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by nullpointer on March 4th, 2007

nullpointer

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When somebody says fu*k off, what can be the best reply be? or what would you say?

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Answers. 144 helpful answers below.

  • by singwell-is off researching a lot on March 4th, 2007

    singwell-is off researching a lot

    Look at them straight in the eyes and say, with a serious face:
    Interesting you should say that: do you know the etymology of the word "fuck"?
    Fuck is an English word which, when used literally as a verb, means "to engage in sexual intercourse". It is generally considered to be an offensive profanity.
    It is unclear whether the word has always been considered vulgar, and if not, when it first started to be considered vulgar. Some evidence indicates that in some English-speaking locales it was considered acceptable as late as the 17th century meaning "to strike" or "to penetrate."[1] Other evidence indicates that it may have become vulgar as early as the 16th century in England, although neither set of evidence is inherently contradictory to the other, since many words have multiple connotations. The word became increasingly offensive over time because of its usage to describe (often in an extremely angry, hostile or belligerent manner) negative or unpleasant circumstances or people in an intentionally offensive way, such as in the term "motherfucker," one of its more common usages.
    Fuck is used not only as a verb (transitive and intransitive), but also as a noun, interjection, and, occasionally, as an expletive infix. The etymology of the word is uncertain.
    Sources such as the Oxford English Dictionary contend the true etymology of fuck is still uncertain but appears to point to an Anglo-Saxon origin.

    The first known occurrence, in code, is in a poem composed in a mixture of Latin and English sometime before 1500. The poem, which satirizes the Carmelite friars of Cambridge, England, takes its title, "Flen flyys", from the first words of its opening line, "Flen, flyys, and freris"; that is, "Fleas, flies, and friars". The line that contains fuck reads "Non sunt in coeli, quia gxddbov xxkxzt pg ifmk". Removing the substitution cipher on the phrase "gxddbov xxkxzt pg ifmk" yields "non sunt in coeli, quia fvccant vvivys of heli", which translated means "they are not in heaven because they fuck the wives of Ely" (fvccant is a fake Latin form).[2] The phrase was coded because of its meaning; it is uncertain to what extent the word itself was considered acceptable.
    Other possible connections are to Latin futuere (almost exactly the same meaning as the English verb "to fuck"), (hence the French foutre, the Catalan fotre, the Italian fottere, the Romanian fute, the vulgar peninsular Spanish follar and joder, and the Portuguese foder). However, there is considerable doubt and no clear lineage for these derivations. These roots, even if cognate, are not the original Indo-European word for to copulate; that root is likely *h3yebh-, ("h3" is the H3 laryngeal) which is attested in Sanskrit (yabhati) and the Slavic languages (Russian ебать (yebat'), Polish jebać, Serbian јебати (jebati)), among others: compare Greek "oiphô", and Greek "zephyros" (noun, ref. a Greek belief that the west wind caused pregnancy). However, Wayland Young (who agrees that these words are related) argues that they derive from the Indo-European *bhu- or *bhug-, believed to be the root of "to be", "to grow", and "to build". [Young, 1964]
    Spanish follar has a different root; according to Spanish etymologists, the Spanish verb follar"(attested in the 19th century) derives from fuelle ("bellows") from Latin folle(m) < Indo-European *bhel-; ancient Spanish verb folgar (attested in the 15th century) derived from Latin follicare, also ultimately from follem/follis.
    A possible etymology is suggested by the fact that the Common Germanic fuk-, by an application of Grimm's law, would have as its most likely Indo-European ancestor *pug-, which appears in Latin and Greek words meaning "fight" and "fist". In early Common Germanic the word was likely used at first as a slang or euphemistic replacement for an older word for intercourse, and then became the usual word for intercourse. Then, fuck has cognates in other Germanic languages, such as Middle Dutch fokken (to thrust, copulate, or to breed), dialectical Norwegian fukka (to copulate), and dialectical Swedish focka (to strike, copulate) and fock (penis).
    There is perhaps even an original Celtic derivation; futuere being related to battuere (to strike, to copulate); which may be related to Irish bot and Manx bwoid (penis). The argument is that battuere and futuere (like the Irish and Manx words) comes from the Celtic *bactuere (to pierce), from the root buc- (a point). Or perhaps Latin futuere came from the root fu, Common Indo-European bhu, meaning "be, become" and originally referred to procreation.

    By the time you have finished that, they should have no more to say....LOLOL

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  • by Universe Of Life on March 11th, 2007

    Universe Of Life

    Don't say a word

    walk off ...

    why lower yourself to their sub standard level

    you are much better

    silence is your best defence against a moron ...

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  • by Bluerose on March 11th, 2007

    Bluerose

    Don’t piss me off - I’m running out of places to hide the bodies!

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  • by Halskiisaklink on March 10th, 2007

    Halskiisaklink

    I will, later tonight. What business is that off yours?

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  • by Patti jo on March 4th, 2007

    Patti jo

    Nothing - it get's um every time

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  • by tripwire on March 4th, 2007

    tripwire

    If someone is telling you to fuck off, it's probably not a good idea to push it by being a smart ass and try to get the last word in. Start trying to be clever and the next thing they throw at you will be a fist!! Just walk away..

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  • by Bluerose on March 11th, 2007

    Bluerose

    "When somebody says fu*k off, what can be the best reply be? or what would you say?"

    AFTER YOU!

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  • by DavidHume on March 11th, 2007

    DavidHume

    Say "All right then", and walk away.

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  • by Skip_2_My_Lou on March 4th, 2007

    Skip_2_My_Lou

    No, let's F**k on! lol

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  • by Kevisaurus is a Carnotaurus today on March 10th, 2007

    Kevisaurus is a Carnotaurus today

    It depends on the situation. It's 10 times harder when a family member or good friend says this because there's a lot more emotion and depth behind this sentiment. Whereas if a stranger or insignificant associate says it to you, you can shrug your shoulders and it will bounce off harmlessly. This is a very touchy subject. An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind M.K.G. or anger for anger leads to no peace.

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  • by George Dufferin on March 11th, 2007

    George Dufferin

    Back away and say:

    I'm rubber you're glue
    An' whatever you say
    Bounces off of me
    An' sticks to you.

    then stick out your tongue....

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  • by Michael-Appleyard on March 11th, 2007

    Michael-Appleyard

    "lets get it on... but first, can i get sum more alcohal? you aint hot enough yet!" works for me all the time... after all, beauty is in the eyes of the beer holder!

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  • by LiLDoe on June 16th, 2007

    LiLDoe

    Eat Shit & Die

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  • by Anonymous on May 14th, 2007

    Anonymous

    Only if your Mom's up to it.

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  • by BeamnD on April 12th, 2007

    BeamnD

    Assumption: The situation that led to this was not instantiated by the person being told to "Fxxx Off" - i.e. by nagging/pushing buttons/bullying/etc.

    From personal experience: I believe that the best approach is "self-control" without expanding any negative energy - if possible. I find this a lot more empowering and satisfying than spiraling down with the person in a shouting match - but it does take awareness and "practice"...

    1. Coming from a stranger: take a deep breath and mean: "God bless you", or blow them a soft kiss - not cynically. I have seen this approach "diffuse" the situation and catch people off guard, plus it is much more satisfying than getting angry. However, if this is too difficult, at least leave - don't tolerate abusive behavior in any shape or form.

    2. Coming from an adult you know: if you can stay very calm, say firmly that you can see/understand that the person is angry and needs space but that you do not tolerate that anyone speak to you that way. Then leave the situation.

    3. Coming from a child, it may be useful to let him/her know that it is very inappropriate and hurtful to say anything (not just insults) in anger and to encourage them express the true source of frustration - after they cool off. You may be surprised at the result.

    Self-control exposes the other person to a different kind of response than the one they choose and also preserves you from spiraling in negativity.

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  • by Bluerose on March 11th, 2007

    Bluerose

    Sorry, I don't speak french"

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  • by gerrik on March 11th, 2007

    gerrik

    I would say "who is off"?

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  • by Tedkzn on March 11th, 2007

    Tedkzn

    Ladies and gentleman, its the 3rd annual f*ck off and . . . we have a WINNER!

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  • by worshiptool on March 11th, 2007

    worshiptool

    "not till im ready pal"

    then finish telling them off :)

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  • by steelhamster@aol.com on March 11th, 2007

    steelhamster@aol.com

    As Monty Python said in the "Life of Brian" 'How shall we f*ck off, Messiah?'

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  • by justme32 loves the weekends on March 11th, 2007

    justme32 loves the weekends

    Ill say get f**ked then walk quickly away so I dont have to hear their reply. If Im in a really bad mood I will knock the piss out of the and carry on about my buisness.

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  • by Starmaster on March 11th, 2007

    Starmaster

    If it comes from a good looking girl trying to play a bad wild smart bitch...you may say..."I take a rain check for that"...

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  • by LuckyLefty on March 10th, 2007

    LuckyLefty

    Only time someone ever said that to me was when my girl was crying & i tried to talk to her. I just hugged her when she said that lol, it was cute kinda. "Fuck OFF!!! >.<"

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  • by evil_monkey on November 27th, 2008

    evil_monkey

    If its a guy just smile and say "yes, ma'am." And walk away.

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  • by DiSTurBiA on August 3rd, 2008

    DiSTurBiA

    bend over

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  • by shannnonigans on May 13th, 2008

    shannnonigans

    I'd say:
    "What a novel idea" "you are a witty one aren't you?"
    "after all these years of Fu*king ON I might just have to try Fu*cking OFF for a change"

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  • by pcorr99 on June 16th, 2007

    pcorr99

    Is off any good in bed?

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  • by tjcool4121 on May 31st, 2007

    tjcool4121

    You want to don't You

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  • by Gracin the Strange on April 12th, 2007

    Gracin the Strange

    Stick your hand down the front of your pants roll your eyes back and moan then look at them and say "OK what next?"

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  • by sleeppro on April 12th, 2007

    sleeppro

    God Bless you and then walk away. Been there done that!!

    In His service,
    <:))))<><
    "Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." Romans 12:21

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  • by 1smknjoe on April 4th, 2007

    1smknjoe

    Say, No Thanks because thats the one thing I dislike about you because thats all you ever do is F_ _ k off and I do not ever want to be like you.

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  • by bigkado69 on March 29th, 2007

    bigkado69

    I would tell them to shut the f**k up and to eat a fUc*n d**k

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  • by mejinn on March 18th, 2007

    mejinn

    "Don't threaten me with a good time".

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  • by Bluerose on March 13th, 2007

    Bluerose

    Oh, dear. Have I upset you by any chance.

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  • by Samantha on March 12th, 2007

    Samantha

    addition to 09applemic's "and only a lightswitch away!"

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  • by Esteban-- Smart ass Pumpkin on March 11th, 2007

    Esteban-- Smart ass Pumpkin

    say "what,... again ?" and walk away

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  • by Andy Is Wicked Married to Penal Colony on March 11th, 2007

    Andy Is Wicked Married to Penal Colony

    Nothing at all. I tend to not waste time and energy on people with such limited vocabularies and such vulgar manners. Why bother? Where is that conversation going to go? Nowhere useful I am sure.

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  • by Kgsult on March 11th, 2007

    Kgsult

    "It's better than being F#cked on"

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  • by Valparaiso on March 11th, 2007

    Valparaiso

    I tend to reply sarcastically that I have to desire to have sex with them.

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  • by Gonzo on March 11th, 2007

    Gonzo

    Well, there's nothing you can do really soo errr I'd kill 'em.

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  • by anglrckx on March 11th, 2007

    anglrckx

    I already did. and it was fabulous! thank you very much

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  • by American idle on March 11th, 2007

    American idle

    Nothing. I don't care.

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  • by gtravels loves her life penguin on March 11th, 2007

    gtravels loves her life penguin

    Pardon me, but do you have any Grey Poupon?

    Really though, I wouldn't say anything at all. I'd just smile and walk away. Let them deal with that.

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  • by CoRoNa_ChiCK ILOVEMYH@TERS on January 2nd, 2009

    CoRoNa_ChiCK ILOVEMYH@TERS

    i would either tell them one of these two
    1. I would tell them to get f##ked or
    2. Tell them to go F##K there mom.
    depends why i am being told to F##k off, yes i know how classy.

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  • by Schonberg on November 21st, 2008

    Schonberg

    I always answer: "Do you want me to go away in short jerky movements"?

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  • by orsonwelles on October 5th, 2008

    orsonwelles

    Sorry, you're not my type.

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  • by Rabble on October 5th, 2008

    Rabble

    "But Off doesn't like it."

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  • by technios on August 10th, 2008

    technios

    to fuck off or fuck them up... you decide i do the first option if i pissed them off on accident... you don't need to say shit if you don't want to

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  • by Go know thyself is THE RED QUEEN on August 10th, 2008

    Go know thyself is THE RED QUEEN

    "No sense in being an asshole if you can't prove it I guess?"

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  • by crowjack on July 18th, 2008

    crowjack

    Tell them to talk with dignity and learn some good vocabulary

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