I gave up writing poetry (or prose for that matter) about myself a long time ago. I used to write lots of confessional poetry and most of it was purely carthartic - self-obsessed, badly put together and probably of no interest to anyone other than myself. Still - it served a purpose and made me feel better by channeling whatever I was feeling into the effort of creating some kind of verse. Still, I sort of made myself a bit sick of all that - after a while confessional writing starts to feel a little bit like eating your own vomit. I pick up bits and pieces of inspiration all over the place now - historical figures and little anecdotes are a big one for me, bit part players in books and plays, fairy tales, or weird phrases and overheard conversations, or things I see that set my brain rattling - probably some of them are about me really - in that they give an insight about my weird pre-occupations and obsessions - but I hope they're things that other people can relate to and find interesting too rather than my own boring self-involved rubbish.

Most of my best poems usually ended up as Metal songs and are about my life, some became ballads about past loves and many others reflect anger, depression and bitter areas from my life and experiences I have witnessed.

I've only ever written one poem, and it is more about myself than my relationships. However, it was inspired by my relationships. I wrote it while I was divorcing. I couldn't post it under my name at that time, so I had Stableboy's trusty pet, Stabledog, post it for me last Dec (around the time I wrote it): Denied the one I crave, I'm bound to one I hate. Yearning for the safe shelter of your arms I dread Each coming dawn, bringing new awareness of my fate. Recalling every touch, every kiss, each word said Wondering when I will see you, how long must I wait? Are you right now missing me, am I running through your head? What I know is rather painful, it strangles me inside For you are not with me, my inside a great abyss I sigh a hundred tears or more, for you I am not beside Tender eyes burned into my mind - yours - you that I miss. Hope rings eternal through countless tears I've cried Your strength is with me always; I must remember this. I struggle against the heavy chains, my life and heart they bind. A legal battle that I must face before I can be free. That this keeps me from you is always on my mind, I must face his angry tirade, his punishment I must see. Before I can settle in your arms so welcoming, safe, and kind. His rage must have a victim, and that victim must be me. The wheels were set in motion so many years ago When I pledged my life to this man, no coming pain I knew. I was young, my boundaries thin, and I never could say no. Proud and stubborn, I sold away the security that was so new. It's a huge commitment and requires thought, yes, that I surely know. Full aware that I should not, I smiled and said, "I do." With those words I made my chains and to myself them bound. I simply couldn't – wouldn't – see the cage to which I had agreed. Every promise broken, each and every vow I later found. He ignored, trampled, lied, and denied in narcissistic greed. Eventually, I was broken, drove mercilessly into the ground, So that I could lie to myself and fill my one insatiable need. I knew he would never do what he said, that action matched not word, But he said he loved me endlessly, and I needed to believe. So I cried, explained, and begged, but my pleas were never heard. The need to believe I could be loved meant I could not leave, My legs would not propel me, like the wings of some clipped bird. I hid inside myself and sought in escapism some reprieve. I ran so deep inside me that in the end I could not even find The vibrant girl who met that man so many years ago. I ran so far, so fast, and so blindly, I'd left her far behind. And I picked myself up, and timidly blow by blow I addressed the underlying issues and found her beaten by the grind. But my newfound strength was, he thought, only just for show. As it dawned on him with each and every passing day, That I meant what I said, the end was one of two, His word he could fulfill without a moment's delay. Or he could say, "Something's really wrong with you." His narcissism dictated that it must happen just this way. And my gathering strength meant that my marriage was through. His garments packed in anger, he left in a fit of rage, Believing I would back down, see the error of my change. Time went by and each day we turned a page, Yet give in I would not, and he thought it very strange. I cleansed my house so many times with frankincense and sage, It was my life that I cleansed most, a badly needed change. Day by day I slowly healed and the relationship was no more. With the exception of that single legal chain, harder to absolve. That I made the day I walked into the cage and behind me shut the door. Around that man my life no longer does revolve. I vowed the end the day I collapsed and pounded on the floor, But the complex legal bit I still need to resolve. And we are now to the crux of this tale of misery and woe, For it is this legal chain that keeps me from your embrace. Keeps me from being in your arms with my heart all aglow, And my inability to say no is why I now cannot gaze at your face. I tell this story and to every reader I now show. What can happen when you ignore yourself and submit to society's grace. Not a work of fiction, these words are all very true. And this is why I cry alone, instead of making love with you. http://www.answerbag.com/q_view/101626

check out my poems at www.bebo.com/Alysha A9 supergirl - q and write my poems about me ex .