Well, my husband makes loving comments about my body most of the time, but every now and again, he will make hurtful comments. When I met my husband I was probably 180 and I am 5'7. And he is in the 300's, sometimes 280's-290's. He was attractive to me because of his nice looking carmell-white skin, brown hair to match, very attractive manly face. Also, it was his kind things he did for me, and confidence that he could stand up and protect and be direct.
Well, as friends, he got him and I a gym membership for 6 months and we both lost some weight. I got down to 170, and I believe he got down to the 270's.
It's 4 years later. We are married and I am 218 lbs. and he is 285 lbs., and now he sometimes jokes that I am trying to "catch up" to him in weight, which is actually not true. I just have gained weight for many reasons. I was overweight as a child due to learning bad eating habits, and I suppose gaining weight for me is comparable to "falling off the wagon" of a wagon I hopped onto when I was in high school. Gaining weight is my default, the place I go, when my life doesn't stay on plan or when I inavertantly forget what I'm doing. For example, I gained weight back the first time when I first became pregnant with my first child. I got pregnant and my mom and dad would make me food, and before I knew it, I forgot I was on this wagon. First thing I forgot was that I had regular mealtimes, breakfast, lunch, and dinner thus I just started eating more without realizing it. Then before long I had un-learned a healthy habit of not eating between mealtimes. It took me 2 years after my pregnancy to start losing any weight.
Two years after that I met my husband (2nd husband obviously and the one I'm talking about in this post) and one miscarriage and two kids later, I'm at 218 lbs, my default weight. And I'm trying hard to get back on the wagon again.
As far as weight and attractiveness goes, I really think I look good at 170 but I've been as low as 155 lbs. My husband has told me the honest truth about his feelings. He says that even though he is hypocritical since he is overweight, what he finds attractive is a slender woman. That is not to say a super skinny woman although if she had a cute face, then perhaps. What he 's talking about is not obese, which I think can be defined as more than 30 pounds overweight. At 170, I'm about 15 pounds more than I need to be, but I still look quite attractive to my husband and to myself. I have a pretty face at that weight, unlike my puffy cheeks and face at 218 lbs. My breasts are always staying the same when not breastfeeding, about a b cup, whether I'm 218 or 155 or 170. My collar bone shows whether I'm at 218, 155, or 170. And at 155 to 170 my mid section is flat and not uncomfortable as at 218 where my fat presses into my lung area.
I guess it is to each one's own. I personally think for most men, 15 pounds doesn't make a big difference either way, but I suppose it's how your body deposits extra weight too. What if all those extra 15 pounds went to your cheeks and chin and neck, and maybe a little bit of it somewhere else. I'd personally love it if my extra weight stayed away from my face alltogether. That's what I hate about being overweight the most, believe it or not.
This is me probably 15 or 20 pounds overweight.

Comments
good point
by bluegirl1417 on December 18th, 2007
and fat women dont look good in clothes, ageing faster, shortening their lives, and aren't healthy?
by Im BACK on September 14th, 2008
I apologize for my lack of clarity - though its been over a year, I meant that they look better with SOME fat on them. I was not referring obese women but rather women who are within at least the middle of the healthy weight range.
Skinny women are not healthy either and they, too, age faster and shorten their lives. Though men are healthy with close to 0-1% fat on them, women are recommended to have 5-10% (or something around these figures, this is off a two year old memory) and I think they look better for it (ie. more feminine, etc. etc.)
by Sado on September 14th, 2008
Man those numbers are wrong. hahaah
Not even close, guys need around a 5% to STAY healthy.
Girls even very skinny ones, have around 15%. And healthy ones have 20 or more
by Kensum1 on September 14th, 2009