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Yes. It is the modern easy way out. Having a trial mock marriage where you don't have to worry about putting effort into it, or the results if it doesn't work out is the lazy person's method.
A sure sign of commitment is always healthy. But a downfall if they break up before they get married.
I think it's a good thing to do. Can't imagine how horrible it would be to dedicate your whole life to a marriage with someone you can't stand living with.
No. I think it's important to live together before marriage so that you understand eachother better. Sometimes it can make or break relationships. I would rather know before getting married if I could tolerate living with someone rather than after. +3
You should find out whether you are compatibile with eachother to live with first, so you should live together first.
I would never marry someone I didnt live with first....
I'm living with my s/o for 15 yrs and we are as happy as we ever were.Marriage isn't for everyone but it's down to the two people involved to decide what works for them.
I do not believe it is bad. Me and the s/o lived together for almost a year before getting married and though we actually divorced in 2002, we still live together as a couple and still together 26 years now.
I seen lots of people live together before marriage, not only living together also having sex and having kids too, also I seen some married people sleeping with strangers too.
it depends on who you ask.if you are in love and not just in heat then the marriage is already made.lic.are for man.marriage is made between you two and your God.if you are living togeather to escape something else,or for recreational sex then it is not good.Years ago when a preacher were scarce folks were married by an elder. If you are in love and mean it,then i believe your are already married. If your partner is asking you to live with them and not get married,i would like to know why if i were you.go to a Justice of the peace and get married,if money is a problem
its neither good nor bad. I think its something people should be cautious of as it is a pathway to be kept in a dead end relationship, but it can also lead to marriage, or let you knwo that marriage is not what yuo want.
I think it's smarter to find out whether or not you can live together first, instead of getting any big surprises after the wedding.
Not as long as you use birth control. MANY of us have gotten married w/o any experience of the other person. BADBADBAD!!!!
Yes, I do believe it is bad to live together before marriage.
Not at all. It's good to see if you can live with your partner before tying the knot IMHO.
can't realy say bad ,better not..but ..
your chances of breaking up/divorcing are much higher-doubled, if you live together first. The guy gets tired of you physically, and you lose your mystery, and he feels forced to marry you. it is best to wait until marriage for sex & living together. otherwise, if the milk is free, why buy the cow. pretty soon, other women are looking much better to him than you.
Not really, its probably a good idea to live with the person first, so that you get to know them without risking all of you possetions. Better to find out if your compatible or not living to gether before marriage than to discover it doesnt work later in divorce court. this is especially important for men, since judges are biased towards women.
Research shows that it will not affect your marriage as long as you only live with your future spouse.
So if you marry the person you move in with and you do move in only once, it is fine.
Otherwise, research results show a higher likelihood of divorce.
But it can be good to be roommates before you get married, just to make sure you can stand each other.
Just make sure before you move in, you know why and what the commitment you have for each other is.
Biblically its considered wrong but I order to know the true person that u are intended to married, I think its better to leave together before u married. It will allow you to get to know each other better.
This is a questions I have been actually asking myself lately too!
I think that it is not bad or good, I think it just depends on the person and the relationship. For some, it is good to see if you are able to live together before you make the commitment to move in together. For other, marriage is not about compatable living, but more that you can't live without that person and you will do what it takes to make living together work.
If you get some great answers, share them with me please! (saunders.a.michelle@gmail.com)
Also, check out http://www.leftos.com/opinion/browse_top?topic_id=76 I recently read some similar things about moving in together on that site, and it was pretty helpful and interesting!
I recommend it over marriage....why? well, in all of my friendships with couples, I think maybe 1 in 50 has actually stayed together after marriage. Even the ones I thought were a great couple meant for eachother. And to make it blunt, marriage is the #1 cause of divorce. Usually, in my opinion, the threat of divorce when you get into a dispute with your s/o is much more serious and threatening than wanting to take a break for a couple of weeks from your bf/gf...therefore making it more ironclad and likely. Where a simple relationship without some sort of legal bind lessens the stresses of obligated feelings, causing someone to feel trapped.
I don't think it's bad at all. I think people who get married before living together are insane. Living with someone, you learn so much about them.
Having lived with a couple guys in long term relationships, I will tell you that it is not healthy and statistics clearly show that the majority of people who live together without being married, do not get married. You may not like that fact but I didn't make it up.. look it up!
Most of the time people just spin their wheels with each other for a while and then move on to newer things and start the process over again.
You should not "trial" live with anyone to see if you should marry. Marriage is not about how exciting or passionate you are but the depth of love you have for one another, your ability to commit, maintain loyalty and be steadfast. It would do to take your time in the dating process and in getting to know one another.
Not trial it out in a living situation in which you come away desensitized. It does happen.. just read some of the other responses.
I think it's great to live together before marriage. It will alow you to get to know each other better.
If, by asking about living together, you mean having sex, this is what I believe: The bible teaches that if you are not married to a person, having sex with a person you are not married to is adultery, and you would be going against the 7th commandment.
I think now days it is smart to live together for awhile. Divorces cost both sides to much money not to be sure of what both parties are looking for. +5
Only if its against your religion, otherwise, its not bad. Its a good way to get to know who the person really is! You'd be surprised how good people are at lying or keeping secrets. I recommend it even though Im Catholic. As long as you get to know them very well, then do so. But if you're a woman, don't expect the man to ever marry you. Once the presents have been opened, you can't really wrap them back up.
No, I think it's good to find out how well you get along before an expensive wedding and possibly divorce if it didn't work out.
I don't think it is "bad."
.
As they say in Sweden (where living together before marriage is encouraged), "Why marry a STRANGER?"
+5
No, it's very good actually.
I don't think so, infact it's healthier to do so, you'll get to know the person you are marrying minus the niceities! if you are incompatible, you'll soon figure it out rather than wasting thousands of pounds on one special day when the guy just isn't right for you. it's always best to try before you buy.
Statistically speaking....YES!
I'm not sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing. It's one of those things you'd have to risk.
One part is good because if you don't live together before marriage, the surprises that come afterward may be good for you guys to work out and get used to.
The other part is also good because if you live together before marriage, you know exactly what the person is about and you know if you can live with them.
My concern is for the people that know they want to get married, but move in together beforehand. Is it good to move in together if you're engaged or about to be engaged? What about if you know that this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with?
In my opinion living together is just playing house, if you are really in love and have a mature relationship getting married should be your desire, if you are afraid to take vows with someone then why move in with them in the first place. Living together has become so casual and some use it as an excuse to contine sleeping with other people on the side. Maybe if we all set our morale standards higher we'd get better relationships in return.
I've heard that it is a bad thing, but on the other hand it gets out of the way what would normally be those first difficult months or years of a marriage... and the couple can see if they can get along.
I think it's a very good thing. It's good to know a person's at-home habits before you marry them.
I think its a good idea. You really dont know someone completely until you live with them. Call me old fashoined but I still believe marriage is special and should be taken seriously. Wouldn't you rather find out your not compatible living together before you make the commitment to share your entire lives together? It only makes sense...
From a religeous point of view I think most of them don't agree with it my personal thought is no I liked living with my partners liked bein the word though because its not worked so far sometimes spending that much time together isn't so good but then I know people who have lived together for what seems like forever and they do just fine
I think it's a "moral imperative"!
yep
No I dont think bad to live together. I'm in trial marriage with my boyfriend currently and I love it. Because I'm getting to know real well and he is getting to know me well which is an important aspect when marry someone. Now in my trial marriage (cohabitation) I have become closer to his sons and they are accepting of me. Also, my believes trial marriage benefical because if get married and get divorced it is very costly legal fees and saves from financial heartache. Also, he had relationship was not good wants trial marriage before taking plunge and I'm family my mom stayed unhappy marriage for financial security and sake of her children and she did not want go through a divorce with my dad. When dad was younger in his 30's 40's he drank, hit my mom, and cheated on her. She stayed in relationship made bitter in senior years because her husband did not treat well when was young. I do not make mistake my mom did so that's I'm on the trial marriage. Finally most men I dated do not want continue a relationship with girl does not want cohabit because there too many divorces and liability for man after divorce has go through so wants make sure she right woman before down the aisle.
Any one else a big fan of the self-righteous apology?
by Lemonyellow Di Vintage on July 29th, 2010
| 1 person likes this
What would you do if you discover your partner having an affair while you are away and they are living together in your own house?
by Hateliar on June 23rd, 2010
| 1 person likes this
Is it preferable to have a seperate or joint account with ur spouse?
by Ishaqbarry on April 27th, 2010
| 1 person likes this
i am catholic and have been separated from my husband for 5 years and involved with one man for awhile is it fornication
by mkymse010101 on April 22nd, 2010
| 1 person likes this
We don't have the same thoughts on moving; how do we work out a compromise?
by krissieXOXO on April 14th, 2010
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Comments
Thanks Tveg.
by keithold is a prodigal bagger on July 27th, 2009
That doesn't make sense. If you want your relationship to last, marriage or not, you'd be putting effort into it.
by Elfie on August 30th, 2009
Whether or not it makes sense to you doesn't change facts. Look at the five, ten, and twenty year viability of a mock marriage vs. a real marriage. Yes, effort would be put into both, but statistics suggest definitely not as much effort.
by Tveg on August 30th, 2009
Statistics forget to take into consideration the fact that people willing live together before marriage are more likely to find divorce acceptable... where as people who don't live together before marriage generally view it as wrong due to things lke religion, that same things that will stop divorce, whether or not the couple is unhappy.
They aren't taking into consideration a happy marriage, just whether or not the marriage ends.
by Elfie on August 30th, 2009