to eat Robin's minstrels. And there was much rejoicing KEEPER: What is your name? LAUNCELOT: My name is Sir Launcelot of Camelot. KEEPER: What is your quest? LAUNCELOT: To seek the Holy Grail. KEEPER: What is your favorite color? LAUNCELOT: Blue. KEEPER: Right. Off you go. LAUNCELOT: Oh, thank you. Thank you very much. ROBIN: That's easy! KEEPER: Stop! Who approaches the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, 'ere the other side he see. ROBIN: Ask me the questions, bridge-keeper. I'm not afraid. KEEPER: What is your name? ROBIN: Sir Robin of Camelot. KEEPER: What is your quest? ROBIN: To seek the Holy Grail. KEEPER: What is the capital of Assyria? ROBIN: I don't know that! Auuuuuuuugh! KEEPER: Stop! What is your name? GALAHAD: Sir Galahad of Camelot. KEEPER: What is your quest? GALAHAD: I seek the Holy Grail. KEEPER: What is your favorite color? GALAHAD: Blue. No yel-- Auuuuuuuugh! KEEPER: Heh heh. Stop! What is your name? ARTHUR: It is Arthur, King of the Britons. KEEPER: What is your quest? ARTHUR: To seek the Holy Grail. KEEPER: What is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow? ARTHUR: What do you mean? An African or European swallow? KEEPER: What? I don't know that! Auuuuuuuugh! BEDEMIR: How do know so much about swallows? ARTHUR: Well, you have to know these things when you're a king you know.

"Well I didn't vote for 'im"

OMG! I remember them all! What a riot you people are ! I can't pick just one. The Frenchman at the castle in the beginning made me lose it ! The cow being tossed on the catapult was hilarious! The whole movie reeks of obscure comedy. Stupid humor. .....I love it! Why does Monty Python require a "special" understanding? I live in the USA. Most people don't understand British humor here. Life of Brian is also hilarious if you have ever read the BIBLE.

There was much rejoicing?.........."Yeah"

BLACK KNIGHT: 'Tis but a scratch. ARTHUR: A scratch? Your arm's off. BLACK KNIGHT: No, it isn't.

"Are you the Judean People's Front ? " " F*** OFF !!! We're The Peoples's Front of Judea !! " The Life of Brian. OOps ! Sorry didn't see Holy Grail bit !! What a dope !!

1. We are the knights who say nicht...we are the keepers of the sacred words, nicht, pang, and neuwong! 2. I blow my nose at you, you silly English types...I fart in your general direction! 3. What is your name? What is your quest? What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow? 4. How do you know she's a witch? Well, she turned me into a newt! to name a few...

Bring out your dead. Im not dead yet. You will be. (I hope I got that right)

Your Mother was a Hampster and your Father smelled of Elder berries! It's just a scratch! Come here, I'll bite your knees off!

I burst my pimples at you and call your door-opening request a silly thing, you tiny-brained wipers of other people's bottoms!