Ohh, Theres two Jehovahs Witnesses knocking at my door what should I say to them?
by 
MindIsMemory
ANSWERS: 29
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Hello?
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"Nobody here but us Satanists, and we need an offering...."
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Just listen to what they have to say. Let them express their opinions about what they feel or mean about. Just don't slam the door on them.
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who's there? - Jehovahs Witnesses - Jehovahs Witnesses who?
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Sorry but no thank you.....(ehh that's what my mom did and it works for her)
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Have you heard about Buddha? Let me swing by your house at my convenience on a weekend when YOU have kids. Then we can discuss this at length.
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Hi there, nice to meet you. <shake their hand.s> I just contracted hepatitis and I'm feeling tired. I don't think I can listen to you for too long. When they finally leave, you are allowed to laugh boisterously.
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Say "Sorry I can't let you in right now I am having a Priest bless my house cause of spirits. That will make them kleave faster then anything and they will never come back to your house erer again cause JWs are afraid of Spirits.
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Look back into the house and holler... "Honey, the sacrifices are here. Call the others!"
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after you open your door kindly ask them how in the world did they get passed your gard dogs that are not on a lesh which you trained to get rid of jws on the spot.so you can train those two dogs of your better or turn them in for news ones.
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I keep give blood leaflets by the door especially for this occasion, they veryy rarely come back. my dad used to work in the emergency room and saw several kids die because their parents refused donated blood, the hospital can get a court order over the phone to intervene but if they dont get through in time they die, so my dad has a real vengeance against them.
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Just pretend like you aren't hiding a dead body in the freezer a la Hitchcock.
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Tell them that you are a nudist and if they don't mind you were just going to slip out of your clothes. They are welcome to stay and preach but must also disrobe. House rules!
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Nothing. Next time post a NO SOLICITATING sign. When they knock next time have them arrested for trespass and disturbing your peace.
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"get back in the shed jed or i swear to god i'll beat you....Oh Hello, I'm sorry but we are busy now...will you come back later?"
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You should tell them "DreAnna said you guys have already been by her place twice this month and she doesnt want to be nice today so skip her this time" :) LOL
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Welcome to the Dark Side... Come in, we have room for two more at the Sacrificial Table...
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After a night out drinking I banged on the jehovahs Witness building until someone answered and then said "See, how do you like it?" He just shut the door in my giggling, drunken face - so much for pathos!
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If your interested in what they have to say then say "hello", but if u arent interested just politely say "O, im not interested"
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Merry Christmas! They do not believe in holidays. My 2 cents.
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Ask them what do you have to do to gain everlasting life, and ask them to show you in the Bible.
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When any unrelated, unsolicited person comes knocking at my door I politely say "Sorry I am not interested, have a nice day" and I shut the door.
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Sorry, I'm Jewish
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Step back and don't let the door hit you on the way out..LOL
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First off, before you get to the door, grab your yappy Chihuahua and answer the door. Then try to apologize for not being able to hear them over the dogs crazy barking. They will get tired of trying to talk over the dog and go away. Works everytime. Every home should have one!
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Ask them if they mind if you speak naked as your home is a clothing free sanctuary.
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I tell them "I respect your god but have more than enough for my own needs, good day." I seriously don't understand how the no solicitation sign at the fromt of the community, the altar of Thor in my font yard, the sign on my fence that says caution: trained attack dog, and my Mjollnir pendant don't give them a hint before they start giving me pamphlets... I gotta admit though, I do respect them, even if I resent them - they got some serious cojones to do what they do.
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I would yell out, "Be there in a minute, I'm still loading the shotgun!"
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Listen to them politely. Ask them reasonable questions. Then, calmly and politely tell them that what they say is very interesting. And then say "...but your lord God is no match for my master, Satan."
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